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for Sonnet of Lies

11/27/2003 c1 23Platypi
Wow. This is really impressive. I've tried writing sonnets before, and although you didn't stick to iambic pentameter, you kept to a none-too-easy rhyme scheme.
In addition, you express a feeling so cleverly, using imagery and exploring the manifestations of your subject thoroughly.
Your word play also is delicious: "The soft embrace of love, a loveless con"
You too like the phrase about the flies, I see :-D
You were right to use "gave" instead of the proper "given", it sounds wonderful. If only there was something you could do with "Never shall I regain the things I've lost," which has emphasis on irregular syllables.
Lack of punctuation doesn't feel right for a sonnet and is confusing in some of the more complex lines.

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