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10/31/2005 c6 Sally-andersonn
This was kinda strange. THIs is turning more quieter and tormented.
10/28/2005 c4 Sally-andersonn
This is ral dark. The first person seemed to be pwerful at the beginnig and thenyou gradually show the weaknesses. I can't really commetn on this. It's so individual.
10/28/2005 c3 Sally-andersonn
This is really dark. Dark dark dark stuff. it's fantastically good though.
10/28/2005 c2 Sally-andersonn
Your slowly building up the tension of it. Though it is slow moving it does not bore me.
10/28/2005 c1 Sally-andersonn
Okay. it has this strangely calm view of mudering someone. I think it's cool because it is told form the point of a psychopath. Good chap.
1/6/2005 c1 Cyn
Great story so far. The Hannibal Lector elements made for an uneasy, but fascinating reading. I can't really say anything about Aiden's character at this point, because he's just been introduced into the story. His personality will come out following his interractions with the serial killer. Another thing I would like to add is I hope this story can have a relatively happy ending, that is that the killer will not win in the end.
12/15/2004 c1 1Maddox Grey
Unfortunately Mackenzie, fictionpress does not allow me to space things the way I want to. But I have bolded and titled my notes and the end of each chapter, so hopefully, that helps sort out confusion.
11/15/2004 c4 49Jadah Krayne
Wow...this story is incredible. The description is wonderful, and the story line is very interesting. Almost pity the guy for being lonely...almost. I wasn't sure what I expected when someone recommended the story to me, but I am thoroughly impressed. I love how your killer is male and hunting males, not your stereotypical killer, which makes the story more interesting. Can't wait to see what you do with it. Keep writing!
10/29/2004 c4 32Mackenzie Anderson
A little confusing, but makes me want to read more already. May I offer one suggestion? At the end, when you put your comment, could you differentiate with a few dashes or something? I was so into reading it took me a moment to realize it was an author's note.
10/29/2004 c3 Mackenzie Anderson
Continuing in its beauty... a few minor grammatical problems, but other than that... again, so disturbing but so grimly fascinating that I can't stop reading. I think you've captured a sociopath's nature perfectly, as he displays no emotion about killing, and sees no wrong, only pleasure, in his actions.
10/29/2004 c1 Mackenzie Anderson
Highly, highly disturbing, but at the same time, highly intriguing. It's rather interesting seeing things from the other side, and this has caught my interest like nothing has in quite some time. I'm tempted to print it out and show it to another of my writer friends. I am -very- impressed. You are a talented writer, and the amount of detail is perfect. Any more detail and I'd worry. =^.^=
9/28/2004 c3 5Megan LaVey
wow...you can write! that is very good. i will not say anything mean, because i liked it. Your reviews really help me. people are starting to read my stuff because there are 9 reviews for "Pogo". By the, Stepphen, was cowriten with a friend! Loved your story!
6/14/2004 c3 33Walk Backwards
This character strikes me as a modern Jack the Ripper... I don't know if that has already been pointed out, or if that was your intention, but thats my take. Very nice.
5/27/2004 c3 wazawaisuru
Oh! You updated! I'm really glad, because this story is absolutely beautiful and brilliant. Your storytelling skills are excellent and your descriptions are utterly exquisite. Keep writing on this, please!
4/27/2004 c2 52Tiriel Sapharious
Three questions, if he is so worried about his appearence before heading out would he not have a shower first as well?
Where does he get the money from to afford such an upscale place and all of the furniture?
If he ritualistically makes his bed, yet say refrains from doing so in order to eat first, such as he did, would he not do so before leaving the house?
Other then that, really good work, again I ask how can you write so well, can I mooch some of your abilities temporarily to improve upon my god-awful work that is crap, very well written and don't slack off I'm hoping for the next chapter.
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