for Glazed Crystalline Silicates1/8/2005 c1 
127godawful teen-angst poetry
I love the title and concept of the anthology and the piece, hate the ellipses and the "illumine'd". I'm not sure about your dictionary, but "illuminated" would make more sense and fit better. I like this but think some of the word choice, just little things, isn't great; just making a few slight changes could make this so much better/clearer/more powerful. ie, "Illuminated to reveal".
~lyv
127godawful teen-angst poetryI love the title and concept of the anthology and the piece, hate the ellipses and the "illumine'd". I'm not sure about your dictionary, but "illuminated" would make more sense and fit better. I like this but think some of the word choice, just little things, isn't great; just making a few slight changes could make this so much better/clearer/more powerful. ie, "Illuminated to reveal".
~lyv
10/3/2004 c2 72linaeve
'spectrum' indeed =) brilliant imagery!
and thank-you for the kind review. i'm pleased that you liked 'orange'.
oh, and about that "more reviews = more to come" comment at the bottom of your poem... i hardly think it's kind of you to so coerce readers into reviewing, non? ^^ (i meant that in a lighthearted way, toph.) i rarely get reviews (let alone constructive ones), but i post away happily- that's what poets do, of course.
btw, love the word 'mullioned' [=
-lin
72linaeve'spectrum' indeed =) brilliant imagery!
and thank-you for the kind review. i'm pleased that you liked 'orange'.
oh, and about that "more reviews = more to come" comment at the bottom of your poem... i hardly think it's kind of you to so coerce readers into reviewing, non? ^^ (i meant that in a lighthearted way, toph.) i rarely get reviews (let alone constructive ones), but i post away happily- that's what poets do, of course.
btw, love the word 'mullioned' [=
-lin
10/2/2004 c1 200Ashes of a Willow
Hey, wonderful job! I liked this poem a lot, and yes, you can interpret it in many ways, but it is great! Oh, welcome to fp.com! ^^ and thanks for reviewing my poems!
200Ashes of a WillowHey, wonderful job! I liked this poem a lot, and yes, you can interpret it in many ways, but it is great! Oh, welcome to fp.com! ^^ and thanks for reviewing my poems!
10/2/2004 c2 14Eirian Rhianu
i like this one too! i never new glass could be so pretty...
i like the first poem better, the one that ends in "hues of blinding light", but the other one is good too.
14Eirian Rhianui like this one too! i never new glass could be so pretty...
i like the first poem better, the one that ends in "hues of blinding light", but the other one is good too.
10/1/2004 c1 Eirian Rhianu
I really like this poem...it's so true! and it paints a really great picture
I really like this poem...it's so true! and it paints a really great picture
9/28/2004 c1 72linaeve
i /am/ planning on continuing it.. i've black done already, but i just got back from art (after waiting an hour in the rain for the late bus to came- which it never did) and am feeling... wet. if i wrote 'orange' or 'yellow' now they'd probably be grumpy and miserable.
i'll probably do blue. XD
72linaevei /am/ planning on continuing it.. i've black done already, but i just got back from art (after waiting an hour in the rain for the late bus to came- which it never did) and am feeling... wet. if i wrote 'orange' or 'yellow' now they'd probably be grumpy and miserable.
i'll probably do blue. XD
9/25/2004 c1 67The Juggler 42
I've been staring at it for 5 minutes, and I dont get it. I know its there, I'm just having trouble translating. Even after reading the clarifying definitions you oftered. If only I knew what you were describing- there doesnt seem to be any clue as to the subject other than the title, which doesnt reveal what you're talking about. Two people in love seeing themselves in eachother? Just a guess. That's all I can come up with that fits. But that still doesnt explain the title. Drop me an email, or better, review one of my haikus, and let me know how far off I am.
67The Juggler 42I've been staring at it for 5 minutes, and I dont get it. I know its there, I'm just having trouble translating. Even after reading the clarifying definitions you oftered. If only I knew what you were describing- there doesnt seem to be any clue as to the subject other than the title, which doesnt reveal what you're talking about. Two people in love seeing themselves in eachother? Just a guess. That's all I can come up with that fits. But that still doesnt explain the title. Drop me an email, or better, review one of my haikus, and let me know how far off I am.
9/25/2004 c1 79Groovy Angel
Yes this is very beautiful - I especially like the first and final lines - 'a broken reflection' - I love the imagery on that. Great haiku! (and thankyou very much for your review)
79Groovy AngelYes this is very beautiful - I especially like the first and final lines - 'a broken reflection' - I love the imagery on that. Great haiku! (and thankyou very much for your review)