for Not What It Seems2/18/2006 c17 tammy
a definite suspence i think lolcant w8 2 read da next bit
a definite suspence i think lolcant w8 2 read da next bit
2/16/2006 c17 
5Attache
Hi new reader!This is going so well and funny too ^^ I guess it'll be awhile till you can post again huh? *sighs* and things are just starting to get with Chris! Please updated soon!
5AttacheHi new reader!This is going so well and funny too ^^ I guess it'll be awhile till you can post again huh? *sighs* and things are just starting to get with Chris! Please updated soon!
2/15/2006 c17 17Isa The Great
Oh my god! I about cried when the main character found out her friend bailed out! This is such a great story!Can't wait to find out whats going to happen next for Al. ( i'm not going to bother trying to spell any names ) Chris is so kewl ( ok, any name besides chris, i like a guy named chris and i know i can spell it! ) update soon!Karmen
17Isa The GreatOh my god! I about cried when the main character found out her friend bailed out! This is such a great story!Can't wait to find out whats going to happen next for Al. ( i'm not going to bother trying to spell any names ) Chris is so kewl ( ok, any name besides chris, i like a guy named chris and i know i can spell it! ) update soon!Karmen
2/12/2006 c17 dark-rosette
PLEASE UPDATE. THIS IS REALLY REALLY REALLY GOOD STORY. AND THE PLOT IS LIKE JUST STARTING WITH THE MOTORCYCLE GUY AND CHRIS FINDING OUT ABOUT ALLISA. PLEASE UPDATE. THIS IS [IN MY OPINION] ONE OF THE BEST STORIES I'VE READ ON HERE ON FP. SO UPDATE PLEASE...
PLEASE UPDATE. THIS IS REALLY REALLY REALLY GOOD STORY. AND THE PLOT IS LIKE JUST STARTING WITH THE MOTORCYCLE GUY AND CHRIS FINDING OUT ABOUT ALLISA. PLEASE UPDATE. THIS IS [IN MY OPINION] ONE OF THE BEST STORIES I'VE READ ON HERE ON FP. SO UPDATE PLEASE...
2/9/2006 c16 Kythia
I read your profile, and retwurned to make a comment!
Yay for Christians! I am, as well, a devout believer in the Lord, and have read Purpose Driven Life. May I reccomend to you the books "When God Writes your Love Story," as well as "Authentic Beauty" and any other books written by the authors, Leslie and Eric Ludy. They are brillant, God filled people, and their books are amazing and Life changing...
Do you really live in the Phillipines? I think that is so cool! I did not even know that they have private schools over there, let along Christian private schools! I think it would be fun to live in a country I could be bi-lingual in, which, for me, would have to be a Spanish speaking country, or a Latin speaking one! (Lol for the Latin speaking countries...that no longer exist!)
Well, that is all. I just wanted to say *ah* Christian on Fictionpress!
I love your story that I reviewed!
Bye!
~Kythia
I read your profile, and retwurned to make a comment!
Yay for Christians! I am, as well, a devout believer in the Lord, and have read Purpose Driven Life. May I reccomend to you the books "When God Writes your Love Story," as well as "Authentic Beauty" and any other books written by the authors, Leslie and Eric Ludy. They are brillant, God filled people, and their books are amazing and Life changing...
Do you really live in the Phillipines? I think that is so cool! I did not even know that they have private schools over there, let along Christian private schools! I think it would be fun to live in a country I could be bi-lingual in, which, for me, would have to be a Spanish speaking country, or a Latin speaking one! (Lol for the Latin speaking countries...that no longer exist!)
Well, that is all. I just wanted to say *ah* Christian on Fictionpress!
I love your story that I reviewed!
Bye!
~Kythia
2/9/2006 c17 Kythia
Hello!
Great story you have going here! Realy great plot and really well developed characters.
I liked this chapter alot. I hate terry's replacement already though. She bugs the crap out of me.
I hope that you update soon! (at least, sooner than the 6 months like last time, lol)
Until the next update,
~Kythia
Hello!
Great story you have going here! Realy great plot and really well developed characters.
I liked this chapter alot. I hate terry's replacement already though. She bugs the crap out of me.
I hope that you update soon! (at least, sooner than the 6 months like last time, lol)
Until the next update,
~Kythia
2/6/2006 c17 14Grape
*laughs* I liked how you did the end chaper..just kidding. Nice. It was a great chapter..and about time you posted! Jeesh! Anyways...awsomeness! Hope the next chapter is posted soon.
14Grape*laughs* I liked how you did the end chaper..just kidding. Nice. It was a great chapter..and about time you posted! Jeesh! Anyways...awsomeness! Hope the next chapter is posted soon.
