for Underneath5/2/2005 c1 
10Aimee-Louise
I like the basic plot, but the way the story flows doesn't go very well. Maybe go a little slower, you know, stay on the subject of the therapy and problems with the mother for a while and get a little deeper into it. And for the Jen part, I thought that was really cute, and the paragraph did flow a little bit better. You said critisism, so I'm just telling you. I do like the plot, though. Really, not lying.
10Aimee-LouiseI like the basic plot, but the way the story flows doesn't go very well. Maybe go a little slower, you know, stay on the subject of the therapy and problems with the mother for a while and get a little deeper into it. And for the Jen part, I thought that was really cute, and the paragraph did flow a little bit better. You said critisism, so I'm just telling you. I do like the plot, though. Really, not lying.