for Emerald8/11/2003 c1 Loving-Wind
Whee! It's cool. o_o I like the plot! And from what Lidaen's mother will tell her seems like a very interesting (and intriguing!) conflict. Please continue it! ^_^
At the last part where the mother stutters, 'He-I-He' was really confusing... Maybe you could make it a little clearer? Because I can't tell if she's talking about the King, or her husband...
Oh, and this is Kristine :) Buwahaha. ^_^
Whee! It's cool. o_o I like the plot! And from what Lidaen's mother will tell her seems like a very interesting (and intriguing!) conflict. Please continue it! ^_^
At the last part where the mother stutters, 'He-I-He' was really confusing... Maybe you could make it a little clearer? Because I can't tell if she's talking about the King, or her husband...
Oh, and this is Kristine :) Buwahaha. ^_^
6/7/2003 c1 
7Wings of Dark
The mother's dialogue at the end isn't easy to read, since you use only one dash to denote pauses.
Other than that, an interesting idea. You put questions inside the reader's head.
Elisabeth
7Wings of DarkThe mother's dialogue at the end isn't easy to read, since you use only one dash to denote pauses.
Other than that, an interesting idea. You put questions inside the reader's head.
Elisabeth