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9/30/2004 c2 4RisuMusume
Lovely job!...you know I'm going to pick on you for what should be edited...mainly, a lot is two words, notice, 'a lot' not 'alot.' Other than that, great job! Go you! I like the way the story is going!
9/30/2004 c2 sephiroth6270
hey it seems really good i just didnt expect him to run off so soon and how come u very briefly used the mystic room i would have made it a very important part of the story it seemed magical and maybe even dangerous. also it would of been better if u would explain what he looked like and the other characters in more detailo like the horse and his father. And use more descriptive words in ur story. but the story line itself so far seems a great basis for u to maybe even make it better than Lord of the rings.
9/29/2004 c1 RisuMusume
You know what I have to say about the typos...I've already pestered you about almost all of them...you love me anyways! Other than that...interesting you and your friend did a good job!*smiles* Go you!
9/26/2004 c1 Yujia
Good job, I can never write a long chapter like that :-D Um noticed a lot of typos, but it was still legible. N E way, you've come a long way since amazing race YGO style. :-D
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