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7/19/2004 c1 Ishtar Johnston
I enjoyed this piece, puts in perspective alot that has happened to me also in the past two years. You write so well and I look forward to reading more from you. *purt you on her authors list*
I hope you've found the colours of happiness...
5/19/2004 c1 1Slightly Bent Halo
i just stumbled across this, and realised i had read it before. i never reviewed before, and now that i have my own stuff up, i realise how much u just want people to review, even if all they do is acknowledge they're reading it.
i'm not re-reading it (sorry i'm lazy) but from what i remember it was good. almost too painful to read, but honest.
the only thing i could suggest, is that maybe it be a lillte more spread out, over a few hcapters. this is for two reasons. #1 is that i personally find shorter chapters easier to read, and #2 is that i think it would be better and easier to understand where u were coming from with more detail thrown in. but then again, i'm nto a writer, so what do i know!
luv Renai x
5/16/2004 c2 150SpawnMeister666
I should point out that in my initial review when I said I'd 'think of something good to say in a minute', I was actually meaning some words of encouragement to try to get you to cheer up a little, more than having to try to think of something good to say about what you'd written.
The subject matter is such that it's difficult to see anything positive from it, although I believe that if you were to look back on it and just say
"It happened, it's in the past, I've dealt with it, and I've moved on"
you wouldn't have to spend so long swimming sideways and could get on with the rest of your life in peace and happiness.
Or something like that!
Spawny
4/30/2004 c1 32Birdaloo
this story doesnt really fit your style! its not like anything youve ever written before. i miss your writing! please put some new things out soon! your AMAZING! i like this story, but the metaphore on the end seems out of place. its SUCH a great paragraph, it kind of pulls the story out of its day-by-day list of events and into a more poetic moment. nicely done though. PLEASE MORE!
~Birdy
2/29/2004 c1 150SpawnMeister666
I'll think of something good to say in a minute.
Probably.
Well, on the plus side, this was extremely well written, and I particularly like the ending.
You really should get out there and start living your life hon. Clearly it's the way forwards.
Make your kids proud of you and your ex realise what a total jerk he is.
Spawny
2/16/2004 c1 Miss Wendy
I truly enjoy your essays/stories and the insight into your life they provide, but this one really made me uncomfortable. I'd suggest putting in some of the reasonings behind your thoughts, because it really does come across quite...selfish.
Honestly, why stay with a guy that's going to drink and drive? Why put up with that? It's not so much putting himself at risk, because I personally don't give a flying shit about drunk drivers that kill themselves but I do wonder why you would allow your children to grow up with such an irresponsible, self-centred bastard.
Isn't there a point where you just say 'hey, I don't care if I'm alone, it's better to be alone than to be a jackass'? What if one day he gets in the car, drives around with your kids and kills/maims them?
And honestly, when 17 year olds come up with 'I don't give a shit about the consequences' statements that's generally a pretty damn big cry for help, not disregard for your love/concern.
It puzzles me that you were so against the two elder boys living with the neighbour - you weren't really providing them with that great of a life so why not let them strike out on their own? I don't doubt they love you to bits (children will forgive a lot worse). Oh, the ramblings I go on with! Perhaps I'm biased. Yeah, I think I'm biased - I grew up with a mother who'd drive drunk with us in the car and her *charming* boyfriend. For me, moving out (being kicked out) at 15 and living with my natural father was the best thing that could have happenned. It was a chance to live in a 'more normal' household. I guess because of this I sympathise more with the children. Also, because I have a child of my own, I find it incredibly hard to understand how a parent could allow their child/ren to be in such dangerous situations - I wailed my bloody eyes out when my little boy was 2 or 3 months old because I simply Do Not Understand.
I feel damn nasty leaving this review, but I'm going to submit it anyway. I don't doubt you have your reasons for living/having lived the way you do/did, but you're going to garner more understanding if you give the reasons as to why you made such choices.

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