for The Unicorn3/15/2012 c2 
62Erlkoenigin
Das ist ja doch kein 2. Teil, sondern ein ganz wunderbares Gedicht, das das Motiv der Geschichte aufgreift
Es ist auch formal gut gelungen mit den einzelnen Wörtern zwischen den längeren Zeilen
LG
Franziska
62ErlkoeniginDas ist ja doch kein 2. Teil, sondern ein ganz wunderbares Gedicht, das das Motiv der Geschichte aufgreift
Es ist auch formal gut gelungen mit den einzelnen Wörtern zwischen den längeren Zeilen
LG
Franziska
3/15/2012 c2 Maxine Durchova
This is one of the most beautiful things I have ever read. Thank you for writing it, I needed something like this.
Max
This is one of the most beautiful things I have ever read. Thank you for writing it, I needed something like this.
Max
3/15/2012 c2 Kelpylion
That's absof*inglutely gorgeous. This, from the piles of cliche` and uninspired religious poetry one usually sees? Wow. Beautiful.
That's absof*inglutely gorgeous. This, from the piles of cliche` and uninspired religious poetry one usually sees? Wow. Beautiful.
3/15/2012 c2 Anastasia Who
This is beautiful. I love how you relate the unicorn to God and although the woman wasn't perfect, the unicorn laid his head on her, as if she was. For, that is how we become in God's eyes when we have been saved. He sees us as perfect, He restores that purity. Beautiful poem.
This is beautiful. I love how you relate the unicorn to God and although the woman wasn't perfect, the unicorn laid his head on her, as if she was. For, that is how we become in God's eyes when we have been saved. He sees us as perfect, He restores that purity. Beautiful poem.
3/15/2012 c2 Ivriniel
This one´s so beautifully written, I always have to ccry when I read it.
This one´s so beautifully written, I always have to ccry when I read it.
3/15/2012 c2 Simple Enigma
lovely! hats off, i really enjoyed the imagry, i havnt read your story about it yet, (though i think i will) but knowing the mythology as i do i can tell you that you did a lovely job!
lovely! hats off, i really enjoyed the imagry, i havnt read your story about it yet, (though i think i will) but knowing the mythology as i do i can tell you that you did a lovely job!
3/15/2012 c2 E. A. Tetje
A long time ago you asked me to read your story "Unicorn", and as I was just read some of Steelsings pieces I noticed that you said something about your poem "Unicorn" so I decided to check it out. I like it, it is well written and it flows well. Godd job.
~Bethy~
A long time ago you asked me to read your story "Unicorn", and as I was just read some of Steelsings pieces I noticed that you said something about your poem "Unicorn" so I decided to check it out. I like it, it is well written and it flows well. Godd job.
~Bethy~
3/15/2012 c2 Broken-Serenity
sorry it took so long to reply, thanxs for reviewing my poems. i love the way you have created this masterpiece. it is wonderful. *Hug* keep up the GREAT work
sorry it took so long to reply, thanxs for reviewing my poems. i love the way you have created this masterpiece. it is wonderful. *Hug* keep up the GREAT work
3/15/2012 c2 Theopolia
This is powerful, and beautifully written.
This is powerful, and beautifully written.
3/15/2012 c2 Rose Dark Thorn
This is so beautiful...
^^; I actually feel bad, becuase that's about the only thing I can really think of to say.
Actually, I think a lot of people could probably undertsand the meaning without have to read the story. I understood it, and half way through, I thought, this reminds me of the story. ^^
It was beautiful, and I truly loved it. You writing is a work of art.
This is so beautiful...
^^; I actually feel bad, becuase that's about the only thing I can really think of to say.
Actually, I think a lot of people could probably undertsand the meaning without have to read the story. I understood it, and half way through, I thought, this reminds me of the story. ^^
It was beautiful, and I truly loved it. You writing is a work of art.
3/15/2012 c2 Program36
I liked how this poem created a certain atmosphere that couldn't quite be defined. The story 'the unicorn' sounds quite interesting i'll have to check it out sometime. Great work.
I liked how this poem created a certain atmosphere that couldn't quite be defined. The story 'the unicorn' sounds quite interesting i'll have to check it out sometime. Great work.
