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for Forest Walk

6/5/2012 c1 savor those enticing dreams
the imagery here is fantastic, and i love the push and pull that's inherent in this entire poem - the fight between lust and responsibility (although i really hate to use that word - it's more self-control than responsibility). either way, it was very well written - bravo!
2/22/2011 c1 19Twyla Cole
I really enjoyed this. I had to read it a couple of times, go through it slow to piece it all together.

Using the word "fuck" in the beginning set me up for a blatant poem but is definitely the last thing I got. However, "fuck" doesn't seem to disrupt, which is good!

I got a little lost here and there, but at first read the constant language gives a sense of the clouded chaos of love/lust. I love the line "yet we could pour your intuition under/ my tongue" LOVED IT! It was a moment of "let's hid all of our problems in one another and maybe they will all go away." At least that is what I got from it. The whole third stanza is awesome.

You tell a great story, though it isn't evident at first glance. But the cat and mouse, I want you but I can't do this anymore becomes apparent. I do love the disdain that comes into the last few moments of the poem. I also like the affection or acceptance that is presented to the "raven" almost like you have decided to not care that the lover is "nevermore" dismissing the pain that Poe went through for something else.

I really enjoyed the piece! Good Job.


Twyla Cole
1/4/2011 c1 11Siren-esque
Beautiful and slightly confusing, just as love/lust is. Love the nod to Poe also.
12/11/2010 c1 17estrellas
i love this. its smooth style and format, the weather imagery, the closeness and distance. it's really quite beautiful.
3/12/2010 c1 167nickyO
Vivid imagery coupled with clear cut prose. The push and pull of the relationship, the confused wanting and not wanting at the same time is written beautifully. Love that ending too.
6/2/2005 c1 127godawful teen-angst poetry
you're amazing. lovely in a gray, straind and breaking way.
4/30/2005 c1 31broken shard of twilight
This was, simply put, amazing. The words are perfect, they really are. I want to be able to say what I liked best, but it's impossible. To me, for poetry to be good, it has to mean something. It has to affect me, make me feel it. You have achieved that. This is one of the highest compliments I can give. I look forward to reading more of your work. ...(I've decided the first and third stazas are my favorites.)
3/24/2005 c1 156ShadowPharoh
i like how you didn't capitolize, it gives your writing personality. overal: loved the poem! great poem, greater poet.

1/23/2005 c1 102Joewhatever
I love the third to last stanza and everything after that. "do i have to show you disdain if i want you to run after me" amazing. I wasn't sure about the first part, but you pull it together at the end. Great job! I love it!:D

12/25/2004 c1 47like a lover
holy bejeebus! this was so pretty. i loved the last line. (oh, and thanks for your review!)
12/15/2004 c1 51Spider-Matt
I like it. It really represents a lot of teenage drama. As much as I hate the lot of it, I like the poem because the expresses feelings that I believe a lot of people feel.The only problem I had, being the Poe wonk that I am, is the "nevermore" reference at the end. If this is supposed to be a Poe reference, as it takes the appearance of being, then it was a raven, not a crow. That's all. I'm just a geek about such things. ^_^

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