Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for DNA Remix

11/24/2003 c1 Faewren Wolfstar
Ok, you have a fantastic idea. However, if there are 20 kids shipped up, 15 fall ill, and five die, you're left with 15. If ten then are shipped down, what happened to the other five? I'm a little lost, did I miss something?

Also, I agree with your other reviewer, you need to learn the difference between a war and a battle.

Much luck and I'll be checking back, 'cause I am interested!

Ani Wolfstar
6/4/2003 c1 2A. D. Mar
This is a very interesting beginning. Your timeline seems a bit off though. The timeline for your wars is awkward. If the Tiger Clan has seized Europe then war has not ended, they have just won that battle or that continent (like in Risk the game). You might want to familiarize yourself with military terminology or at least distinguish between wars and battles if they are going to be part of your story. I am intrigued and want to know what happened to those 5 children. Good start.

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service