for The Quicksilver Medallion5/11/2003 c5 The-Mighty-Koshi
Thank you I like the Hornblower too. Anyways your knowledge of ships makes this story more and more realistic. I am asking off you to please write more chapters I really like this story.
*bows*
Thank you I like the Hornblower too. Anyways your knowledge of ships makes this story more and more realistic. I am asking off you to please write more chapters I really like this story.
*bows*
4/23/2003 c4 
12Naamela
Me again.
I don't like writing in first person...it doesn't leave much room for description and (as a very wise friend of mine says) when I do, it looks "fluffy." I just looked over my work in Saphra's voice here and...I can do better.
So I've written an alternative first two chapters in 3rd person-they're better, I think-but when I get 'em up, tell me which version you like better.
12NaamelaMe again.
I don't like writing in first person...it doesn't leave much room for description and (as a very wise friend of mine says) when I do, it looks "fluffy." I just looked over my work in Saphra's voice here and...I can do better.
So I've written an alternative first two chapters in 3rd person-they're better, I think-but when I get 'em up, tell me which version you like better.
4/23/2003 c1 QueenCloud
Well,I must say this is an extrodinary story!,I loved the first paragraph about the fire,And how You described this part:'My Flightwings cut through the air like a hot blade through snow,'This story is just magnificent,A great read for the first chapter
Well,I must say this is an extrodinary story!,I loved the first paragraph about the fire,And how You described this part:'My Flightwings cut through the air like a hot blade through snow,'This story is just magnificent,A great read for the first chapter
4/23/2003 c3 8Kezkay
Formatting is fine, don't worry! Tabs and such vanish when you save as .html, but itallics should still be there. What program are you using? Sorry it took me so long to get back, I'm a lazy bum when I can afford to be, hehe. Finely done chapter, though I would like to know a little more about the relationship between the main character and Ashiri (totally cool name by the way), it's still kind of ambiguous... The description as Saphra reached the hanger ( for lack of a better word) was very nice, it painted a very nice picture. I PROMISE I'll be back soon, -Kez
8KezkayFormatting is fine, don't worry! Tabs and such vanish when you save as .html, but itallics should still be there. What program are you using? Sorry it took me so long to get back, I'm a lazy bum when I can afford to be, hehe. Finely done chapter, though I would like to know a little more about the relationship between the main character and Ashiri (totally cool name by the way), it's still kind of ambiguous... The description as Saphra reached the hanger ( for lack of a better word) was very nice, it painted a very nice picture. I PROMISE I'll be back soon, -Kez
4/17/2003 c2 Gold Enchantress
Not as confusing as the previous chapter, thank goodness. *sighs with relief* Suvaai-or Sovay...such a strange baby girl. This is the same Sovay you mentioned in your author's note from the previous chapter, right?
Not as confusing as the previous chapter, thank goodness. *sighs with relief* Suvaai-or Sovay...such a strange baby girl. This is the same Sovay you mentioned in your author's note from the previous chapter, right?
4/17/2003 c1 Gold Enchantress
A little weird and confusing, but good nevertheless. I can live with confusion.
A little weird and confusing, but good nevertheless. I can live with confusion.
4/17/2003 c4 The-Mighty-Koshi
Wow, I really like your story here. Especially how you flip the view points very nice touch there. I also think it was wise of you NOT to explain during the first chapter (That would be a bit boring won't it!) Good dialoge and nice describing techniques. A true story with potential.
*bows*
Koshi-chan
Wow, I really like your story here. Especially how you flip the view points very nice touch there. I also think it was wise of you NOT to explain during the first chapter (That would be a bit boring won't it!) Good dialoge and nice describing techniques. A true story with potential.
*bows*
Koshi-chan
3/22/2003 c1 1fifi88
like my teacher said when you assume you make an ass out of u and me. (just thought i'd give you that tidbit of imformation) ^-^
1fifi88like my teacher said when you assume you make an ass out of u and me. (just thought i'd give you that tidbit of imformation) ^-^
3/22/2003 c4 Anonymous
I stink at watching the details, but I'll just keep on reading. This is a great story.
I stink at watching the details, but I'll just keep on reading. This is a great story.
3/22/2003 c1 Scotia Li
Nah, I scuba dive (you'll see evidence of this in later chapters), but it feels like flying. I'm working on the formatting...
I wanted to say something else...what was it? Oh yes. Read my other stories. ^-^
Nah, I scuba dive (you'll see evidence of this in later chapters), but it feels like flying. I'm working on the formatting...
I wanted to say something else...what was it? Oh yes. Read my other stories. ^-^
3/21/2003 c2 8Kezkay
awesome plot! Do you hang-glide or something? Because you painted the feelings of flying perfectly (weird wording, I know) *makes me want to be a bird, heh* The only thing I was confused about was the POV change at the end of the first chapter, but I think I got it. Now, about your formatting, did you save the document as an html? if you do, all indents are erased. -Kez
8Kezkayawesome plot! Do you hang-glide or something? Because you painted the feelings of flying perfectly (weird wording, I know) *makes me want to be a bird, heh* The only thing I was confused about was the POV change at the end of the first chapter, but I think I got it. Now, about your formatting, did you save the document as an html? if you do, all indents are erased. -Kez
3/21/2003 c1 Scotia Li
Yeah...forgot to write. The song lyrics ("Lollay, lollay, litel childe" etc.) are in Middle English, so yeah, typos should be expected. They're actually the words of a lullaby written in about 1200 AD. Aren't they purty? ^-^
Yeah...forgot to write. The song lyrics ("Lollay, lollay, litel childe" etc.) are in Middle English, so yeah, typos should be expected. They're actually the words of a lullaby written in about 1200 AD. Aren't they purty? ^-^
3/21/2003 c4 16RuathaWehrling
Hey! Thanks for reading/reviewing my story. I'm here to return the favor!
I really like it! It's a little confusing right now, since you have two TOTALLY different story lines going on, but I'm assuming you'll fix that byy bringing them together in future chapters.
A few corrections:
Chapter One:
"Ever to lib in sorrow"
16RuathaWehrlingHey! Thanks for reading/reviewing my story. I'm here to return the favor!
I really like it! It's a little confusing right now, since you have two TOTALLY different story lines going on, but I'm assuming you'll fix that byy bringing them together in future chapters.
A few corrections:
Chapter One:
"Ever to lib in sorrow"
3/13/2003 c1 12Naamela
Heh...sorry "mrow", had to delete your review (but I'm keeping it in my e-mail so I'll put it to good use)...it contained something that was a PLOT GIVEAWAY (dun dun dun).
That's what ya get for telling your friends the WHOLE plotline of the story before they read it, people. Si e.
Thx for the nice reviews everyone else. Sayonara
12NaamelaHeh...sorry "mrow", had to delete your review (but I'm keeping it in my e-mail so I'll put it to good use)...it contained something that was a PLOT GIVEAWAY (dun dun dun).
That's what ya get for telling your friends the WHOLE plotline of the story before they read it, people. Si e.
Thx for the nice reviews everyone else. Sayonara