Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for The Night of the Octopus

5/24/2006 c1 1rrmehta364
"On the hottest night of Summer," : Don't think its necessary to capitalize the 'summer'

"Which was true but no more comforting for all that." : For all that doesn't seem necessary.

Random Trivia: Cephelapods (the group of animals octopus belong to) are said to have the most powerful eyes out of animals.

More Random Trivia: Octopus's are the most intelligent invertibrates. As smart as the average housecat.

The end of the story seemed a bit rushed, and not fully explained. The last lines were really funny though.

Looking forward to readnig more.

-goodbye.
5/15/2006 c1 13Tsumujikaze no Soujutsu
Hi there! Thanks for your review, friend! It really made my day! ^^ Anyway, on with the review. Ok, I can really say that this story's quite interesting although I admit the part where the octopus disappeared was a bit creepy. Anyway, like the conversation. It's very well done IMO. Anyway, good story again. I do think the moral of the story is a bit funny in a certain sense...
5/6/2006 c1 2temblance
wow. That was an interesting little story, maybe one of the most effective shorts I have read in awhile. It got me interested into the characters and events with little notice and the ending felt like the story was still open. There is one sentence that seemed a little iffy:

"A purply glitter attached itself to their fingertips that took some shifting"

shifting of what? maybe this is just an error on my part, but I didn't think that this sentence made sense.

other than that- really great job with this! the last two sentences were priceless.
5/2/2006 c1 3Blah246
Haha, a quaint little story. I can imagine how it'll look, five stories tall with a big "O" for a mouth, lolz. A nice little short, it was fun to read.

Hmm... I'll keep that bit about prosperity in mind.
5/2/2006 c1 20Pheobe Meryll
Hello! Thanks for your review on my story. I'm glad you like it...I am starting a new one I'd rather get feedback on if you're interested, but I appreciate either way. :)

"It just turned up!""Yes," said Paul. "After we built it." lol that's awesome. this whole situation is so totally random.

"shut-up" well I don't think you needed the dash...

I liked those few ending lines...the pessimistic shopokeeper and the words about prosperity. I think that if I thought about it enough, I could see an allegory in this. At any rate it was quite entertaining and well-written. Do keep writing!
3/28/2005 c1 8Neapon
LOL I love this, its so silly(in a good way). I can't really see anything wrong with it, unless maybe adding more detail. It might be nice to know just how big the octopus is. It would be cool if you could write more shortstories like this. It could be a kind of 'weird stuff happening in a little town'. Anyways good job.
1/15/2005 c1 18Gemema
Hehe, cool fic Katie! I love the deviant-looking purple octopuss! Brilliant! ^_^
9/16/2004 c1 1The baava Project
Hello, Buneater! You were kind enough to leave me a review a while back, and I finally have some time to myself to return the favor. ^_^;;
And, oh my, I'm glad I did. I got some GOOD giggles out of this. Lisa is a GREAT character.
Nitpick: [On the hottest night of Summer, a kind of aimless madness] ~ Why is "summer" capitalized? English only does that for proper nouns . . . ^_~
[The fact is, nobody can quite remember what happened that night but in the morning, there was the octopus and they must have built it, mustn't they?] ~ heehee
["It's hideous, I said. "It's all sort of sticky looking. And I don't like the look in its eyes.] ~ *giggle*
[It sat in a little square over the presenter's shoulder, leering in its purple way.] ~ Oh help! So droll . . . I love it!
[A purply glitter attached itself to their fingertips that took some shifting.] ~ that took some . . . shifting? Why don't I get what you're trying to say there?
[It's not some creature from the {depths} come to possess us."] ~ That's just a suggestion, for "deeps" didn't sound quite right to me.
[New shops opened selling purple velvet dresses and candles whose deviant shapes attracted my fiance immediately.] ~ That's a good line. ^_^
I loved this! Wonderful! Wonderful, pointless, and funny, with a hint of mysterious horror. This piece was a very good diversion for me!
ja ne,
LoK
8/29/2004 c1 4bfmusashi
interesting story, nonetheless...this attracted my attention and while its short, you get the point across nicely. i like how you write-everything is nicely compacted together, everything works well, and all of your words are laced with a sort of parody that fills this entire piece. good stuff...yea, the line about the toilet paper is oh-so-true.
5/9/2004 c1 Earthsong12
Sorry, don’t feel like logging in. This is a cute story, I like it! I would definitely be in the crowd of octopus-worshippers. I love octopi! *beam*
1/26/2004 c1 32Morbane
Very polished. The best bit, I think, is the dialogue with Paul. Very sharp, and the logic-at-cross-purposes is well done. The plot is a little predictable, but there's an element of parody in this so I suspect you don't mind. And a 'box' of sneakers? That gives rise to alarm. What WERE those octopii up to?
1/24/2004 c1 mistressfishie
Wow...that was really spiffy...I love octopuses. And the story just had a sort of Douglas Adams-like touch. ^^ Nice job!
1/23/2004 c1 1aalewis
I was cruising around fictionpress minding my own buisness when this story caught my eye. Very freaky. Very crazy. Very weird. But hey, I like stuff out of the ordinary, so this suited me perfectly.
Very funny though too. I mean, just the idea of a giant purple octopus leering at me over the newsreaders sholder makes me crack up.
1/23/2004 c1 psycho tabby cat
hahaha
Very very weird.
but funny
Where on erth do you come up with that sort of stuff.*grin
1/23/2004 c1 54Werecat99
I liked that. A bit creepy around the edges but funny nonetheless.
I'd like to see more from Lisa's dislike and protests against the octopus, though.
Glad to see you post again.
16 Page 1 2 Next »

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service