for Facta Non Verba10/30/2005 c10 
6MrFlames
I hear there's going to be a new reality TV show about this. Except, instead of a reality TV show, it's going to be two monkeys beating each other with toasters. And instead of two monkeys beating each other with toasters, it's going to be the news.
Fox - Where the News Comes First.
6MrFlamesI hear there's going to be a new reality TV show about this. Except, instead of a reality TV show, it's going to be two monkeys beating each other with toasters. And instead of two monkeys beating each other with toasters, it's going to be the news.
Fox - Where the News Comes First.
10/28/2005 c10 27Typewriter King
Admit it, the Miami Herald spawned you in a test tube. At least, they should have. -cellent work there.
27Typewriter KingAdmit it, the Miami Herald spawned you in a test tube. At least, they should have. -cellent work there.
8/20/2005 c9 Mbwun
Dude... Florida sucks.
You take it in stride, though. That's good. It helps fight the alcoholism. I've found, anyway.
Dude... Florida sucks.
You take it in stride, though. That's good. It helps fight the alcoholism. I've found, anyway.
8/19/2005 c9 JaveHarron
Funny chapter here!
Funny chapter here!
8/15/2005 c9 roseleeks
Brilliant. Dave Barry-esque. :) These essays are hilarious and well-paced. As for hurricanes, we're kind of wussy in Tidewater VA. Our big stories are mostly about Isabel, which was only a Cat. 1 when it passed through. We got out of school for two weeks. But my family got power back first because my dad's a park manager and let the people stay in the mansion on the park. Anyway, you're a great writer, and I feel sorry for those who have to deal with real hurricanes.
Brilliant. Dave Barry-esque. :) These essays are hilarious and well-paced. As for hurricanes, we're kind of wussy in Tidewater VA. Our big stories are mostly about Isabel, which was only a Cat. 1 when it passed through. We got out of school for two weeks. But my family got power back first because my dad's a park manager and let the people stay in the mansion on the park. Anyway, you're a great writer, and I feel sorry for those who have to deal with real hurricanes.
8/11/2004 c8 15Radyn
This is exactly why we have to keep Bush...the Clear Skies Act is our last chance of twarting Nature and her evil agents of destruction.
15RadynThis is exactly why we have to keep Bush...the Clear Skies Act is our last chance of twarting Nature and her evil agents of destruction.
8/11/2004 c8 CW-nerd-12
For me, the hurricanes just means I might get friday after school and I have to look up what the hurricane did to Martinique for French class. HA. Anyway, I find it an interesting coinciddence that you wrote a chapter entitled squirrely wrath when the other day a frind of mine was wearing a tshirt starring Foamy the Squirrel (tm) with the caption "ear my squirrely wrath." Odd. I used to have a pet flying squirrel named Rocky, and he was the bomb until he died. Normal squirrels may suck, but flying squirrels are just totally cool.
For me, the hurricanes just means I might get friday after school and I have to look up what the hurricane did to Martinique for French class. HA. Anyway, I find it an interesting coinciddence that you wrote a chapter entitled squirrely wrath when the other day a frind of mine was wearing a tshirt starring Foamy the Squirrel (tm) with the caption "ear my squirrely wrath." Odd. I used to have a pet flying squirrel named Rocky, and he was the bomb until he died. Normal squirrels may suck, but flying squirrels are just totally cool.
8/11/2004 c8 6MrFlames
What they never tell you, is that by "nature" they mean "plants." They don't actually mean "nature," because when one thinks of things logically, one will realize that all things are "natural" because nothing can be "unnatural" because natural in the closest sense of the word means pretty much everything. The only things unnatural are god, Santa Clause, and leonard nemoy. And i'm not so sure about Santa Clause.
6MrFlamesWhat they never tell you, is that by "nature" they mean "plants." They don't actually mean "nature," because when one thinks of things logically, one will realize that all things are "natural" because nothing can be "unnatural" because natural in the closest sense of the word means pretty much everything. The only things unnatural are god, Santa Clause, and leonard nemoy. And i'm not so sure about Santa Clause.
8/10/2004 c8 Mbwun
Eminem does bear a startling resemblance to an albino ferret...
Speaking of spiders, I just saw a picture of one (two, rather) of the desert-dwelling eight-legged mofos our troops in Iraq are having to deal with. Holy hell, those things are big! I understand now why they shoot them!
Ducks don't wear baseball caps, but they do shit on them.
I too was a Boy Scout (Eagle Scout, actually), and I too remember many an "experience" in the outdoors. Of course, where I live, it was raining during most of them. That was a given, though, so we didn't worry too much about it.
Bummer about the lightning, though. I wouldn't go swimming in the ocean anytime soon.
I remember this one time a squirrel got into the lining of my rain jacket... freaked the hell out of me when I put it on.
I look forward to hurricane rants; this is still the funniest thing on this site.
~He Who Walks On All Fours
Eminem does bear a startling resemblance to an albino ferret...
Speaking of spiders, I just saw a picture of one (two, rather) of the desert-dwelling eight-legged mofos our troops in Iraq are having to deal with. Holy hell, those things are big! I understand now why they shoot them!
Ducks don't wear baseball caps, but they do shit on them.
I too was a Boy Scout (Eagle Scout, actually), and I too remember many an "experience" in the outdoors. Of course, where I live, it was raining during most of them. That was a given, though, so we didn't worry too much about it.
Bummer about the lightning, though. I wouldn't go swimming in the ocean anytime soon.
I remember this one time a squirrel got into the lining of my rain jacket... freaked the hell out of me when I put it on.
I look forward to hurricane rants; this is still the funniest thing on this site.
~He Who Walks On All Fours