for Love Me6/15/2003 c1 
2Apartment 666
remind me not to piss you off. Good poem, like all of yours I've read, keep up the writing!
2Apartment 666remind me not to piss you off. Good poem, like all of yours I've read, keep up the writing!
6/13/2003 c1 35Jane Austen the 2nd
Wow! Very serious and good stuff! it's amazing to read all of your great stuff! Also can you tell me how to put your poem "peaceful Day" on my favs list? I keep messing it up! Thanx LUv ya write more!
pretty pink:)
35Jane Austen the 2ndWow! Very serious and good stuff! it's amazing to read all of your great stuff! Also can you tell me how to put your poem "peaceful Day" on my favs list? I keep messing it up! Thanx LUv ya write more!
pretty pink:)
6/12/2003 c1 Odd Little Reviewer
Once again...Wow. Just...wow. Again you corner my feelings...Keep writing!
Once again...Wow. Just...wow. Again you corner my feelings...Keep writing!
6/1/2003 c1 2blinkie
this is wonderful! i really like it! these lines touched me the most:
"and if they were to tell me
the world was a beautiful place
i'd believe them
because they were my world
and they were beautiful"
it has a gloomy undertone to it that suits the words very well. however, i found the line "i will show you just how fast my mood can change" throws the flow off pace. I guess if it was revised/replaced with something less egocentric and a bit stronger, it would be even better. see, the preceding three lines set a mood of anticipation for the reader, and that line about the mood change does not live up to the anticipation. I do hope you understand what I mean to say. ^_^
take care and keep writing.
blinkie
2blinkiethis is wonderful! i really like it! these lines touched me the most:
"and if they were to tell me
the world was a beautiful place
i'd believe them
because they were my world
and they were beautiful"
it has a gloomy undertone to it that suits the words very well. however, i found the line "i will show you just how fast my mood can change" throws the flow off pace. I guess if it was revised/replaced with something less egocentric and a bit stronger, it would be even better. see, the preceding three lines set a mood of anticipation for the reader, and that line about the mood change does not live up to the anticipation. I do hope you understand what I mean to say. ^_^
take care and keep writing.
blinkie
6/1/2003 c1 301sirius chatham
Hm...very very good. I like it!
~Don't be a jerk
Read my work~
Why aren't you reading yet! Read now!
(that's propaganda, baby!)
Did I say I liked your poem? I did, it is v. good, I love the way it deals with the harms of this world...keep writing! *pokes* I said keep writing!
301sirius chathamHm...very very good. I like it!
~Don't be a jerk
Read my work~
Why aren't you reading yet! Read now!
(that's propaganda, baby!)
Did I say I liked your poem? I did, it is v. good, I love the way it deals with the harms of this world...keep writing! *pokes* I said keep writing!