for Ice's Hearts2/27/2004 c9 
5Scarlett Olivia Smithinson
This story is good but I think you're more talented in the area of humor. My fav charicter would have to me Mia. I don't know why but your characters arn't very developed are they?
5Scarlett Olivia SmithinsonThis story is good but I think you're more talented in the area of humor. My fav charicter would have to me Mia. I don't know why but your characters arn't very developed are they?
2/27/2004 c7 Scarlett Olivia Smithinson
You really need a spell check (wow I always wanted to say that) Even I could tell. and that's very sad. On another note, a great place to get names is babynamer.com. I use it for most of my names and it's great.
You really need a spell check (wow I always wanted to say that) Even I could tell. and that's very sad. On another note, a great place to get names is babynamer.com. I use it for most of my names and it's great.
2/27/2004 c6 Scarlett Olivia Smithinson
It takes talent to smooth out that kind of plot in 2 chapters. good job.
It takes talent to smooth out that kind of plot in 2 chapters. good job.
1/7/2004 c13 A.E. Castleton
I finally got around to reading. It's very good. Your characters are well ironed and though you drop the reader in the middle of a new world with no background it's actually a better form of writing (IMO) than starting a whole new world from scratch for someone. It also makes it a lot more fun to read that way. Cedric is very kewl. I love his outlook on things and the thoughts he has. The rest of the characters are great. Kesler is my favorite so far. But he's a silly American like me. lol Great job. ^_^
I finally got around to reading. It's very good. Your characters are well ironed and though you drop the reader in the middle of a new world with no background it's actually a better form of writing (IMO) than starting a whole new world from scratch for someone. It also makes it a lot more fun to read that way. Cedric is very kewl. I love his outlook on things and the thoughts he has. The rest of the characters are great. Kesler is my favorite so far. But he's a silly American like me. lol Great job. ^_^
12/7/2003 c14 ZealWarrior
Hey, sorry for the long delayed review, I have been missing in action for too long-I forgot about this wonderful story only to return to eight new chapters!
As before, the story is progressing wonderfully. The part that deserves the most merit are the descriptions. I don't mean just of setting, I also mean how Cedric describes everyone's actions and the way they say something. The dialogue, though sparse, is quite believable and well worded. The plot is great! I like how the story is progressing and how the characters are being developed.
I personally thought Cedric is a little feminine, but that could be because of his personality or just that there just hasn't been enough told about him. Not really a problem though, all guys aren't macho.
Ohh, I also like the touch of military and "other" lingo, like the ratios and such and the costumes and different names-great stuff!
Sorry for not reading chapter 15 yet, I will, and that will be another review. :)
Anyway, great job, really, I do mean it. I've read only a few works on FictionPress that have this much quality, doubtless, you're one of the best writers on this site.
Oh and "Nah, ZealWarrior said something about ‘higher education,’..." -It doesn't mean I'm learning. :)
Hey, sorry for the long delayed review, I have been missing in action for too long-I forgot about this wonderful story only to return to eight new chapters!
As before, the story is progressing wonderfully. The part that deserves the most merit are the descriptions. I don't mean just of setting, I also mean how Cedric describes everyone's actions and the way they say something. The dialogue, though sparse, is quite believable and well worded. The plot is great! I like how the story is progressing and how the characters are being developed.
I personally thought Cedric is a little feminine, but that could be because of his personality or just that there just hasn't been enough told about him. Not really a problem though, all guys aren't macho.
Ohh, I also like the touch of military and "other" lingo, like the ratios and such and the costumes and different names-great stuff!
Sorry for not reading chapter 15 yet, I will, and that will be another review. :)
Anyway, great job, really, I do mean it. I've read only a few works on FictionPress that have this much quality, doubtless, you're one of the best writers on this site.
Oh and "Nah, ZealWarrior said something about ‘higher education,’..." -It doesn't mean I'm learning. :)
11/17/2003 c14 Snarks
Hey, sorry I didn't review the last chapter. Been busy I guess you could say. Anyway, poor Cedric. His fear of the military continues to amuse me. Especially after his musings about whether the military fears civvies. And I'm definately looking forward to more of this story. Keep up the good work.
mata ne!
