6/2/2004 c1 57NeWriter
The subject is a little weird yet quite original.
However, I think that there were some lines which didn't sound right in the poem. Like... "all you've gotta do is love me, baby baby please."
I mean... for starters, that line doesn't encourage your writing here since it isn't descriptive or anything; it's rather as if you were talking or trying to make a song. Maybe you could do something else that's rather more descriptive, write about the scenery in which this person is in or what she's thinking in her head, stuff like that.
I think this could be a song rather than a poem but it was ok all the same. The subject was good though!

12/25/2003 c1 2Della C
Cute, in a stalkerish kind of way. Very well written. ^_^
there's been a mostly blessed update, by the way.

10/8/2003 c1 daddymonkeys
well I'M won.

10/7/2003 c1 35waterlilypad
purty.