for We Were12/6/2003 c1 wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
This is pretty good. It seems a little too succint, especially in the climax – you might want to describe the main character observing the mission in a more drawn-out, narrative way. There's not much more to say. For being only about a page long, it's a really good story.
Trivial grammar correction: "Semi permanent" should be hyphenated.
This is pretty good. It seems a little too succint, especially in the climax – you might want to describe the main character observing the mission in a more drawn-out, narrative way. There's not much more to say. For being only about a page long, it's a really good story.
Trivial grammar correction: "Semi permanent" should be hyphenated.
9/29/2003 c1 
77ForgottenMists
Ep! Yes, this definitely fits in the tragedy category. Quite sad. It has helped to put me in one of those moods, where you mourn all the ways things used to be. Before that I was mourning how you and me are about the only two left of the original four from the Hallivanian Adventure. Photon and Acey have sort of faded away.
Anyway, I love the story. BTW, you're on my author alert list, and another BTW, I am almost done with chapter six of FLoB, if you want to read it soon, I only need to type up about another page.
77ForgottenMistsEp! Yes, this definitely fits in the tragedy category. Quite sad. It has helped to put me in one of those moods, where you mourn all the ways things used to be. Before that I was mourning how you and me are about the only two left of the original four from the Hallivanian Adventure. Photon and Acey have sort of faded away.
Anyway, I love the story. BTW, you're on my author alert list, and another BTW, I am almost done with chapter six of FLoB, if you want to read it soon, I only need to type up about another page.