for Revealed1/2/2004 c1 The Black Rider
Well written as always, but this poem was a bit too long. After a while, you had established what you were trying to convey to your audience, and just repeated it over and over again. It was still really good, just long.
BTW, have you ever listened to The Smiths? I've gotten into them recently and for some reason your poetry has been reminding me a lot of their music. They're cool because their melodies are really catchy but the lyrics are extremely morbid and much like this. Check them out sometime, and keep writing.
Well written as always, but this poem was a bit too long. After a while, you had established what you were trying to convey to your audience, and just repeated it over and over again. It was still really good, just long.
BTW, have you ever listened to The Smiths? I've gotten into them recently and for some reason your poetry has been reminding me a lot of their music. They're cool because their melodies are really catchy but the lyrics are extremely morbid and much like this. Check them out sometime, and keep writing.
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