for The Unwavering Desire3/22/2004 c1 
10DrunkenMonkeyKing
Hey very nice!
I tend to be wary around fics that include mixtures of animal and people, but you pulled it off much better than any other writer I've really seen. That and your details really put the reader in the scene. Good job.
10DrunkenMonkeyKingHey very nice!
I tend to be wary around fics that include mixtures of animal and people, but you pulled it off much better than any other writer I've really seen. That and your details really put the reader in the scene. Good job.
12/30/2003 c7 6Blue Dragon-sy
Whee! Here I am, reviewing your story! ^_^ But let me warn you first before I start… I am very horrible at constructive criticism! Yes, it’s true! That’s why sometimes I don’t type too much in a review. _ Anyway, you asked for a review so here it is:
I can tell that this is good story! Whee! But there are a few things that really struck me when I’m reading this story (so sorry, no offence intended) ^^; You do like anime, don’t you? Eh, why this question all of a sudden? Because you made the characters ‘sweatdropping’ and popping veins when they’re angry! ^_^ However, usually I don’t like those because they seem unrealistic (Tell me, have you seen a real life person sweat drop before? =P). But that’s just my opinion so don’t worry over it.
I think someone mentioned this before, but this story lacks character description. Take Hyo,or example. He’s a leopard demi-human, right? But that’s all I know about his looks. You should describe his appearance more, like whether he looks like a human with leopard ears and tail or something. Sorry if I offended you, but I’m just typing my thoughts of this story.
Overall, this is a great story! It has an okay storyline, but written in a great way! I’m gonna read the sequel soon! BTW, thankies for your review/constructive criticism! I really appreciate it! ^_^
-”No one can truly determine the outcome of an action, not even the one who guards Time.” ~Jruceques, from my story Shadow Claw-
6Blue Dragon-syWhee! Here I am, reviewing your story! ^_^ But let me warn you first before I start… I am very horrible at constructive criticism! Yes, it’s true! That’s why sometimes I don’t type too much in a review. _ Anyway, you asked for a review so here it is:
I can tell that this is good story! Whee! But there are a few things that really struck me when I’m reading this story (so sorry, no offence intended) ^^; You do like anime, don’t you? Eh, why this question all of a sudden? Because you made the characters ‘sweatdropping’ and popping veins when they’re angry! ^_^ However, usually I don’t like those because they seem unrealistic (Tell me, have you seen a real life person sweat drop before? =P). But that’s just my opinion so don’t worry over it.
I think someone mentioned this before, but this story lacks character description. Take Hyo,or example. He’s a leopard demi-human, right? But that’s all I know about his looks. You should describe his appearance more, like whether he looks like a human with leopard ears and tail or something. Sorry if I offended you, but I’m just typing my thoughts of this story.
Overall, this is a great story! It has an okay storyline, but written in a great way! I’m gonna read the sequel soon! BTW, thankies for your review/constructive criticism! I really appreciate it! ^_^
-”No one can truly determine the outcome of an action, not even the one who guards Time.” ~Jruceques, from my story Shadow Claw-
10/4/2003 c1 132mizu no kokoro
pretty good. It's gonna take me a while to read all of it though. I will do my best ^^ one chapter day... *is about to drop dead from the loads of hmwk*
132mizu no kokoropretty good. It's gonna take me a while to read all of it though. I will do my best ^^ one chapter day... *is about to drop dead from the loads of hmwk*
10/1/2003 c2 1Kokuryuu
Heheh...young human girls have always had the easiest time getting what they desire... I pitty Kazo, considering he lost his brother. Perhaps you already knew this, but Tatsu means 'dragon' in Japanese, as does ryuu and doragon (f. doragonette). That trenchcoat guy is a bastard! How the bloody hell could someone even hope to cover by saying he was doing a favor? And I thought Kogua was brainless... Anyway, this story is going to my favorites. Also, arigatou for reviewing my story. Usually my favorite authors aren't the ones to review my fics, so I really appreciate it.
