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4/10/2004 c1 7ubercognito
Pchh, verbal communication is pretty important. I mean, kissing and holding hands and such is great, but talking's pretty good, too. Note that I have no idea what I'm talking about.
Next time, bash the husband. The whole thing about women being seen/not heard pisses me off and while that probably wasn't your intent...it came off like that a bit. Trust me, the patriarchy can take a beating.
3/12/2004 c1 9Magentian
*grins* This is what poetry is meant to sound like. The couplets, contrary to whatever that unutterable down there said, work here... and the overall effect reminds me irresistably of Shell Silverstein. Same kind of rhyme scheme and rhythm. My only peeve is the "even" before "now too complex" in the third line from the bottom, which skews the beat of it a little. Tres bon.
2/17/2004 c1 22Turtle Queen of Freeks
Wierd.
2/15/2004 c1 2Draconian Phoenix
wow! you rhymed and there was rhythem! i like it, very true statement about out world where althogh communication is essential it is also deadly. the word dwells could have been used without the plural.
2/4/2004 c1 orangefreak33
I really liked it, the rhyme works and doesn't seem forced.
The last 4 lines made me laugh.
2/4/2004 c1 1Formerly
A bit of advice: Rather than looking for meaningless rhymes, write something sensical. Or blank verse (rhymes are sincerely overrated).
2/3/2004 c1 2nl1
That was a good and smart poem.
2/3/2004 c1 misau37
very nice! i like the last line!
2/3/2004 c1 1Liquid Ice Maiden
This is great! I love the Two end lines, I'm gonna read the rest of your stuff...
~KIU~
**Liquid**
2/3/2004 c1 251LegendaryPunk29
One thing to say, GREAT poem! I truly loved it! wat an awsome poem uve created here! really nice job here, keep writing!
If u can, plz r and r some of my work, it will mean a lot to me!
Thanks!

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