for The Airhead Files9/17/2004 c1 anon
your chapters are abit short but otherwise its pretty rad
your chapters are abit short but otherwise its pretty rad
9/15/2004 c1 u kno who i am. tho i hav calmed down a lot
umm. what happened to the 2nd chapter? and my review?
Ur evil mia...evil...
now ur being manipulative like the media...only showing what u want to be seen... im still in drama mode. long story.
anyway look im over the bimbo thing u can make me a bimbo whatever. i just don't like u insulting friends. cos like ash would follow someone like cynthia. and anyway its funnier if u dont put real names in cos then ppl can relate the characters to their own lives. besides ur comedy is better when ur lightly bagging claudie as oposed to majorly bitching me, kela, ash, stef or whoever. i think u should stick to that.
sincerely,
u kno who i am tho i hav calmed down a lot. AKA bec.
ps: i hope u knew it was me last time.
pps: would u stop avoiding and ignoring me. at least u apologised to stef. it getting annoying.
umm. what happened to the 2nd chapter? and my review?
Ur evil mia...evil...
now ur being manipulative like the media...only showing what u want to be seen... im still in drama mode. long story.
anyway look im over the bimbo thing u can make me a bimbo whatever. i just don't like u insulting friends. cos like ash would follow someone like cynthia. and anyway its funnier if u dont put real names in cos then ppl can relate the characters to their own lives. besides ur comedy is better when ur lightly bagging claudie as oposed to majorly bitching me, kela, ash, stef or whoever. i think u should stick to that.
sincerely,
u kno who i am tho i hav calmed down a lot. AKA bec.
ps: i hope u knew it was me last time.
pps: would u stop avoiding and ignoring me. at least u apologised to stef. it getting annoying.
9/10/2004 c2 claudie audie
Hello Mrs Bloom nee' Parker Robertson Blake and you know who
There are numerous things that I am compelled say about this chapter:
1. Great Chapter: much better than the first mainly because its funnier and longer
2. I love the characters especially Catherine- but could you be more obvious- at least change the name!
3. The plot needs to develop now, so as well as introducing your characters you should integrate more of the plot.
4. Though I love documentaries National Geo is not my favourite channel! (Ovation is KIDDING!) I love CSI and Law and Order as you should already know
5. i thought I was a humanities chick
6. poor kela. don't worry, if you're reading this,be assured our antagonsism isn't based on real life.
7. Um... I started this review before, but I forgot what I put in it.
8. Minnie has to have a role in the story
9.Oh! did you talk to bumblebee?
10. let me edit! impatient fool, I saw at least 10 mistakes!
Here is a summary:
Basically this is my favourite chapter. (you've only done two!)
I thought it was hilarious, but then again it may be because I get the subtext.
Let's get into the plot of the story.
If you have further enquries I will elaborate in more suitable circumstances,
Mini Mia
Hello Mrs Bloom nee' Parker Robertson Blake and you know who
There are numerous things that I am compelled say about this chapter:
1. Great Chapter: much better than the first mainly because its funnier and longer
2. I love the characters especially Catherine- but could you be more obvious- at least change the name!
3. The plot needs to develop now, so as well as introducing your characters you should integrate more of the plot.
4. Though I love documentaries National Geo is not my favourite channel! (Ovation is KIDDING!) I love CSI and Law and Order as you should already know
5. i thought I was a humanities chick
6. poor kela. don't worry, if you're reading this,be assured our antagonsism isn't based on real life.
7. Um... I started this review before, but I forgot what I put in it.
8. Minnie has to have a role in the story
9.Oh! did you talk to bumblebee?
10. let me edit! impatient fool, I saw at least 10 mistakes!
Here is a summary:
Basically this is my favourite chapter. (you've only done two!)
I thought it was hilarious, but then again it may be because I get the subtext.
Let's get into the plot of the story.
If you have further enquries I will elaborate in more suitable circumstances,
Mini Mia
9/8/2004 c1 miniqiduz
*Clap*Clap*...You've put it up! Finally...
Mrs Orlando Bloom: I was hoping this would be your very 1st review...But unfortunaly due too "Claudie" this will be your 2nd review! hey?..i've just relized...your like the 1st person, iv'e ever known to have actually written a story and put it on the net! Yay!
Something to be proud of "Mrs Orlando Bloom"! (hehehe)
Well ...Great chapter, your story has a very witty start, which is good(For an amateur!), but i have to agree, with claudie..on:
•Longer chapters
•Discription = Characters
•And all that technical stuff about writing that claudie is going to brief you on
oh...and i almost forgot...(hehehe) the bit about where Celco is "proud"
Anyway, You must update!...after all noone likes reading stories that only have 1 chapter !
Miniqiduz ( '';)
*Clap*Clap*...You've put it up! Finally...
Mrs Orlando Bloom: I was hoping this would be your very 1st review...But unfortunaly due too "Claudie" this will be your 2nd review! hey?..i've just relized...your like the 1st person, iv'e ever known to have actually written a story and put it on the net! Yay!
Something to be proud of "Mrs Orlando Bloom"! (hehehe)
Well ...Great chapter, your story has a very witty start, which is good(For an amateur!), but i have to agree, with claudie..on:
•Longer chapters
•Discription = Characters
•And all that technical stuff about writing that claudie is going to brief you on
oh...and i almost forgot...(hehehe) the bit about where Celco is "proud"
Anyway, You must update!...after all noone likes reading stories that only have 1 chapter !
Miniqiduz ( '';)
9/7/2004 c1 claudie audie
Hello evil foe. Actually I'm so excited because you've finally put it up! Yay! Congrats. (thunderous applause)
So here's your v. first r/w:
1. It's a really funny beginning, actually the more I read it the more I laugh (however you do need to get some objective reviwers , maybe I'm just laughing because I can't believe you wrote it (KIDDING!)
2. Maybe you should consider more description, especially considering characters, I enjoy a story more if I can really visualise the characters
3. Maybe a bit longer chapters, long chapters are usually a good thing, if readers are like me they are drawn to length.
4. Consider getting a beta -reader (did I mention that I've always wanted to be one?) actually I think it was party my fault- we were so excited uploading this thing that we forgot to edit it. There are some spelling/ grammar mistakes and some narrative boo boo's (see me at geo/music for elaboration)
5. Upload more chapters pls.!
6. Have you noticed that I've been extremely nice in this review?
7. Celco would be proud (hahahaha)
anyway it was a really great beginning
make sure you update but only on fridays
and don't obsess about this fic because I won't accept any liability if you fail your HSC!
Claudie :)
Hello evil foe. Actually I'm so excited because you've finally put it up! Yay! Congrats. (thunderous applause)
So here's your v. first r/w:
1. It's a really funny beginning, actually the more I read it the more I laugh (however you do need to get some objective reviwers , maybe I'm just laughing because I can't believe you wrote it (KIDDING!)
2. Maybe you should consider more description, especially considering characters, I enjoy a story more if I can really visualise the characters
3. Maybe a bit longer chapters, long chapters are usually a good thing, if readers are like me they are drawn to length.
4. Consider getting a beta -reader (did I mention that I've always wanted to be one?) actually I think it was party my fault- we were so excited uploading this thing that we forgot to edit it. There are some spelling/ grammar mistakes and some narrative boo boo's (see me at geo/music for elaboration)
5. Upload more chapters pls.!
6. Have you noticed that I've been extremely nice in this review?
7. Celco would be proud (hahahaha)
anyway it was a really great beginning
make sure you update but only on fridays
and don't obsess about this fic because I won't accept any liability if you fail your HSC!
Claudie :)