for III Experimental Love11/28/2006 c3 
199Saeger
*laughs* Wow... gotta love the randomness... Kinda scary, but amusing nonetheless. Some great remarks in there...
199Saeger*laughs* Wow... gotta love the randomness... Kinda scary, but amusing nonetheless. Some great remarks in there...
9/4/2006 c6 Sharpieyum
Haha, you actually updated this? Nice!6 chapters out in three years, not bad!
Anyway, some grammatical errors but much, much better on the spelling. ^.~ I'm not sure if you're using Microsoft Word, but you've got to love the little green squiggly's.
I felt like I was reading The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Universe all over again though...
Tomorrow, school again! Whoo!
Lots of loveliness,~Sharpieyum
Haha, you actually updated this? Nice!6 chapters out in three years, not bad!
Anyway, some grammatical errors but much, much better on the spelling. ^.~ I'm not sure if you're using Microsoft Word, but you've got to love the little green squiggly's.
I felt like I was reading The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Universe all over again though...
Tomorrow, school again! Whoo!
Lots of loveliness,~Sharpieyum
2/8/2004 c3 25rootin4philly
Err...GET A SPELLCHECKER RACHEL! I beg thee! I beseach thee! (Don't comment on my Shakespearian grammar/spelling or even my spelling of the word of the time period I am speaking) (If that made sense, God bless you and give me your brain) Um...what is with the making out? I am, again, completely confused. I thought they were old friends. What is with the little author interlude that isn't set off from the regular story? I am utterly confused.
25rootin4phillyErr...GET A SPELLCHECKER RACHEL! I beg thee! I beseach thee! (Don't comment on my Shakespearian grammar/spelling or even my spelling of the word of the time period I am speaking) (If that made sense, God bless you and give me your brain) Um...what is with the making out? I am, again, completely confused. I thought they were old friends. What is with the little author interlude that isn't set off from the regular story? I am utterly confused.
2/8/2004 c2 rootin4philly
Erm, okay, a little more description in this one. It might not be a good idea to use actual names of people. Change 'em slightly, that way you avoid lawsuits! (I'm talking from experience) (Err...just kidding!) I'm still really confused. I have no idea where the plot is heading, or where the plot is. All I know is that there is some dialogue and a girl with a crush on a guy. Other than that, I'm lost. Please clarify by adding A LOT of description.
Erm, okay, a little more description in this one. It might not be a good idea to use actual names of people. Change 'em slightly, that way you avoid lawsuits! (I'm talking from experience) (Err...just kidding!) I'm still really confused. I have no idea where the plot is heading, or where the plot is. All I know is that there is some dialogue and a girl with a crush on a guy. Other than that, I'm lost. Please clarify by adding A LOT of description.
2/8/2004 c1 rootin4philly
Er...2 seconds into this I'm already completely confused. I have no idea what the people are talking about. I caught something about a hot guy but that's about it. It might help if you added description because I don't have a very good idea of the characters. I just know their names. If you want a good story you need well-developed characters, so far, this story is lacking the well-developed part.
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I know that was harsh but it had to be said, I was getting annoyed. If you aren't too upset with me and my review, feel free to review some of my stuff. You know who I am...the stalker that wasn't a stalker
Er...2 seconds into this I'm already completely confused. I have no idea what the people are talking about. I caught something about a hot guy but that's about it. It might help if you added description because I don't have a very good idea of the characters. I just know their names. If you want a good story you need well-developed characters, so far, this story is lacking the well-developed part.
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I know that was harsh but it had to be said, I was getting annoyed. If you aren't too upset with me and my review, feel free to review some of my stuff. You know who I am...the stalker that wasn't a stalker
1/31/2004 c4 Silver
Haha. You're welcome. You have some problems with punctuations, don't you? You should seriously get a patent on the RACHEL SPELLCHECKER. Really! At least your character in my story is not the character who was really stupid...whose name I have forgotten. Not good.
Haha. You're welcome. You have some problems with punctuations, don't you? You should seriously get a patent on the RACHEL SPELLCHECKER. Really! At least your character in my story is not the character who was really stupid...whose name I have forgotten. Not good.
1/17/2004 c3 Silver Indigo Sky
Rachel and Naomi? Come on, you can do better than that! The Rachel spell checker, I see, has infected this story - threw should be through, miss programmed should be misprogrammed, and you're missing verbs in some sentences, with other things. But thats ok, cause I know you're CATONTHEGO GOODS! Hahahaha!
Rachel and Naomi? Come on, you can do better than that! The Rachel spell checker, I see, has infected this story - threw should be through, miss programmed should be misprogrammed, and you're missing verbs in some sentences, with other things. But thats ok, cause I know you're CATONTHEGO GOODS! Hahahaha!
1/13/2004 c3 11M.D. Cantine
This is funny. I like it, but there are a lot of grammar errors. I would suggest a beta reader. I'd be glad to beta and go through your stories before you put them up here.
By the way, the Soap Opera has a new chapter up.
11M.D. CantineThis is funny. I like it, but there are a lot of grammar errors. I would suggest a beta reader. I'd be glad to beta and go through your stories before you put them up here.
By the way, the Soap Opera has a new chapter up.
12/22/2003 c1 M.D. Cantine
I don't get it. The story kind of trails away into nothingness, and unless this is longer than just this one shot it's seemingly pointless. Punctuation is off in several places.
Don't be unduly worried by my constructive critisim. This story could shape up nicely if you work on it a little.
I don't get it. The story kind of trails away into nothingness, and unless this is longer than just this one shot it's seemingly pointless. Punctuation is off in several places.
Don't be unduly worried by my constructive critisim. This story could shape up nicely if you work on it a little.