for Extended Lufians4/2/2004 c4 
53Artemis Astralstar
hmm, i'm not so fond of songs on this site, but this is very well written. i like it. it fits the music i'm listening to, (Alice in Chains) well thought out though, sorry i can;t think up anything better to say in this review, but i don't know enough about songs to do so.
53Artemis Astralstarhmm, i'm not so fond of songs on this site, but this is very well written. i like it. it fits the music i'm listening to, (Alice in Chains) well thought out though, sorry i can;t think up anything better to say in this review, but i don't know enough about songs to do so.
4/2/2004 c3 Artemis Astralstar
this is very pretty, i like the sentiments in it, and the realisation at the end, from the question at the beginning, i caught that.
my favourite lines... "casual deadly harvest" "fantasy romance my reality" the imagery in this was rife, and gave my imaginiation some beautiful views. great work for a first sonnet. if you want another form to play with, try iambic pentameter!
this is very pretty, i like the sentiments in it, and the realisation at the end, from the question at the beginning, i caught that.
my favourite lines... "casual deadly harvest" "fantasy romance my reality" the imagery in this was rife, and gave my imaginiation some beautiful views. great work for a first sonnet. if you want another form to play with, try iambic pentameter!
4/1/2004 c4 Cursive and Print
Great job, once again. These are super! I can't leave a longer review because i'm in a rush. loved it!
Great job, once again. These are super! I can't leave a longer review because i'm in a rush. loved it!
3/29/2004 c2 64not sure yet
yea i know what you mean..haiku are hard, anywayz, you did an awesome job for it though, very sadish and interesting, there's a lot stuffed into those few words, muchly enjoyed, excellent job
64not sure yetyea i know what you mean..haiku are hard, anywayz, you did an awesome job for it though, very sadish and interesting, there's a lot stuffed into those few words, muchly enjoyed, excellent job
3/29/2004 c1 not sure yet
fascinating, love the idea and the language in this one, flows very well and beautiful images with odd sayings that sort of give an image to things that you normally cant see, i dunno, i like it a lot though, awesome job
fascinating, love the idea and the language in this one, flows very well and beautiful images with odd sayings that sort of give an image to things that you normally cant see, i dunno, i like it a lot though, awesome job
3/29/2004 c4 8glitterjewele
*sniffle* o to the infinite bittersweetness! *sigh* a very, very good chapter, this one ~ quite a cool surprise to find a song, i must say. it had a great rhythm running through it, certainly very songish, very songish indeed. ;) seriously though, fabulous quote to use for inspiration ~ i read it twice and it made me sigh both times. and your piece is such a great reflection of it, really it is. absolutely loved this stanza:
This cliff, they say it’s the highest
It looks over the world they say
And its love in the aftermath of pain
It’s a bittersweet package:
It always comes too late
And if you’re lucky, leaves to early
the first couple lines especially have that wistful, sigh-inducing air to them ~ definitely feels like emptiness, or a regretful memory . . . truly excellent chapter, chica, i await the next one with bated breath *nods emphatically* :) kudos!
8glitterjewele*sniffle* o to the infinite bittersweetness! *sigh* a very, very good chapter, this one ~ quite a cool surprise to find a song, i must say. it had a great rhythm running through it, certainly very songish, very songish indeed. ;) seriously though, fabulous quote to use for inspiration ~ i read it twice and it made me sigh both times. and your piece is such a great reflection of it, really it is. absolutely loved this stanza:
This cliff, they say it’s the highest
It looks over the world they say
And its love in the aftermath of pain
It’s a bittersweet package:
It always comes too late
And if you’re lucky, leaves to early
the first couple lines especially have that wistful, sigh-inducing air to them ~ definitely feels like emptiness, or a regretful memory . . . truly excellent chapter, chica, i await the next one with bated breath *nods emphatically* :) kudos!
3/28/2004 c4 Modern Poet
That was very though-provoking and truthful. At the same time very original and romantic. Great work!
That was very though-provoking and truthful. At the same time very original and romantic. Great work!
3/28/2004 c4 acccountkiller
Hey! *sob* this is so sad...chica...why do you write such simply amazing other-worldly fabulous stuff that makes me sad cos its so..so PERFECT! And it's sad cos...*sigh*...well obviously it's sad not to have your true love right in front of you. But you didn't have to point it out this beautifully and with such blasting brilliant imagery! It rocks! Honestly, you are the best author here, I assure you *looks around for ppl who dare not say the same* *smirk*. See? No one says the contrary. Therefore you are the best author here. Forgive me for 'stroking your ego', I am just saying the truth! You rock! Honestly! Lots of love! Mia
PS: My friend downloaded 'full' and it's not off Stanley Climbfalls or No Name Face...not album..it's just a demo thingy...you should be able to download it though.
