for Happy Birthday1/20/2007 c3 
31emptyword
Nothing wrong with your first-person attempt. Nicely done. It's choppy in places, and your format is a little confusing, especially when I'm trying to figure out who is narrating and who is speaking, but the story itself is well done.
"And it's frightening to think these are the last things I’ll ever say. . . not a great contribution to the world of literature is it. . ." - Shot through with unadultered, bitter pain. I cannot imagine a more truthful confession.
31emptywordNothing wrong with your first-person attempt. Nicely done. It's choppy in places, and your format is a little confusing, especially when I'm trying to figure out who is narrating and who is speaking, but the story itself is well done.
"And it's frightening to think these are the last things I’ll ever say. . . not a great contribution to the world of literature is it. . ." - Shot through with unadultered, bitter pain. I cannot imagine a more truthful confession.
12/23/2005 c3 5atadobsessive5345
I really like this. I'm kind of glad there wasn't resolution with his parents because there are always things left unresolved in real life and everything like that. So, it was more realistic like that. I liked the emotions and you did a good job writing in first person. The scenes were fun to picture in my head at least, and I really liked reading this. Great job.
5atadobsessive5345I really like this. I'm kind of glad there wasn't resolution with his parents because there are always things left unresolved in real life and everything like that. So, it was more realistic like that. I liked the emotions and you did a good job writing in first person. The scenes were fun to picture in my head at least, and I really liked reading this. Great job.
11/9/2005 c3 Rowenna
This was high quality! very expressive and emotional, and extremely well written. Haven't read one so good in a while.
This was high quality! very expressive and emotional, and extremely well written. Haven't read one so good in a while.
10/3/2005 c3 54rainbowskye
Aw, it's a happy ending, well, compared to some of the ways it could have turned out. I like the mix of POVs.. it's nice to see the contrast between what's happening for both characters. It was a good story.. I loved reading it.
54rainbowskyeAw, it's a happy ending, well, compared to some of the ways it could have turned out. I like the mix of POVs.. it's nice to see the contrast between what's happening for both characters. It was a good story.. I loved reading it.
10/3/2005 c2 rainbowskye
It was great to see someone elses POV and the extra emotions that it brought to the story. It's done really well and what he's feeling is conveyed really well.
It was great to see someone elses POV and the extra emotions that it brought to the story. It's done really well and what he's feeling is conveyed really well.
10/3/2005 c1 rainbowskye
I love the last part of this, the last two lines, because I think that it's really great how you used the answer machine message to end it.. It is the truth after all
I love the last part of this, the last two lines, because I think that it's really great how you used the answer machine message to end it.. It is the truth after all
9/16/2005 c3 Kamiavee
not a tragedy at all...= =, fooled by the author...die die die die /not a rat die after all..but a sweet small story nevertheless!
not a tragedy at all...= =, fooled by the author...die die die die /not a rat die after all..but a sweet small story nevertheless!
12/30/2004 c3 2subtleline
Wow...This was amazing. I mean yeah its depressing but still its kinda sweet in the end. I think u ended it at a very good spot though part of me wants to find out more bout these two. So amazing.
2subtlelineWow...This was amazing. I mean yeah its depressing but still its kinda sweet in the end. I think u ended it at a very good spot though part of me wants to find out more bout these two. So amazing.
3/27/2004 c3 1A Griff of Many Colours
O_O *jawdrops* That was awesome! Absolutely incredible. So sad in parts, but otherwise a great read. Well done!
1A Griff of Many ColoursO_O *jawdrops* That was awesome! Absolutely incredible. So sad in parts, but otherwise a great read. Well done!
7/21/2003 c3 Crimson Night
I like...it was interesting. Besides I needed a good angsty fic. Always do. Anies, great story!
I like...it was interesting. Besides I needed a good angsty fic. Always do. Anies, great story!
6/14/2003 c3 12Tyde
Don't you ever say that your writing is crap..it's fantastic! I have tears in my eyes reading this. It was so emotional and reminded me a little of the time I discovered that I was in love with my friend at school. I didn't want to be gay..I always wanted to be different, but I didn't want to stand out so much. Luckily I never went as far as Richey did, but it was a tough time accepting it. Amidst a Flood of Tears (One of the poems you read - thanks for your reviews!) is actually about her wedding.
You're going straight on my favourite story and author list :o)
12TydeDon't you ever say that your writing is crap..it's fantastic! I have tears in my eyes reading this. It was so emotional and reminded me a little of the time I discovered that I was in love with my friend at school. I didn't want to be gay..I always wanted to be different, but I didn't want to stand out so much. Luckily I never went as far as Richey did, but it was a tough time accepting it. Amidst a Flood of Tears (One of the poems you read - thanks for your reviews!) is actually about her wedding.
You're going straight on my favourite story and author list :o)
6/6/2003 c1 39iustus
I can't get over how much I love this story. I think about it every day. Sign of a great writer.
39iustusI can't get over how much I love this story. I think about it every day. Sign of a great writer.
6/1/2003 c3 PseudoBohemian
Yo,
I like it. It's realistic...angsty and depressing but strangely uplifting. I _liked_ the fact that there was no resolution with his parents. It kept it from cliches and the ending was nice...slightly ambiguous. Ya know I love your writing ^~
~Pseudo
Yo,
I like it. It's realistic...angsty and depressing but strangely uplifting. I _liked_ the fact that there was no resolution with his parents. It kept it from cliches and the ending was nice...slightly ambiguous. Ya know I love your writing ^~
~Pseudo
5/22/2003 c3 crazee-diamond
I really like this. I also like the ironic title. Very interesting. about doing a sequal, go for it. I'd read it. Either way, because some of this story's greatness is in the fact that the true ending is really unknown. rock on...
I really like this. I also like the ironic title. Very interesting. about doing a sequal, go for it. I'd read it. Either way, because some of this story's greatness is in the fact that the true ending is really unknown. rock on...