Wootang
Hey, sorry I didn't review the last chapter. Been busy I guess you could say. Anyway, poor Cedric. His fear of the military continues to amuse me. Especially after his musings about whether the military fears civvies. And I'm definately looking forward to more of this story. Keep up the good work.
mata ne!
Wootang
10/28/2003 c14 77ForgottenMists
Teehee, I love your little A/N conversations. Quite silly. Anyway, Cedric sounds quite like a guy, though somehow he doesn't exactly sound British. Not sure why... One thing, for some odd, reason, it sounded to my muddle of a brain like it was Toril who had an accident, not her second in command. Then I figured that that's not possible, and it made sense. I don't know why I thought that, but it is highly likely that it was just my strange little mind, not the writing. Ah well. Very very good chapter, as usual.
77ForgottenMistsTeehee, I love your little A/N conversations. Quite silly. Anyway, Cedric sounds quite like a guy, though somehow he doesn't exactly sound British. Not sure why... One thing, for some odd, reason, it sounded to my muddle of a brain like it was Toril who had an accident, not her second in command. Then I figured that that's not possible, and it made sense. I don't know why I thought that, but it is highly likely that it was just my strange little mind, not the writing. Ah well. Very very good chapter, as usual.
10/26/2003 c14 000000000000000000000
Favorite character? Kesler. Why? "Damn the Wright Brothers." He's going to be the funny one. I'm partial to the funny ones. And he has a good name. And his last name makes me want to sing some Simon & Garfunkel. "And here's to you, Kesler Robinson..." Ah...
Keep up the good work.
Cedric doesn't sound like a woman. He's fine. He's intelligent and reserved, but not effeminate.
Favorite character? Kesler. Why? "Damn the Wright Brothers." He's going to be the funny one. I'm partial to the funny ones. And he has a good name. And his last name makes me want to sing some Simon & Garfunkel. "And here's to you, Kesler Robinson..." Ah...
Keep up the good work.
Cedric doesn't sound like a woman. He's fine. He's intelligent and reserved, but not effeminate.
10/23/2003 c13 ForgottenMists
Uniforms sound good, if uncomfortable. But then that is el punto. V sorry did not review sooner, but stupid internet has not been letting me stay on for long lately. Ugh. Ah well. Anyway, good chappie. Muchly goodly. Cannot wait to see where el twisto will take us.
Uniforms sound good, if uncomfortable. But then that is el punto. V sorry did not review sooner, but stupid internet has not been letting me stay on for long lately. Ugh. Ah well. Anyway, good chappie. Muchly goodly. Cannot wait to see where el twisto will take us.
10/19/2003 c13 26Aloh Dark
Cool chapt. The uniforms sound uncomfortable. Fit like gloves? No thanks! Give me something loose and airy! LOL.
Can't wait for more!
26Aloh DarkCool chapt. The uniforms sound uncomfortable. Fit like gloves? No thanks! Give me something loose and airy! LOL.
Can't wait for more!
10/15/2003 c12 Aloh Dark
Sorry it's taken me a while to read all the chapters from my last review. I've been super busy and ah! But I'm soo glad that I had this to read! AH! I loved it! It's awesome! Keep it up! And get the next chapter out soon! Please?
Sorry it's taken me a while to read all the chapters from my last review. I've been super busy and ah! But I'm soo glad that I had this to read! AH! I loved it! It's awesome! Keep it up! And get the next chapter out soon! Please?
10/10/2003 c12 000000000000000000000
Hey. Thanks for reviewing my story. I appreciate it. Thought I'd return the favor. ;)
This feels like it's really heading somewhere. You've got a believable world created. I like the massive unions. Characters are still in the development process, it seems, but they all have very distinct personalities, which is good. No mixing. I'm very interested to see what you do with this. And what happens on Antarctica! :)
Thanks again.
Hey. Thanks for reviewing my story. I appreciate it. Thought I'd return the favor. ;)
This feels like it's really heading somewhere. You've got a believable world created. I like the massive unions. Characters are still in the development process, it seems, but they all have very distinct personalities, which is good. No mixing. I'm very interested to see what you do with this. And what happens on Antarctica! :)
Thanks again.