Sayou Nara!
~Kinryou
1KokuryuuHeheh...young human girls have always had the easiest time getting what they desire... I pitty Kazo, considering he lost his brother. Perhaps you already knew this, but Tatsu means 'dragon' in Japanese, as does ryuu and doragon (f. doragonette). That trenchcoat guy is a bastard! How the bloody hell could someone even hope to cover by saying he was doing a favor? And I thought Kogua was brainless... Anyway, this story is going to my favorites. Also, arigatou for reviewing my story. Usually my favorite authors aren't the ones to review my fics, so I really appreciate it.
Sayou Nara!
~Kinryou
9/30/2003 c1 Kinryou AKA TerraMillenniumDragon
I see...when I red the summary, I didn't exactly understand the 'demi-human' part, but now that I've read the first chapter, I think I understand. Hana was...odd, but that doesn't mean she isn't an amusing little human (I could be incorect on her race, but from your description of her, she seems to be human)! Green Shins...heh! Everyone's just so tallented at pronouncing names... I shall now continue reading.
Sayou nara,
Kinryou
I see...when I red the summary, I didn't exactly understand the 'demi-human' part, but now that I've read the first chapter, I think I understand. Hana was...odd, but that doesn't mean she isn't an amusing little human (I could be incorect on her race, but from your description of her, she seems to be human)! Green Shins...heh! Everyone's just so tallented at pronouncing names... I shall now continue reading.
Sayou nara,
Kinryou
8/27/2003 c1 8Sanderek
It was good... Hana sort of seems like she's insane though... lol. It reminds me of an anime cartoon or somethin... Anyway, the grammer could be fixed, but in all... its very creative! Keep up the good work, and dont read my story... its really stupid. (the only reason i wrote it is because i needed the idea copy-writed for an rpg game) However, i will put out one of my better stories (not my best one though, i dont trust this site)
8SanderekIt was good... Hana sort of seems like she's insane though... lol. It reminds me of an anime cartoon or somethin... Anyway, the grammer could be fixed, but in all... its very creative! Keep up the good work, and dont read my story... its really stupid. (the only reason i wrote it is because i needed the idea copy-writed for an rpg game) However, i will put out one of my better stories (not my best one though, i dont trust this site)
8/22/2003 c2 30Silverfire Starr
Hew that was very good. Love ur descriptions! The cake had me hungry.
I especially like how u separate the story into many subplots. Great Job!
s.s
p.s. Thanks for the review! I have a new story "Daughter of Fire' It's completely different from Klacialand. Can u check it out sometime? Thanks!
30Silverfire StarrHew that was very good. Love ur descriptions! The cake had me hungry.
I especially like how u separate the story into many subplots. Great Job!
s.s
p.s. Thanks for the review! I have a new story "Daughter of Fire' It's completely different from Klacialand. Can u check it out sometime? Thanks!
8/14/2003 c6 39zelle
Hm..still not entirely sure why Granar needed to kill Hyo (*whimpers* Hyo...) but I have a feeling that this is going to get settled rather quickly ^_^
And poor Hana *shakes head* stuck between it all...
And I still don't quite get Hana...I mean, is she some kind of angel in disguise? Or...something else...da da dum!
And the rat-man?
Hm...
And oh, dear god! The imagery at the beginning! *gets tears in eyes* so beautiful! More..please? *puppy dog eyes*
Honestly. That was marvellous. I think I read it at least three-times over...
*pets computer screen* so..pretty...
39zelleHm..still not entirely sure why Granar needed to kill Hyo (*whimpers* Hyo...) but I have a feeling that this is going to get settled rather quickly ^_^
And poor Hana *shakes head* stuck between it all...
And I still don't quite get Hana...I mean, is she some kind of angel in disguise? Or...something else...da da dum!
And the rat-man?
Hm...
