10/6/2005 c1 4Aldarona Finarfin
Oro! I like it. It has a good idea behind it, you know what I'm saying? ^^ Anywho, I'm not sure what this poem needs, if anything. One minute, I think it would be stronger if said something other than, "One day, I'll do great things", but then the next minute I like it. It does need to be reread, just to fix some grammatical problems, and the flow could probably be worked on a bit too. There's a lot of words being used, and it kind of makes the poem...foggy? Yeah, that's the word I'm looking for. Oh, and you don't need as many commas as you used. It's a little distracting. But...other than my complaining, I really liked it! It makes me want to write a poem about something similar, but I'll restrain myself ^^.Oh yeah...thank you for the review! I blushed a little when you said it sounded Shakespearian ^^

6/25/2004 c1 6Froggie0
Loved it! And I totally agree- it's so dumb not to be yourself and to hide your feelings all the time. I never hide my feelings- dramatize them, yes, but never hide them. Great poem!
~Froggie0~
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