for Loki5/17/2003 c7 
68S. R. Devaste
WOW! I would pay money to read this, it is amazing. However some scenes were too descriptive, I just skipped them because I wanted to get on with it. You have to write more, this is soo good. I mean it is the best thing I have ever read on this sight..I am so glad I found this..one day I can say I knew a famouse author...or well I read her work before the bok came out lol. Once it is in you should send it to a editer. Please read reveiw some of my work.
68S. R. DevasteWOW! I would pay money to read this, it is amazing. However some scenes were too descriptive, I just skipped them because I wanted to get on with it. You have to write more, this is soo good. I mean it is the best thing I have ever read on this sight..I am so glad I found this..one day I can say I knew a famouse author...or well I read her work before the bok came out lol. Once it is in you should send it to a editer. Please read reveiw some of my work.
5/7/2003 c5 8Kezkay
*squeals for joy once again, adds in random howls and whistles* There are not enough synonyms for "totally cool!" I'm SO sorry that it took me so long to get back to your fic! Really lazy + lots-o-school work does not = well-rounded schedule. How DARE you leave me with that cliff-hanger ending! ACK! Is Sigurd who I think he is, or do I have my Norse mythology mixed up? He's a cool addition to your mix, as is Nixon, and I've always been fond of Loki. Write more soon, thanks for the compliment! -Kez
8Kezkay*squeals for joy once again, adds in random howls and whistles* There are not enough synonyms for "totally cool!" I'm SO sorry that it took me so long to get back to your fic! Really lazy + lots-o-school work does not = well-rounded schedule. How DARE you leave me with that cliff-hanger ending! ACK! Is Sigurd who I think he is, or do I have my Norse mythology mixed up? He's a cool addition to your mix, as is Nixon, and I've always been fond of Loki. Write more soon, thanks for the compliment! -Kez
5/7/2003 c4 Kezkay
*squeal of joy* total coolness Zelle! I tell ya, you get some WEIRD looks when you start laughing uproariously in the library... Loki seems like a interesting guy, as does this other fanged-guy in the boat. *goes to read next chapter*
*squeal of joy* total coolness Zelle! I tell ya, you get some WEIRD looks when you start laughing uproariously in the library... Loki seems like a interesting guy, as does this other fanged-guy in the boat. *goes to read next chapter*
5/4/2003 c6 BellaMusa
Ah it is true fan fiction does get more reviews *shakes head saddly* But don't give up! I still like your story no matter how many reviews you have! Keep Writing! I can't wait to see where this goes!
Ah it is true fan fiction does get more reviews *shakes head saddly* But don't give up! I still like your story no matter how many reviews you have! Keep Writing! I can't wait to see where this goes!
4/29/2003 c5 4Sabriel4
Zelle...
interesting work, these last few chapters. The plot *has* thickened, and I'm curious - whose castle is she heading for?
Cause you asked for constructive criticism, some of your vocabulary seems a little awkward (i.e. "semi-convincing smile") but this is great in overall, and I look forward to reading more of it!
Sabriel
4Sabriel4Zelle...
interesting work, these last few chapters. The plot *has* thickened, and I'm curious - whose castle is she heading for?
Cause you asked for constructive criticism, some of your vocabulary seems a little awkward (i.e. "semi-convincing smile") but this is great in overall, and I look forward to reading more of it!
Sabriel
4/23/2003 c3 8Kezkay
A flea's chance in hell, huh? Funny! This chapter really made me laugh, I think it was how Zelle reacted to certain situations and her personal thoughts. I was wondering though, how come you don't use itallics for thoughts at all? Sometimes the / got me confused, though I think I can safely blame that on the lack of sleep and the amounts of homework, ack. Jeez, another chapter to review? Didn't know my e-mail would spur you to such lengths :) RRarg, I'll be back to review soon!
-Kez
PS, Insanity IS relative, definitely, MWA HA HA!
8KezkayA flea's chance in hell, huh? Funny! This chapter really made me laugh, I think it was how Zelle reacted to certain situations and her personal thoughts. I was wondering though, how come you don't use itallics for thoughts at all? Sometimes the / got me confused, though I think I can safely blame that on the lack of sleep and the amounts of homework, ack. Jeez, another chapter to review? Didn't know my e-mail would spur you to such lengths :) RRarg, I'll be back to review soon!
-Kez
PS, Insanity IS relative, definitely, MWA HA HA!
4/13/2003 c2 Kezkay
YAY! Lovely description of the garden, the mists, the forests, and all the rest. It was great how you incorporated the other senses into the detail, like "touch", while most writers usually never go beyond "sight."
