for How to Win Her Over11/2/2005 c27 Beldavid the Sorcerer
Woohoo, Co-author credit! wait, damn, does that mean I would actually have to write something? But I'm way too lazy for that, and I'm having a conversation with myself! Ack!
A bit ironic, I must say. It seems Sir stephen did not end up with the drugs, but Davich ends up with Sisilla, not to resurrect a dead battle here, but Cicero, or was it Peshnet, I can't remember what name the dork was using at the time, was completely wrong.
Great story by the way, I liked it almost as much as the Mallorean, and while I say almost as much, that is no insult because Silk is god, and possibly Zakath too, and there's no question about Eriond. What I'm trying to say is excellent novel, and I can't wait for the sequel.
Woohoo, Co-author credit! wait, damn, does that mean I would actually have to write something? But I'm way too lazy for that, and I'm having a conversation with myself! Ack!
A bit ironic, I must say. It seems Sir stephen did not end up with the drugs, but Davich ends up with Sisilla, not to resurrect a dead battle here, but Cicero, or was it Peshnet, I can't remember what name the dork was using at the time, was completely wrong.
Great story by the way, I liked it almost as much as the Mallorean, and while I say almost as much, that is no insult because Silk is god, and possibly Zakath too, and there's no question about Eriond. What I'm trying to say is excellent novel, and I can't wait for the sequel.
11/2/2005 c26 Beldavid the Sorcerer
What was I not supposed to like about this chapter? Apart from not having Davich, it is a wonderful, heartwarming chapter. Earnstheart's quirky personality is always fun to read, the giraffe is certainly someone who Davich would respect, and that says something about him. He is one of my favorite characters. So, great chapter
What was I not supposed to like about this chapter? Apart from not having Davich, it is a wonderful, heartwarming chapter. Earnstheart's quirky personality is always fun to read, the giraffe is certainly someone who Davich would respect, and that says something about him. He is one of my favorite characters. So, great chapter
10/23/2005 c1 Forland
Yay, it's done, I'll miss reading this, then again, i can read it anytime I want. Good job.
Yay, it's done, I'll miss reading this, then again, i can read it anytime I want. Good job.
10/17/2005 c25 Forland
Brilliant. Just thought I'd let you know your not the only one who has slumped into summer writer's block. I still need to update. Anyway, sorry CI for bringing up the cleric. I'm not sure i got the full blast of the story because I was listening to hypnotize in the backround. Keep it up.
Brilliant. Just thought I'd let you know your not the only one who has slumped into summer writer's block. I still need to update. Anyway, sorry CI for bringing up the cleric. I'm not sure i got the full blast of the story because I was listening to hypnotize in the backround. Keep it up.
10/17/2005 c1 maskedtears
IT'S LAUREN! this is Liz...hurray for story! i can't wait to catch up on it...Steve and them told me about it and how they are some of the characters so I'm really excited...well ttyl...liz
IT'S LAUREN! this is Liz...hurray for story! i can't wait to catch up on it...Steve and them told me about it and how they are some of the characters so I'm really excited...well ttyl...liz
9/28/2005 c25 Beldavid the Sorcerer
Yay! the climax, and the true and clear emergence of the protagonist. Though, the antagonist is debatable, and that's what makes this fun. Well, actually, not so much the climax, but the chapter that clarifies the last chapter as the climax, reading straight through makes realizing these things a bit dodgy. This chapter was good enough to pull me away from "Stewie Griffin; The Untold Story" for a short time, and that says something, especially if one has seen it. Oh, and loved the accent mark over the e in belovéd, its too perfect.
Yay! the climax, and the true and clear emergence of the protagonist. Though, the antagonist is debatable, and that's what makes this fun. Well, actually, not so much the climax, but the chapter that clarifies the last chapter as the climax, reading straight through makes realizing these things a bit dodgy. This chapter was good enough to pull me away from "Stewie Griffin; The Untold Story" for a short time, and that says something, especially if one has seen it. Oh, and loved the accent mark over the e in belovéd, its too perfect.
9/25/2005 c24 
5B.Laures
THIS IS BEAUTIFUL! I think I'm going to cry! Well-done, double thumbs up!-Briette Julienne Laures-
5B.LauresTHIS IS BEAUTIFUL! I think I'm going to cry! Well-done, double thumbs up!-Briette Julienne Laures-
9/24/2005 c24 CI
In response to your query, Beldavid:
Yes, he's still a cleric. Just not in terms of Lillium's story.
In response to your query, Beldavid:
Yes, he's still a cleric. Just not in terms of Lillium's story.
9/23/2005 c24 Beldavid the Sorceror
I response to Cryptic Identity's first two queries, yes.
And I though Earnstheart was still a cleric, did he die or something?
And I still assert that this chapter is perfect, so perfect that it transcends perfection, so much so, that I am going to invent a word right here on the spot to describe it... hagweur! Yes, this chapter is hagweur.
I response to Cryptic Identity's first two queries, yes.
