Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for The Intake of Breath

2/3/2006 c1 40Ice Dagger
Wow ... it's powerful and deep. I love the rhyme scheme, too. Very well written!
12/13/2005 c1 83White is a Sin
ooh, how morbid, prettifuls

man i love those words, morbid prettifuls, heh
12/17/2004 c1 53Impressionist
the last three lines completely made the poem. well done:)
11/30/2004 c1 23Quilir
Very intresting *nods*Though, with the other requests you are giving the anonymous person, you don't offer one at the end. Its just a simple plead for them to stop breathing. Every other request you make valid, but that one. I'm wondering why. The last section too, doesn't make much sense after the request to stop breathing. Well, in comparison to the previous stanzas of the poem.
11/30/2004 c1 196Damaged
^_^ I love this poem!
11/28/2004 c1 12restless-wandering
oh, i like it, the rhyme scheme is really cool too. It's kind of angsty in a subtle way. Excellent work :)

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service