for Odyna11/23/2002 c1 
10ubiquitosity
Hehe, evil queens! I don't know what made me type that...
Can't wait to see the next chapter!
10ubiquitosityHehe, evil queens! I don't know what made me type that...
Can't wait to see the next chapter!
10/30/2002 c1 2SweetFallenAngel
Very nice! write more sooN!WOOOHOOO! skittles are my favourite! CAN I HAVE SOME TOO? pretty please?
2SweetFallenAngelVery nice! write more sooN!WOOOHOOO! skittles are my favourite! CAN I HAVE SOME TOO? pretty please?
10/27/2002 c1 5Leah Claire
Good first part. But you should hint at what's to come if you want people to keep reading. This seems pretty cut and dried right now. We don't even have the promise that something will happen next. Also, I think that part in the beginning where you talk to the reader should either be changed to Cennor thinking about it, or you should move it somewhere else-it just sort of pops up where you put it and interrupts the story. There are smoother ways to tell readers information about the Queen.
Anyway, I like the idea of an evil queen. I like evil characters that are done well. :) Continue.
5Leah ClaireGood first part. But you should hint at what's to come if you want people to keep reading. This seems pretty cut and dried right now. We don't even have the promise that something will happen next. Also, I think that part in the beginning where you talk to the reader should either be changed to Cennor thinking about it, or you should move it somewhere else-it just sort of pops up where you put it and interrupts the story. There are smoother ways to tell readers information about the Queen.
Anyway, I like the idea of an evil queen. I like evil characters that are done well. :) Continue.