for Jailed4/18/2004 c1 traylin
I'm sorry, I have no critique, just an understanding : )
I'm sorry, I have no critique, just an understanding : )
1/25/2004 c1 
6Tatterdemalion
Wow. I love it - the writing flowed brilliantly without distracting you from the images (and what bitter and striking images they are!). I especially like the last line as it just seemed to capture that simplistic and powerless feel of the piece...
6TatterdemalionWow. I love it - the writing flowed brilliantly without distracting you from the images (and what bitter and striking images they are!). I especially like the last line as it just seemed to capture that simplistic and powerless feel of the piece...
1/19/2004 c1 4darkperversion
i have been going through all of your stuff and i just keep getting more and mroe impressed. you are very talented
4darkperversioni have been going through all of your stuff and i just keep getting more and mroe impressed. you are very talented
1/5/2004 c1 80Plato's Optic Runaway
oh...I hardly know what to say...(not that a lack of diction is an uncommon occurance with me). Damn. It's imposing, enchanting with its twisted complexity. Nice.
80Plato's Optic Runawayoh...I hardly know what to say...(not that a lack of diction is an uncommon occurance with me). Damn. It's imposing, enchanting with its twisted complexity. Nice.
1/4/2004 c1 48Sun Chime
I love the metallic tang you've given to the poem, and the concept is really cool. It's actually true you know, being bound by commitment, that is. Great work, on the whole. And, btw, thanks for the review.
48Sun ChimeI love the metallic tang you've given to the poem, and the concept is really cool. It's actually true you know, being bound by commitment, that is. Great work, on the whole. And, btw, thanks for the review.
12/27/2003 c1 127godawful teen-angst poetry
Oh! How intriguing...I love love the last line. Metallic lust...what a concept to ponder.
~lyv
127godawful teen-angst poetryOh! How intriguing...I love love the last line. Metallic lust...what a concept to ponder.
~lyv
12/25/2003 c1 8glitterjewele
intriguing, and also disturbing ~ almost has that futuristic inhuman tinge to it, but not quite. interesting and original way to depict love [corrupted]. good parallel with 'metallic' and 'mechanical.' loved the "garden of the jailed lovers" line. awesome work. :)
8glitterjeweleintriguing, and also disturbing ~ almost has that futuristic inhuman tinge to it, but not quite. interesting and original way to depict love [corrupted]. good parallel with 'metallic' and 'mechanical.' loved the "garden of the jailed lovers" line. awesome work. :)