for Sonnet of Lies11/27/2003 c1 
23Platypi
Wow. This is really impressive. I've tried writing sonnets before, and although you didn't stick to iambic pentameter, you kept to a none-too-easy rhyme scheme.
In addition, you express a feeling so cleverly, using imagery and exploring the manifestations of your subject thoroughly.
Your word play also is delicious: "The soft embrace of love, a loveless con"
You too like the phrase about the flies, I see :-D
You were right to use "gave" instead of the proper "given", it sounds wonderful. If only there was something you could do with "Never shall I regain the things I've lost," which has emphasis on irregular syllables.
Lack of punctuation doesn't feel right for a sonnet and is confusing in some of the more complex lines.
23PlatypiWow. This is really impressive. I've tried writing sonnets before, and although you didn't stick to iambic pentameter, you kept to a none-too-easy rhyme scheme.
In addition, you express a feeling so cleverly, using imagery and exploring the manifestations of your subject thoroughly.
Your word play also is delicious: "The soft embrace of love, a loveless con"
You too like the phrase about the flies, I see :-D
You were right to use "gave" instead of the proper "given", it sounds wonderful. If only there was something you could do with "Never shall I regain the things I've lost," which has emphasis on irregular syllables.
Lack of punctuation doesn't feel right for a sonnet and is confusing in some of the more complex lines.