for The Allure of Virginity12/15/2004 c8 
1Xujin
At first, i thought this story would be kinda weird, but now I'm really intrigued. Damn those guys are f*ing bastards... I'd like to shoot them...nah, that'd only make me as bad as them. ANYWAY, please update. I REALLY wanna know what happens.
1XujinAt first, i thought this story would be kinda weird, but now I'm really intrigued. Damn those guys are f*ing bastards... I'd like to shoot them...nah, that'd only make me as bad as them. ANYWAY, please update. I REALLY wanna know what happens.
12/15/2004 c8 3Dire deWolf
Some of this is expected, but otherwise it's very unexpected. I don't know if it's truly like this in Australia, but where I live it's the opposite. Everyone is against, in the highest, rich white males, even if they don't have a thing against other people. I really think that it's people who think others are being racists against them that are truly being the racists themselves. It's like they never look in a mirror or study their actions. There was an African-American like that at NJROTC and she got furious at others (also dark-skinned) for being my friend or any other 'white crackers'. A friend of mine, Keisha, as well as many others ignored her insults. So while Keisha's studying and working her way up (she's higher than me in rank), the first just complained and whined. Keisha and I were very happy to see her leave with nothing more than a last heckling. Keisha is now a squad leader.A man can't really admit that he doesn't want a child either. Doesn't everyone want someone to love or to be loved by? Dominant or submissive? That's a person's choice in the matter, or to what's being discussed.I don't think I've ever hated a character as much as Mark, but I guess that was the desired response since he is the antagonist.
3Dire deWolfSome of this is expected, but otherwise it's very unexpected. I don't know if it's truly like this in Australia, but where I live it's the opposite. Everyone is against, in the highest, rich white males, even if they don't have a thing against other people. I really think that it's people who think others are being racists against them that are truly being the racists themselves. It's like they never look in a mirror or study their actions. There was an African-American like that at NJROTC and she got furious at others (also dark-skinned) for being my friend or any other 'white crackers'. A friend of mine, Keisha, as well as many others ignored her insults. So while Keisha's studying and working her way up (she's higher than me in rank), the first just complained and whined. Keisha and I were very happy to see her leave with nothing more than a last heckling. Keisha is now a squad leader.A man can't really admit that he doesn't want a child either. Doesn't everyone want someone to love or to be loved by? Dominant or submissive? That's a person's choice in the matter, or to what's being discussed.I don't think I've ever hated a character as much as Mark, but I guess that was the desired response since he is the antagonist.
12/15/2004 c8 21Knightmare Elite
Well I was waiting patiently for an update; but for the first time I really felt a shock in the story. It wasn't even the previous 'controvertial' contrent that bothered me. Rather it was the racial slurs especially the 'N' word.
I understand it was used to further carry the story. Still I felt somewhat offended by it. This isn't a flame or anything even though I saw the story hint in something like this. I didn't know it was going to be this extreme.
Still it was an interesting update though with minor spelling errors. I'll be waiting for the next update.
21Knightmare EliteWell I was waiting patiently for an update; but for the first time I really felt a shock in the story. It wasn't even the previous 'controvertial' contrent that bothered me. Rather it was the racial slurs especially the 'N' word.
I understand it was used to further carry the story. Still I felt somewhat offended by it. This isn't a flame or anything even though I saw the story hint in something like this. I didn't know it was going to be this extreme.
Still it was an interesting update though with minor spelling errors. I'll be waiting for the next update.
12/14/2004 c7 3Dire deWolf
I love your description, how you describe Keith's thoughts, and the linked events. Would the smoke have something to do with a colt of some kind? You kept mentioning it and I kept wondering why. Except for minor and few grammar and spelling errors, everything was perfect...DO GUYS REALLY THINK LIKE THAT? DEAR LORD!
3Dire deWolfI love your description, how you describe Keith's thoughts, and the linked events. Would the smoke have something to do with a colt of some kind? You kept mentioning it and I kept wondering why. Except for minor and few grammar and spelling errors, everything was perfect...DO GUYS REALLY THINK LIKE THAT? DEAR LORD!
12/13/2004 c7 Spiritual Cramp
Well I just finished reading and this is slightly disturbing...but you're an awesome writer.
Well I just finished reading and this is slightly disturbing...but you're an awesome writer.
