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for Is Simple Flesh Enough for Love?

7/7/2006 c1 grumpirah
MORE PLEASE!
2/24/2005 c1 4Medron Pryde
Thanks for your reviews of my Terran Front story. I've finished posting the entire story up so you can look at it if you want. For this story I noted that you seemed to switching tenses a fair bit. Going from one viewpoint to another in your actual words. And I found your original explanation of what happened a little bit rushed. You probably could have spread it out a bit more, introducing the main character as she is now a little better and seeding the information in a little bit at a time. As an example, I wouldn't say that she rescued the object from earth before it was destroyed seventeen years ago. I would say earlier in the writing that earth had been wiped out seventeen years ago. THEN I would note towards the end that she took it with her as she fleeing the aliens fleets during the final defense of earth, or something to that effect. It just caught me as a bit rough when I read it. Thanks again for your review and I hope you find this as useful as I found yours.
12/6/2004 c1 3AlienCultist
yes it has been quite a while now hasnt it? neither of us wrote much...but i read like (-) that much off the scroll bar n shall finish it after hw...but tis really good as the others...n its interesting 2 have a grey with soul matrix with the feelings n such

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