for bike11/2/2003 c1 
8cramer
this was ok... not amazing, but its ok. It sort of conveys alot of emotions all at once. Keep writing... you'll get the hang of it...
8cramerthis was ok... not amazing, but its ok. It sort of conveys alot of emotions all at once. Keep writing... you'll get the hang of it...
7/22/2003 c1 74LadyAnesta
thats a really good poem... it reminds me of my first time riding without training wheels... it was very painful ;) great job :)
~Anesta
74LadyAnestathats a really good poem... it reminds me of my first time riding without training wheels... it was very painful ;) great job :)
~Anesta
6/9/2003 c1 20Once in a blue moon
I like the mental picture of this poem. I was just wondering what was the actually asignment for this poem? Since it was a non-ryhming (though there was some alliteration, intentional or not) it is a bit hard to hold together. Not to offend fat people or anything, but that's what poetry that doesn't ryhme is like if you don't do it perfectly. Fat people kinda stick out of their clothing funny.
So, the clothing is like the perfect non-ryhming poem. That's where everything fits perfectly. The sticky out bits of fat people are the parts that differ from the beat, because it doesn't quite fit right.
So, this poem is a bit chubby, if you understand now. Every once in a while the beat felt off.
Oh, and a book to suggest: "Sabriel" by Garth Nix. There are 2 more books after that as well. Veryveryvery good!
20Once in a blue moonI like the mental picture of this poem. I was just wondering what was the actually asignment for this poem? Since it was a non-ryhming (though there was some alliteration, intentional or not) it is a bit hard to hold together. Not to offend fat people or anything, but that's what poetry that doesn't ryhme is like if you don't do it perfectly. Fat people kinda stick out of their clothing funny.
So, the clothing is like the perfect non-ryhming poem. That's where everything fits perfectly. The sticky out bits of fat people are the parts that differ from the beat, because it doesn't quite fit right.
So, this poem is a bit chubby, if you understand now. Every once in a while the beat felt off.
Oh, and a book to suggest: "Sabriel" by Garth Nix. There are 2 more books after that as well. Veryveryvery good!
6/2/2003 c1 42Almost Infamous
Aww... My father is the only man in my life who can garentee he will always love me. No matter how many hissy fits I throw.
42Almost InfamousAww... My father is the only man in my life who can garentee he will always love me. No matter how many hissy fits I throw.
5/24/2003 c1 Dad
I remember the event very well! And I am glad you came back with your bloody knees...
I remember the event very well! And I am glad you came back with your bloody knees...
5/23/2003 c1 Frodo
Aww... I remember when I first learned how to ride my bike. It's so funny to look back on it. It's funny to look back on a lot of stuff I did when I was a kid. Nice work. Intresting way to write it. Keep it coming.
-Frodo
p.s Oh yes, I am very serious about killing Avril. She must die. She can't write or play guitar, and she knows it! The evil basterd! Trys to fool us, but no... we're too smart... just too smart. Yes, we must divise a plan to kill her.
Aww... I remember when I first learned how to ride my bike. It's so funny to look back on it. It's funny to look back on a lot of stuff I did when I was a kid. Nice work. Intresting way to write it. Keep it coming.
-Frodo
p.s Oh yes, I am very serious about killing Avril. She must die. She can't write or play guitar, and she knows it! The evil basterd! Trys to fool us, but no... we're too smart... just too smart. Yes, we must divise a plan to kill her.
5/23/2003 c1 106cosmo-queen
An original poem about an experience that we can all probably relate to, even though we might not remember it. Good poem, keep writing :)
*cosmo-queen*
106cosmo-queenAn original poem about an experience that we can all probably relate to, even though we might not remember it. Good poem, keep writing :)
*cosmo-queen*