Just In
for Pain

10/31/2005 c1 5TCGanimefan357
clap clap clap!
7/21/2005 c1 5RedHairedWriter
I think that is pretty true. and well written.
12/28/2004 c1 35Genine
Ooh, I like this. It's really really cool. And you're right. "Pain is promised to those/That let them take over"NICE!Genine**
11/11/2004 c1 25noodlegirl 28
this is a really great poem!
11/1/2004 c1 13sunscraped
It was all right. A little choppy with the rhythm, but it takes practice to get it right… One thing I’ve noticed: It’s probably not a good idea to have a period at the end of a stanza unless it is the end of the poem… And every line of the stanzas.
“With it's blackness” Um… blackness is used (at least by me) to describe a black person’s ebonics.
“In untamed happiness” I think untainted would be better word choice here…
Other than that, pretty good. I like the capitalization of Pain.
Oh, and thanks for the review.
10/6/2004 c1 26firehair-222
soem of the reviews you got are kinda scary.
this poem has many truths in it. well written. good job
9/16/2004 c1 44Amara the Warrior
9/11/2004 c1 31PaganScribe
8/28/2004 c1 egwshrgfdf
Hmm, simple but good! Nice work there! A tad depressing, but still a good one. (Hey, we need depression every once in a while, right?)
Keep writing!
8/27/2004 c1 Modern Poet
Very strong and insightful. Great work!
8/27/2004 c1 Brandy Bear
very nice I really like this and me being mature I’m going to ignore YOUR sad attempt to insult me. "Learn how to spell" ya thats a very mature good job
8/27/2004 c1 17Kinna
Interesting, and very good for writing it in such little time.
(I'm not the best at reviewing, but at least I try.)
Oh, and did you mean for for the word pain in the line "Why must Pain" be capitalized... Just wondering.
Again, interesting poem.
8/27/2004 c1 5Blackout the Swordsman
A little confusing, but not bad. Now for my rant- how do you recommend we fix this problem?
8/27/2004 c1 NeuroticGothicLolitaDeathDolly
Thank you for reviewing my poem "Succubus". I am always flattered when someone I don't know takes the time to review my work.
I like this piece. Pain is yummy, and I don't mean that in a mopey goth/emo way. I like pain. I like corruption. This poem was truly nice.
8/27/2004 c1 1always loving someone
pain stinks!
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