for Transparent Hopes Journal Entries of a Queen9/10/2003 c1 
7Matt5
Boy, I wish i could write something this good... i guess i dont have the patience... lol. Exceptional work, very powerful and moving. Only two things i could see: 5th paragraph from the bottom, when she writes about her feet, the last line says "what form of feet were these for e ruler."
Also, 2nd line of the 3rd paragraph from the bottom you say "and faeries."
Otherwise very good, a little confuzzling, but again i don't have much patience to delve deeper into its meaning. keep writing. perhaps you could look at my new short story "the forgotten." it's something i've never done before, and quite graphic as it deals with war.
7Matt5Boy, I wish i could write something this good... i guess i dont have the patience... lol. Exceptional work, very powerful and moving. Only two things i could see: 5th paragraph from the bottom, when she writes about her feet, the last line says "what form of feet were these for e ruler."
Also, 2nd line of the 3rd paragraph from the bottom you say "and faeries."
Otherwise very good, a little confuzzling, but again i don't have much patience to delve deeper into its meaning. keep writing. perhaps you could look at my new short story "the forgotten." it's something i've never done before, and quite graphic as it deals with war.
5/2/2003 c1 crying in the rain
aww...so sad...so sweet! I luv the way you write! Keep writing.
aww...so sad...so sweet! I luv the way you write! Keep writing.
4/26/2003 c1 Glastonbury
The way you describe is amazing. Your descriptive words are very good, and i cant really put anything down. ohh, i was looking forward to finding faults! Ahh not really, that was great, i really enjoyed it. Good work.
The way you describe is amazing. Your descriptive words are very good, and i cant really put anything down. ohh, i was looking forward to finding faults! Ahh not really, that was great, i really enjoyed it. Good work.
4/22/2003 c1 36phish2phish
hey this point of view isnt that bad, in fact it's rather...good...thats the only way to put it. you have a very strong point in point of view works the character of penelope is conveyed very well here! i know it is very hard to do that because i have read homer's odyssey and penelope is in homer's odyssey very little so it would seem you would have to infer it, but it is a very good inferrence! thanks if you can review mine lol i really like all of your writings!
-phish2phish
36phish2phishhey this point of view isnt that bad, in fact it's rather...good...thats the only way to put it. you have a very strong point in point of view works the character of penelope is conveyed very well here! i know it is very hard to do that because i have read homer's odyssey and penelope is in homer's odyssey very little so it would seem you would have to infer it, but it is a very good inferrence! thanks if you can review mine lol i really like all of your writings!
-phish2phish