7/2/2003 c1 220Namir Swiftpaw
That's not a haiku.

A haiku is a poem with three lines - the first one being 5 syllables, the second being 7, and the third being 5 again. You seem to be missing a third line all together, and the second line is ten syllables.

I guess it could be qualified as a couplet...but even then, it's really stretching it. A couplet is supposed to rhyme.

Anyway, this was nice, but I am not really seeing anything poetic about it. It's more like a profound statement.

Keep writing.

~Namir Swiftpaw