And I though Earnstheart was still a cleric, did he die or something?
And I still assert that this chapter is perfect, so perfect that it transcends perfection, so much so, that I am going to invent a word right here on the spot to describe it... hagweur! Yes, this chapter is hagweur.
9/21/2005 c24 Beldavid the Sorcerer
Alright, already! Get on with the story!Sorry, I just had to do that. Anyways, I can't see why you think that this chapter could possibly need a rewrite, I personally think it is perfect. Of course, I am extremely biased in my complete loathing of Stephen and at the same time my lauding, did I spell that right, I can't remember if its ua or au, anyways, my lauding of Davich. But I still think it is beautiful, it even brought a tear to my eye, I was so proud.
Alright, already! Get on with the story!Sorry, I just had to do that. Anyways, I can't see why you think that this chapter could possibly need a rewrite, I personally think it is perfect. Of course, I am extremely biased in my complete loathing of Stephen and at the same time my lauding, did I spell that right, I can't remember if its ua or au, anyways, my lauding of Davich. But I still think it is beautiful, it even brought a tear to my eye, I was so proud.
9/21/2005 c23 Beldavid the Sorcerer
Ha Ha Ha HAH HA! (incredibly smug grin appears on my face) It is about time this happened. It took me forever to find time to review! Took long enough for Stephen's predestined downfall to finally occur too. the only thing I don't get is the part where Stephen was pretending to be interested in the stone wall, I would think that he would be fascinated, it is by far more interesting than him, by far less shallow. Oh yeah! (in true Quagmire fashion)
Ha Ha Ha HAH HA! (incredibly smug grin appears on my face) It is about time this happened. It took me forever to find time to review! Took long enough for Stephen's predestined downfall to finally occur too. the only thing I don't get is the part where Stephen was pretending to be interested in the stone wall, I would think that he would be fascinated, it is by far more interesting than him, by far less shallow. Oh yeah! (in true Quagmire fashion)
9/20/2005 c24 2CrypticIdentity
Oh, dear. Davich. Dost thou need more blood on thy hands? Wilt thou continue thy onslaught until thou hast murdered all of the main characters?
...O. For some reason, I didn't recall you telling me Stephen would die until I started reading this chapter. So it sort of came as a surprise. I agree, though; this chapter could have been done better. Allow me to be meticulous with my critique for a moment: 1. "What've" for some reaosn looks weird to me, what with the time period and all. 2. You probably could elaborated on Stephen's feelings as he left the hall; i.e., what he could do now, what might happen to him, replaying the scene in his head. 3. The staging for Stephen's death probably could've been done better. Leaving the identity of his killer until the last line was good, but the rest seemed a little...bland. I mean, when Davich killed Kevion, it was perfect, because it was completely out of the blue, but this is definitely a more momentous occasion in the story, so could probably be built up a bit more, once again, possibly going deeper into Stephen's dying thoughts. I mean, I'm not being sympathetic towards Stephen; I just think since he's a main character and these are his dying moments he should probably be given more attention in these last moments.
Sorry for being so critical :( . I just feel that this chapter could've been done better. You can completely disregard my comments if you feel the need; it's your story.
With the deepest respect,-CI
2CrypticIdentityOh, dear. Davich. Dost thou need more blood on thy hands? Wilt thou continue thy onslaught until thou hast murdered all of the main characters?
...O. For some reason, I didn't recall you telling me Stephen would die until I started reading this chapter. So it sort of came as a surprise. I agree, though; this chapter could have been done better. Allow me to be meticulous with my critique for a moment: 1. "What've" for some reaosn looks weird to me, what with the time period and all. 2. You probably could elaborated on Stephen's feelings as he left the hall; i.e., what he could do now, what might happen to him, replaying the scene in his head. 3. The staging for Stephen's death probably could've been done better. Leaving the identity of his killer until the last line was good, but the rest seemed a little...bland. I mean, when Davich killed Kevion, it was perfect, because it was completely out of the blue, but this is definitely a more momentous occasion in the story, so could probably be built up a bit more, once again, possibly going deeper into Stephen's dying thoughts. I mean, I'm not being sympathetic towards Stephen; I just think since he's a main character and these are his dying moments he should probably be given more attention in these last moments.
Sorry for being so critical :( . I just feel that this chapter could've been done better. You can completely disregard my comments if you feel the need; it's your story.
With the deepest respect,-CI
9/19/2005 c24 x funky koala x
.:claps:. you finally updated, I'm very happy. :D
Am I the only one who feels bad for Stephen? Eh, probably, I'm just a softy.
.:claps:. you finally updated, I'm very happy. :D
Am I the only one who feels bad for Stephen? Eh, probably, I'm just a softy.
8/1/2005 c22 Forland
Finally caught up, wow, Sir Stephen is getting his heart ripped out. I think I had that happen to me once. Keep up the good work.
Finally caught up, wow, Sir Stephen is getting his heart ripped out. I think I had that happen to me once. Keep up the good work.