12/12/2004 c7 4Image of the Invisible
it's simply perfect. she's in the pond, isn't she? haha. love the story. update soon! (=
4Image of the Invisibleit's simply perfect. she's in the pond, isn't she? haha. love the story. update soon! (=
12/12/2004 c7 Guest
SHES IN THE POND SHES IN THE POND! And that comment about america, i find that offensive. But what can i do about it. please update soon..
?
SHES IN THE POND SHES IN THE POND! And that comment about america, i find that offensive. But what can i do about it. please update soon..
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12/11/2004 c7 2Heavy B Inc
Impressive story my dear friend
I see that you have managed to do what most writers struggle to do
Simply excellent work... I can't wait for new updates... And of course you are officially in my favourites list :)
2Heavy B IncImpressive story my dear friend
I see that you have managed to do what most writers struggle to do
Simply excellent work... I can't wait for new updates... And of course you are officially in my favourites list :)
12/10/2004 c7 21Knightmare Elite
Another good update and a new character comes into the picture. He seems a little mysterious but at the same time he's made himself very cozy in the family. I do have one thing to say though, the comment about psychos and such having an abundance in america...they're everywhere...
Other than that hope to see more. The story is getting intersting though it does seem to be slowling down a little.
21Knightmare EliteAnother good update and a new character comes into the picture. He seems a little mysterious but at the same time he's made himself very cozy in the family. I do have one thing to say though, the comment about psychos and such having an abundance in america...they're everywhere...
Other than that hope to see more. The story is getting intersting though it does seem to be slowling down a little.
11/30/2004 c6 5Mountain Ash
This story is amazing. I love the fact you put your protagonist in the place of the sort of person who is usually portrayed as a monster. And while we can all agree what he is doing is horrific it treats him as a human with reasons for doing such things which is rare and interesting. So um yes congrats.
5Mountain AshThis story is amazing. I love the fact you put your protagonist in the place of the sort of person who is usually portrayed as a monster. And while we can all agree what he is doing is horrific it treats him as a human with reasons for doing such things which is rare and interesting. So um yes congrats.
11/27/2004 c6 1Anime Girl006
Hello. I like your story alot. I have never rad a story like your before. Each time I wanted to stop reading. But I kept on because I wanted to see what happen at the end of each chapter (well only chapter 5). But your story is so good. I hope you keep writing. Please don't stop. well until you update again bye.P.S.: Your story is the first story I have read on Fiction Press. Congrats.
1Anime Girl006Hello. I like your story alot. I have never rad a story like your before. Each time I wanted to stop reading. But I kept on because I wanted to see what happen at the end of each chapter (well only chapter 5). But your story is so good. I hope you keep writing. Please don't stop. well until you update again bye.P.S.: Your story is the first story I have read on Fiction Press. Congrats.
11/27/2004 c6 21Knightmare Elite
And now the plot thicks. Very good chapter it takes a break from the main story to explore some of the lesser known characters. I've been waiting a while for an update and it was woth the wait. This has definately got me waiting for the next chapter.
21Knightmare EliteAnd now the plot thicks. Very good chapter it takes a break from the main story to explore some of the lesser known characters. I've been waiting a while for an update and it was woth the wait. This has definately got me waiting for the next chapter.
11/27/2004 c6 5RedRumMurder
Couldn't resist. Read the whole thing in one go. Got a little worried in a couple of chapters because they seemed... not right. Lol. I couldn't put it in any other way. But really, this story is extremely captivating. Strange as well. But I mentioned that already. Update soon. Are Mark and his friends in a cult?
5RedRumMurderCouldn't resist. Read the whole thing in one go. Got a little worried in a couple of chapters because they seemed... not right. Lol. I couldn't put it in any other way. But really, this story is extremely captivating. Strange as well. But I mentioned that already. Update soon. Are Mark and his friends in a cult?
11/27/2004 c2 RedRumMurder
I think you are strange. But thats ok. I like your attempt at being the black sheep here on FP. Will finish reading this later. I don't think I'll be able to read all this in one go. It's all too much for me. All the same, I like your writing style. Cept for the whole calculating the room size thing. That was just overdoing it... lol.
I think you are strange. But thats ok. I like your attempt at being the black sheep here on FP. Will finish reading this later. I don't think I'll be able to read all this in one go. It's all too much for me. All the same, I like your writing style. Cept for the whole calculating the room size thing. That was just overdoing it... lol.