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for Me, Myself, and the Universe

9/22/2006 c5 1meonlymejustme
This is an awesome story! The ideas are brilliant and they all seem to make sense and it makes me grin! I like! I'll read the rest 2moro.
9/22/2006 c2 meonlymejustme
Ha great, I love the fact that HE just left it up to other random people! I think I'm going to read this.
9/22/2006 c1 meonlymejustme
How...er random.
7/17/2003 c4 9Tebalea
Good story, but I do get lost sometimes because you can't always keep track of what character is talking.
7/17/2003 c5 Tebalea
Chapter five. I'm noticing a lot of things, phrases that I have heard before. Many from movies, and maybe even books that I cannot recall which. Only but a few. Unknown influences? The plot however, is totally original. Nothing exactly like it that I know of. Once again my praises to you. keep up the good work.
7/16/2003 c1 Tebalea
Good. Very smooth flowing words. So far I like what I see so, I will finish the other chapters on this and then read the sequel. Keep up the good work.
5/28/2003 c15 41Willum
Well, all in all, not a bad story. Not as humorus towards the end, but the fate of everything is a bit serious now, isn't it?

As far as the actual story goes...

Jumping back and forth between narrative and third-person is a bit awkward, and I would suggest choosing one style or the other.

Spell check and grammar are also needed improvements, though not as strongly as with some other stories that I've read.

And, as you admitted, you need to work on your descriptive aspects of the story. This also helps as with the character interaction, not just the background, as there were a few spots where it was easy to get lost as to who was saying what.

All in all, a good story, with some potential for follow ups, and room for improvement. Seeing as how this is your first post, you've done a pretty decent job with it, and I expect you'll improve as you write more-which is the best way to learn.
5/9/2003 c12 Willum
Well, it looks like a conspiracy of...biblical...portions. ;)
5/9/2003 c12 W. Makani
Hm, Metrohell, can't even imagine what it must be like to get to work in the morning THERE. In fact, I wonder what work they DO have in Metrohell.

Nice work once again Smeegol!

A bit short though, left me wanting more!
5/6/2003 c11 W Makani
Oh, my...GOD! (haha, see, it's a pun!)

This is perhaps the funniest story I have read in a long, long time!

It's fantastic, the ideas are superb and the characters magnificent! Flick rocks, I love his short but witty lines, like



"She show'd you her totems didn't she?"

Keep writing damnit!
5/4/2003 c10 Willum
Sorry it took me so long to get to reading this, but life sometimes does that...

Anyhow, I'm still enjoying this story immensely, and look forward to reading it through to the end...when ever that may be.

I think your sense of humor with this story is playing out nicely, and the character of Flick is quickly becoming my favorite.
4/28/2003 c1 4Wylderaven
I'm fascinated already. Of course, now I have to leave the computer only one chapter into it, but I will be back, and with plenty of time to read.

I love stories like this, or at least, I THINK I know where this is heading, so I love where I think it's heading and may very well love it if it's not going where I think it's heading regardless of the direction it takes.

Get that? It's a compliment, just trust me.
3/11/2003 c9 NYQueenie
Good to have you back with us. Your logic is maddening. And correct soundiing. Keep going.
3/8/2003 c8 NYQueenie
Well, you betta get off hiatus real soon, buddy. Or at least give us some idea how long this will take, because I'm tired of cheaking this and seeing zip! Get the led out!
3/2/2003 c1 NYQueenie
Hello? Are you there? Yooho!
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