3/15/2012 c2 Getuie
I think the switch in perspectives from the story Unicorn to this really helps to give the overall story that much body... You know how I like to view different perspectives of a single occurance and this really gave me that satisfaction.
The structure is also so well used. It makes one pause at each line and really take in what's being said. It's really effective.
I think the switch in perspectives from the story Unicorn to this really helps to give the overall story that much body... You know how I like to view different perspectives of a single occurance and this really gave me that satisfaction.
The structure is also so well used. It makes one pause at each line and really take in what's being said. It's really effective.
3/15/2012 c2 Ashes of a Willow
I love unicorns, and this was a beautiful piece! I might just have to read your story now, because I'm that's wonderful too!
I love unicorns, and this was a beautiful piece! I might just have to read your story now, because I'm that's wonderful too!
3/15/2012 c2 12Aurora Borealis - Polar Lights
I love this story! It’s beautiful. Just beautiful. The first paragraph alone… Describing the girl, describing her very pleasantly, yet somehow already setting the mood.
Also, the story is breathing, it is alive, you almost feel as if you were there yourself, watching on from the distance, maybe as one of the wood’s animals sitting in one of the trees, watching, wondering what is going on…
I like the line “Nothing left to her to wash away the pain – no tears but crimson ones”. It’s so descriptive, so palpable. Crimson tears… I can so empathise with that.
I loved the x-ray bit. It somehow breaks the atmosphere of nature untainted by human beings that you use in the rest of the story, it stands out against the story. It makes it undisputable that the unicorn will see through the girl, see all of her, even those parts of her that she’s trying to hide from herself or can’t see herself. It makes it sound so merciless.
“A heart that mattered. A heart that was worthy of a wonder. A heart that was made the centre of affection. The centre of a love that would not look away. A love that would not flinch. That meant her. Only her.” and “silver and golden hair mingling“ and „Spring had come.” – so beautiful! Just beautiful!
And the poem is divine in its beauty! Such a powerful language, such powerful imagery, such powerful meaning. Beautiful.
12Aurora Borealis - Polar LightsI love this story! It’s beautiful. Just beautiful. The first paragraph alone… Describing the girl, describing her very pleasantly, yet somehow already setting the mood.
Also, the story is breathing, it is alive, you almost feel as if you were there yourself, watching on from the distance, maybe as one of the wood’s animals sitting in one of the trees, watching, wondering what is going on…
I like the line “Nothing left to her to wash away the pain – no tears but crimson ones”. It’s so descriptive, so palpable. Crimson tears… I can so empathise with that.
I loved the x-ray bit. It somehow breaks the atmosphere of nature untainted by human beings that you use in the rest of the story, it stands out against the story. It makes it undisputable that the unicorn will see through the girl, see all of her, even those parts of her that she’s trying to hide from herself or can’t see herself. It makes it sound so merciless.
“A heart that mattered. A heart that was worthy of a wonder. A heart that was made the centre of affection. The centre of a love that would not look away. A love that would not flinch. That meant her. Only her.” and “silver and golden hair mingling“ and „Spring had come.” – so beautiful! Just beautiful!
And the poem is divine in its beauty! Such a powerful language, such powerful imagery, such powerful meaning. Beautiful.
12/17/2009 c1 6letyoursoultakeflight
Wow, your description is so beautiful! I have just read the first paragraph so far and I am utterly entranced!
An elusive, intuitive belief in wonders.
- again, I adore the way you use words!
Nothing left to her to wash away the pain – no tears but crimson ones.
- reminds me of mirabella's poems on here :)
Yet what finally came was no poisonous spider to bite her neck. No wild cat came to scratch at her skin, nor human predator to strangle her.
- i like how yoiu describe something by saying what it's not :)
Absolutely lovely :)
6letyoursoultakeflightWow, your description is so beautiful! I have just read the first paragraph so far and I am utterly entranced!
An elusive, intuitive belief in wonders.
- again, I adore the way you use words!
Nothing left to her to wash away the pain – no tears but crimson ones.
- reminds me of mirabella's poems on here :)
Yet what finally came was no poisonous spider to bite her neck. No wild cat came to scratch at her skin, nor human predator to strangle her.
- i like how yoiu describe something by saying what it's not :)
Absolutely lovely :)