2/5/2006 c17 Pbum aka Spoon and Fork
Hi, I’m a new reader here. I liked your concept and all but I couldn’t help but rant about something, specifically your bodyguard/ undercover/ CIA.
Is it just me or your image of a bodyguard is flawed? There were instances in your chapters that Terry wasn’t doing her job as a bodyguard. Instead of sticking with Alissa 24/7, she had to leave her most of the times. Yeah, I do get that she had to report to her supervisor but that doesn’t mean she had to leave her client. I mean what kind of CIA agent does that? We are talking about protecting the life of a billionaire kid here. She couldn’t leave her defenseless even if Alissa was in disguise. And dude, aren’t CIA people / bodyguards supposed to have weapons like guns? How are you going to protect your client unarmed? No wonder Alissa got hit by a motorcycle with Terry doing nothing. God, that motorcycle incident was frustrating.
And now it will be taken over by a 12 year old kid? That’s ridiculous. Yeah, it’s cute like Spy Kids cute but still, it’s ridiculous. Hell, Alissa almost died. What she needed is a tight security not a little girl who could do what Terry does. Come on, Terry sucked at her job!
Sorry if it looked like I flamed your story here but I just thought it will be more believable if your character will play the part of what they’re supposed to be. I know it’s a cliché story but at least make it somewhat real.
I’ll recommend a story here in fictionpress where you could somehow get an idea on bodyguards and stuff. In the Eye of the Tiger by Ameliebabie. Samantha by Mystified.
Hi, I’m a new reader here. I liked your concept and all but I couldn’t help but rant about something, specifically your bodyguard/ undercover/ CIA.
Is it just me or your image of a bodyguard is flawed? There were instances in your chapters that Terry wasn’t doing her job as a bodyguard. Instead of sticking with Alissa 24/7, she had to leave her most of the times. Yeah, I do get that she had to report to her supervisor but that doesn’t mean she had to leave her client. I mean what kind of CIA agent does that? We are talking about protecting the life of a billionaire kid here. She couldn’t leave her defenseless even if Alissa was in disguise. And dude, aren’t CIA people / bodyguards supposed to have weapons like guns? How are you going to protect your client unarmed? No wonder Alissa got hit by a motorcycle with Terry doing nothing. God, that motorcycle incident was frustrating.
And now it will be taken over by a 12 year old kid? That’s ridiculous. Yeah, it’s cute like Spy Kids cute but still, it’s ridiculous. Hell, Alissa almost died. What she needed is a tight security not a little girl who could do what Terry does. Come on, Terry sucked at her job!
Sorry if it looked like I flamed your story here but I just thought it will be more believable if your character will play the part of what they’re supposed to be. I know it’s a cliché story but at least make it somewhat real.
I’ll recommend a story here in fictionpress where you could somehow get an idea on bodyguards and stuff. In the Eye of the Tiger by Ameliebabie. Samantha by Mystified.
2/5/2006 c17 C. Aleshi
Oh! I knew that experience... I had to move a lot of times... For my dad's work and stuff. Glad you're back on writing!
It's so sad that Terry decides to drop the mission... and that kid Kelly takes on it. A kid! 12 years old! It's pretty hilarious though.. =)
UPDATE! ^V^
Oh! I knew that experience... I had to move a lot of times... For my dad's work and stuff. Glad you're back on writing!
It's so sad that Terry decides to drop the mission... and that kid Kelly takes on it. A kid! 12 years old! It's pretty hilarious though.. =)
UPDATE! ^V^
2/4/2006 c17 1Dirty Secret
You UPDATED! Awesome. Superb chapter and UPDATE SOON!(Try not to take 6 months ;)
1Dirty SecretYou UPDATED! Awesome. Superb chapter and UPDATE SOON!(Try not to take 6 months ;)
2/4/2006 c17 1kittybro
Greg really does suck.. Will is cute.. don't make him evil XD. ANd seriously the break in the midst of such suspense in the middle(ish) was mean... very very mean +D
1kittybroGreg really does suck.. Will is cute.. don't make him evil XD. ANd seriously the break in the midst of such suspense in the middle(ish) was mean... very very mean +D
2/4/2006 c17 ellabella
...MORE! Please. I never forget about this story, I didn't need the recaps. It was one of the first I ever read on FP. And now you've updated. I want more. :D
~Ellabella.
...MORE! Please. I never forget about this story, I didn't need the recaps. It was one of the first I ever read on FP. And now you've updated. I want more. :D
~Ellabella.
2/3/2006 c17 d r e a m z z
this story is really good!update soon! cant wait to read the next chapter. :)
this story is really good!update soon! cant wait to read the next chapter. :)