I can tell you spent a lot of time on this chapter, either that or you had many flashes of writer's genius, and the pace that it went was perfect. RRarg, i can't stand it when people just gloss over the scene-setter and skip to the dialogue. Hmm, I wonder who that Valkyrie person was? She seems like a person you wouldn't want to meet in a dark alleyway, heh? By the way, have you ever read Mickey Zucker Reichart's books about the Renshai? That's where I get most of my Norse mythology info from, hehe. I will read the next chapter soon, Kez
YAY! Lovely description of the garden, the mists, the forests, and all the rest. It was great how you incorporated the other senses into the detail, like "touch", while most writers usually never go beyond "sight."
I can tell you spent a lot of time on this chapter, either that or you had many flashes of writer's genius, and the pace that it went was perfect. RRarg, i can't stand it when people just gloss over the scene-setter and skip to the dialogue. Hmm, I wonder who that Valkyrie person was? She seems like a person you wouldn't want to meet in a dark alleyway, heh? By the way, have you ever read Mickey Zucker Reichart's books about the Renshai? That's where I get most of my Norse mythology info from, hehe. I will read the next chapter soon, Kez
4/12/2003 c2 1Bryen
Bravo :) Thank you for the good comments, and to Kez. Yes I did write my song. Everything I write is original unless I state otherwise :) Anyway, to yours. Almost flawless. A grammatical error here or there, like instead of Hell. You put Hel once.. And accidentally put a period in the middle of a sentence. 'It coaxed and led me gently to.something.' Very interesting. Great introduction, looking forward to the next chapter which I will be reading now. :)
1BryenBravo :) Thank you for the good comments, and to Kez. Yes I did write my song. Everything I write is original unless I state otherwise :) Anyway, to yours. Almost flawless. A grammatical error here or there, like instead of Hell. You put Hel once.. And accidentally put a period in the middle of a sentence. 'It coaxed and led me gently to.something.' Very interesting. Great introduction, looking forward to the next chapter which I will be reading now. :)
4/11/2003 c2 4Sabriel4
Lady Zelle...
Interesting work... your writing is more lyrical than most of the FP stuff I have read; a refreshing change.
Your characters are well-written, and you have also managed to put a rather unique spin (I liked the implementation of the Valkyrie/ shapeshifter) on the usual tale of the troubled human transported into the realm of Faerie.
Update soon, please!
Sabriel
4Sabriel4Lady Zelle...
Interesting work... your writing is more lyrical than most of the FP stuff I have read; a refreshing change.
Your characters are well-written, and you have also managed to put a rather unique spin (I liked the implementation of the Valkyrie/ shapeshifter) on the usual tale of the troubled human transported into the realm of Faerie.
Update soon, please!
Sabriel
4/11/2003 c2 Songwind
Ne, very cool! *thumbs up* This story is definitely interesting. Just a question, DID you base this off of a dream? Cause it sounds a HECK of a lot like mine could be.. only without the freaky woman or the blood-ness. And there aren't any TV show chars... well, I'll shut up now.
Anyway, this is really cool and I hope you update this!
Ne, very cool! *thumbs up* This story is definitely interesting. Just a question, DID you base this off of a dream? Cause it sounds a HECK of a lot like mine could be.. only without the freaky woman or the blood-ness. And there aren't any TV show chars... well, I'll shut up now.
Anyway, this is really cool and I hope you update this!
3/24/2003 c1 Claire
hey! good job so far on the story! just one questino...are you gonna change the title or are you gonna keep it lyk this.
newayz, you know me, im ur beta reader ^_^ hee-hee
hey! good job so far on the story! just one questino...are you gonna change the title or are you gonna keep it lyk this.
newayz, you know me, im ur beta reader ^_^ hee-hee
3/22/2003 c1 xue rui chi
This is good! please, please continue.
This is good! please, please continue.
3/22/2003 c1 8Kezkay
ACK! Yet AGAIN this blasted site won't let me do a signed review! *growls, forces self to calm down* Now, back to your fic. Heh, luved it! Very nice job, description, character, the whole shebang! *puts on favorite list* Look for me next update, kez
PS. My friend Bryen is metaphorically fishing for reviews for his fic, Forgotten Fire: the lost crown. If ever you have the time, please go check it out? And no, this is not a stupid ploy to get you to check out mine, I'm not him :) -Kez
8KezkayACK! Yet AGAIN this blasted site won't let me do a signed review! *growls, forces self to calm down* Now, back to your fic. Heh, luved it! Very nice job, description, character, the whole shebang! *puts on favorite list* Look for me next update, kez
PS. My friend Bryen is metaphorically fishing for reviews for his fic, Forgotten Fire: the lost crown. If ever you have the time, please go check it out? And no, this is not a stupid ploy to get you to check out mine, I'm not him :) -Kez