Hey! *sob* this is so sad...chica...why do you write such simply amazing other-worldly fabulous stuff that makes me sad cos its so..so PERFECT! And it's sad cos...*sigh*...well obviously it's sad not to have your true love right in front of you. But you didn't have to point it out this beautifully and with such blasting brilliant imagery! It rocks! Honestly, you are the best author here, I assure you *looks around for ppl who dare not say the same* *smirk*. See? No one says the contrary. Therefore you are the best author here. Forgive me for 'stroking your ego', I am just saying the truth! You rock! Honestly! Lots of love! Mia
PS: My friend downloaded 'full' and it's not off Stanley Climbfalls or No Name Face...not album..it's just a demo thingy...you should be able to download it though.
3/18/2004 c3 acccountkiller
Hey! Chica, first of all, sorry for the late review, my life has been...phew...HECTIC! And second, I hope you are OK as we haven't spoken in quite a while. Third of all, lol, the poem! This ROCKS! I love it...I can't find the words to describe this litterary masterpiece. It's as close to perfection as a poem can get. It's drop dead gorgeous, so deep, so powerful...simply enchanting! I love it! It's fantabulous! I have to run but mwah! This rocks! Lots of lufians! Mia
Hey! Chica, first of all, sorry for the late review, my life has been...phew...HECTIC! And second, I hope you are OK as we haven't spoken in quite a while. Third of all, lol, the poem! This ROCKS! I love it...I can't find the words to describe this litterary masterpiece. It's as close to perfection as a poem can get. It's drop dead gorgeous, so deep, so powerful...simply enchanting! I love it! It's fantabulous! I have to run but mwah! This rocks! Lots of lufians! Mia
3/16/2004 c3 Cursive and Print
Oh my gosh, awesome, awesome job! These poems are awesome... this is your first sonnet? Excellent job and keep up the super work!
Oh my gosh, awesome, awesome job! These poems are awesome... this is your first sonnet? Excellent job and keep up the super work!
3/9/2004 c3 glitterjewele
*tumultuous applause* YAY! congratualtions on the successful stunning completion of your first sonnet ever! *throws confetti* :D really, you'd never know this was the first one, it's really very good. everything weaves together so well, and is so tangible ~ it's like working your way through this maze of emotion, to read it. my favorite part/concept was when you describe heaven and earth being intertwined ~ it made for a great beginning, and t'was sheer brilliance to bring it back at the end, as well! also, this line: "though heaven i'd have sacrificed for your heart's soft surveillance" ~ simply phenomenal. love the statement for what it is, first of all, and also the sound of "heart's soft surveillance" really sounded soft (good use of "S" consonance ;). fantastic new addition to the series, chica, can't wait to see what you write next! :D kudos!
*tumultuous applause* YAY! congratualtions on the successful stunning completion of your first sonnet ever! *throws confetti* :D really, you'd never know this was the first one, it's really very good. everything weaves together so well, and is so tangible ~ it's like working your way through this maze of emotion, to read it. my favorite part/concept was when you describe heaven and earth being intertwined ~ it made for a great beginning, and t'was sheer brilliance to bring it back at the end, as well! also, this line: "though heaven i'd have sacrificed for your heart's soft surveillance" ~ simply phenomenal. love the statement for what it is, first of all, and also the sound of "heart's soft surveillance" really sounded soft (good use of "S" consonance ;). fantastic new addition to the series, chica, can't wait to see what you write next! :D kudos!
3/9/2004 c3 Modern Poet
Wow, pretty and sweet!
Wow, pretty and sweet!
3/6/2004 c1 JackKarson
I really like your idea. I also think that this first chapter is realy good compared to the other crap on fictionpress.
I really like your idea. I also think that this first chapter is realy good compared to the other crap on fictionpress.
3/3/2004 c2 artemis astralstar
... ok, i see two ways of interpretting this, and the first involves a missing apostrophe on protection's.
~
the other, is: ... ok, i lied.
~
I love the imagery of it though; the 'ripple' suggesting the sould to be water, and disturbed.
*
sacred camouflage...i suppose it is; people try to believe a lie..
-
I Love this haiku, it was so well thought out! well done! *claps*
/
Corny is ok; Once in a while...
+
i like the definition, well done! write more soon!
... ok, i see two ways of interpretting this, and the first involves a missing apostrophe on protection's.
~
the other, is: ... ok, i lied.
~
I love the imagery of it though; the 'ripple' suggesting the sould to be water, and disturbed.
*
sacred camouflage...i suppose it is; people try to believe a lie..
-
I Love this haiku, it was so well thought out! well done! *claps*
/
Corny is ok; Once in a while...
+
i like the definition, well done! write more soon!
3/3/2004 c2 acccountkiller
Hey chica! Morbid..lol, but I like it a lot! Very...you. Lol, rocks...mysterious and unclear but fantabulous all the same *sigh* when will you write more? love, Mia
Hey chica! Morbid..lol, but I like it a lot! Very...you. Lol, rocks...mysterious and unclear but fantabulous all the same *sigh* when will you write more? love, Mia