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for The Cycle of Nothing Much At All

10/17/2003 c1 orangefreak33
School sometimes seems neverending...I do hope I get out sometime.
6/28/2003 c1 125Skitzabeth
heh, that's a really cool poem... i tend to be a society trasher... often because i have nothing better to do, but sometimes i really do have something bad to say about society, and i forget what my point was with all of that, so great poem, it was awesome, thanks for the review
6/15/2003 c1 SHBB
Depressing. Wait, this is humor/parody! Ah, the horror of taking these things seriously! Anyway, sounds vaguely like the kind of things that keep me up at night. Amusing,in an odd way, perfectly suited to me.
5/25/2003 c1 71Spider
I love how you put this in the humor section. That just makes it seem all the more biting. Not funny haha, but funny cynical, which is my favorite kind of funny. I do have a hard time getting a sense of consistant rythm, though. Everytime I think I have it down the next line is missing a syllible or has too many syllibles and I'm just lost. Could be I'm just dumb, or maybe it needs a little tweaking. But before you do that, take the first option into serious consideration. It has a bad habit of comming true. :)

You've been reading my stuff... I warn you not to go too far back in time. About a year ago I was at a 4th grade writing level. I mean that figuratively, but the meaning behind it stands.
3/8/2003 c1 I refuse to sign in. can't the stupid computer get that
Wow. O_O that was *so* good! I liked that so much. It reminds me of two things, a quote that got changed around

"Nothing is important because death is inevitable" to

"Everything is important because death is inevitable".

and 'we didn't start the fire' by billy joel. That song is too cool. *walks away with song now stuck in head* lala lala de da do da da dada dada da da dada dada.
3/7/2003 c1 11Katriel
This is so great! I loved it! It is really meaning full and flows great! I loved it.it's just.great!
3/4/2003 c1 RainShadow2005
This describes where our society is headed. I saw this everyday in high school. Now that I'm in college, life seems a little more balanced with people who actually care about their lives. The others are out there, but they don't usually stick around long, just like your poem says. They leave and don't have anybody to say goodbye to. Good poem.
3/1/2003 c1 purpleyin
yeah, it does sound bitter, but its good.

sounds like your talking about the shallow cycle of plebby people. and most people's lives seem to be about that, working until the end, wanting nothing but some estraanged perfection that they can't recognise.

i get it

i like it.

great poem
2/28/2003 c1 98ShadowGal
Awesome poem! It has real meaning and great flow, I like it a lot!



One line I saw that could be fixed, however, is this one:

"The puppets drag themselves out of bed"

"The puppets drag themselves from bed" would flow better, IMHO, but other than that. Excellent job!

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