And oh, dear god! The imagery at the beginning! *gets tears in eyes* so beautiful! More..please? *puppy dog eyes*
Honestly. That was marvellous. I think I read it at least three-times over...
*pets computer screen* so..pretty...
8/11/2003 c1 6Concetta
It's a purty cool story! It's really well written, too! Thanks for reviewing my dragon story!
Ciao!
6ConcettaIt's a purty cool story! It's really well written, too! Thanks for reviewing my dragon story!
Ciao!
8/9/2003 c5 39zelle
NO! Hyo? Why?
*sobs*
But...but I liked him...
And what about Hana? Does she go to Granar now? Why was there a promise about the fight? Why did Granar have to kill Hyo? And who is that cloaked stranger? And what was the reference to the Bible?
And why do I ask so many questions...
*sigh* I suppose it will all be explained in a later chapter, no?
*squirms in seat*...*quickly continues reading*
39zelleNO! Hyo? Why?
*sobs*
But...but I liked him...
And what about Hana? Does she go to Granar now? Why was there a promise about the fight? Why did Granar have to kill Hyo? And who is that cloaked stranger? And what was the reference to the Bible?
And why do I ask so many questions...
*sigh* I suppose it will all be explained in a later chapter, no?
*squirms in seat*...*quickly continues reading*
7/31/2003 c7 3korakane
nice ending. now i have to wait some more until Chapter Three of Angel's Seal comes out. this is one long chapter, but hey, its an ending, so it makes sense. i have almost complested typing "Dragonstone" and am on page 330. just about to fight the final fight of the book, and then the final chapter and the Epilogue. there are going to be a lot of endings for me today. but then again, thats a good thing so i can finally start on "Medallion" again. look for that one. no seriously, this book had a REALLY nice ending, and sets up "The Angel's Seal" just perfectly. cant wait to see how that one turns out. you planning on doing part three?
3korakanenice ending. now i have to wait some more until Chapter Three of Angel's Seal comes out. this is one long chapter, but hey, its an ending, so it makes sense. i have almost complested typing "Dragonstone" and am on page 330. just about to fight the final fight of the book, and then the final chapter and the Epilogue. there are going to be a lot of endings for me today. but then again, thats a good thing so i can finally start on "Medallion" again. look for that one. no seriously, this book had a REALLY nice ending, and sets up "The Angel's Seal" just perfectly. cant wait to see how that one turns out. you planning on doing part three?
7/28/2003 c6 korakane
the talking animals are cool. what is the purpose of this chapter? it seems to fill a hole between two parts of the story. i am just fine with that, and then at the very end. Granar, the big dragon against Kazo. so basically, the final fight of the story is against Granar and Kazo. why did you have to kill off Hyo, anyway? killing off main characters is cool. i still haven't decided if i should kill *someone* off in Dragonstone. it might not be a good idea with all the death that will be in Medallion, but it will certainly take people by surprise.
the talking animals are cool. what is the purpose of this chapter? it seems to fill a hole between two parts of the story. i am just fine with that, and then at the very end. Granar, the big dragon against Kazo. so basically, the final fight of the story is against Granar and Kazo. why did you have to kill off Hyo, anyway? killing off main characters is cool. i still haven't decided if i should kill *someone* off in Dragonstone. it might not be a good idea with all the death that will be in Medallion, but it will certainly take people by surprise.
7/26/2003 c7 4ColorCrayons
i liked this chapter a lot, there was a lot of detail and effort in it. interesting. i like Hana a lot but Hyo is my favorite...despite the fact that he's "dead" or whatever. good, good, good.
~color outside the lines~
PS heehee, on my last one i spelt "great" wrong...srry i saw that and it was annoying me
4ColorCrayonsi liked this chapter a lot, there was a lot of detail and effort in it. interesting. i like Hana a lot but Hyo is my favorite...despite the fact that he's "dead" or whatever. good, good, good.
~color outside the lines~
PS heehee, on my last one i spelt "great" wrong...srry i saw that and it was annoying me