for Perfect8/18/2005 c1 
21janet84
Hello:
I enjoyed the way this poem developed from a insecure young voice to an more mature, settled voice, even perhaps a bit spiritual. I would maybe think about changing the "why can't they just let me be me and get right off my case?" to something shorter - to be honest I almost stopped reading there because it sounded too conversational... and then I would have missed the nicei buildup to a epiphany about the value of self-esteem and friendship.
Thanks for reviewing my works!
21janet84Hello:
I enjoyed the way this poem developed from a insecure young voice to an more mature, settled voice, even perhaps a bit spiritual. I would maybe think about changing the "why can't they just let me be me and get right off my case?" to something shorter - to be honest I almost stopped reading there because it sounded too conversational... and then I would have missed the nicei buildup to a epiphany about the value of self-esteem and friendship.
Thanks for reviewing my works!
7/31/2004 c1 31Shadow Gryphon
Nice rhythem you got going in this one. I'm not all that good at poetry, but I do enjoy reading good poems. This is one of them.
And no, you don't need to disclaim if its your own work. Disclaiming is when you say that it isn't.
Au revoir,
Gryph
31Shadow GryphonNice rhythem you got going in this one. I'm not all that good at poetry, but I do enjoy reading good poems. This is one of them.
And no, you don't need to disclaim if its your own work. Disclaiming is when you say that it isn't.
Au revoir,
Gryph