for Hunter2/25/2014 c17 Angels Have Faith
it's.. good. but whenever i read it.. it feels like i'm watching an action movie. it doesn't feel like a story, but a movie. but its good, i think.
-Zeela
it's.. good. but whenever i read it.. it feels like i'm watching an action movie. it doesn't feel like a story, but a movie. but its good, i think.
-Zeela
3/20/2013 c24 
2Ceskasi
Hiya It's me, again :D I reviewed your other fic yesterday and today I read this fic.
I don't know what to say. You make the best stories pretty close to reality. Although I saw a few mistakes they were no biggie.
I don't know if making the ending like that is a good thing but I'll just say it's the most appropriate one.
I knew Jessica was evil right from the start! I hate how she manipulates people but I don't think that she's wrong about her opinion on Jack.
I also sensed that something lacked when Lia finally saw her brother.
Cal. I don't even know how to start! He's just not one of my favorite characterr. I swear he's downright diabolical and full of pent-up hate.
My favorite character is Carmon(?). Yeah... He's my favorite but I can't seem to remember the right spelling of his name. I wish that you made him appear more in the story. I love how he died. Leigh and the other persone, Emilie(?)... That part just made me want to tear up! I swear, I'm tearing up right now remembering that scene. How they didn't know that he's dead and it's his birthday! I don't want to imagine what their reactions would be when they find out. It's pulling my heartstrings.
Your plot is great. It focuses on something actually important and something to talk about.
Why are you just so damn good.
Oh yeah, those racist jokes were unbelievable. Especially the apple one. So horrible. I'll never forget them. I hope no one would have to hear other people say that to them.
I can't believe I'm actually giving out a long review. I would usually just say that the fic was good but you made me WANT to write a LONG review. You deserve it.
Stay smart and wise ;)
-Ces
2CeskasiHiya It's me, again :D I reviewed your other fic yesterday and today I read this fic.
I don't know what to say. You make the best stories pretty close to reality. Although I saw a few mistakes they were no biggie.
I don't know if making the ending like that is a good thing but I'll just say it's the most appropriate one.
I knew Jessica was evil right from the start! I hate how she manipulates people but I don't think that she's wrong about her opinion on Jack.
I also sensed that something lacked when Lia finally saw her brother.
Cal. I don't even know how to start! He's just not one of my favorite characterr. I swear he's downright diabolical and full of pent-up hate.
My favorite character is Carmon(?). Yeah... He's my favorite but I can't seem to remember the right spelling of his name. I wish that you made him appear more in the story. I love how he died. Leigh and the other persone, Emilie(?)... That part just made me want to tear up! I swear, I'm tearing up right now remembering that scene. How they didn't know that he's dead and it's his birthday! I don't want to imagine what their reactions would be when they find out. It's pulling my heartstrings.
Your plot is great. It focuses on something actually important and something to talk about.
Why are you just so damn good.
Oh yeah, those racist jokes were unbelievable. Especially the apple one. So horrible. I'll never forget them. I hope no one would have to hear other people say that to them.
I can't believe I'm actually giving out a long review. I would usually just say that the fic was good but you made me WANT to write a LONG review. You deserve it.
Stay smart and wise ;)
-Ces
7/20/2012 c16 JustaFallen21
Oh wow, I really love this fanfic! It is so amazingly written! The whole idea of it is just...fasinating! And I love Cal now! His chemistry with Lia is just so perfect!
Love your writing!
-HuntressBlade12
Oh wow, I really love this fanfic! It is so amazingly written! The whole idea of it is just...fasinating! And I love Cal now! His chemistry with Lia is just so perfect!
Love your writing!
-HuntressBlade12
6/9/2012 c24 vampireprincess003
Omg why why why why why why why why why why why why why D: how can u end it like this! I DEMAND A SEQUAL OR JUST A FEW MORE CHAPETERS : I just wanted to say tha very good writer and I love all of ur story's and I'm very sad of the endings lien it breaks my heart with all the lying and betrayals reading ur story's I have found that I'm a person who likes happy endings. Don get me wrong I absolutely love all of them. It they make me sad. Like this one I have so many questions and it's not fair that u just ended I like that. Cal makes me so mad I just wanna shoot him n the face it broke my heart wat he did to Lia.
Omg why why why why why why why why why why why why why D: how can u end it like this! I DEMAND A SEQUAL OR JUST A FEW MORE CHAPETERS : I just wanted to say tha very good writer and I love all of ur story's and I'm very sad of the endings lien it breaks my heart with all the lying and betrayals reading ur story's I have found that I'm a person who likes happy endings. Don get me wrong I absolutely love all of them. It they make me sad. Like this one I have so many questions and it's not fair that u just ended I like that. Cal makes me so mad I just wanna shoot him n the face it broke my heart wat he did to Lia.
10/8/2011 c24 We Used To Wait
This really isn't a good review, if you could even call it one. But you said you did leave the ending open? So I guess the crumbling of the blade of grass signified that she may be wrong about Cal leaving her forever. I hope so, cos then that means she can escape!
Er... still not really sure of Jack's fate.
But yeah, if there is one big thing I really think that needs to be improved upon, it's Lia and Jack's relationship. I love Jack's POV in the very end, when he think about his family and reaches out to memories of his mother, but there wasn't much happening between Lia and him. Not many feelings or thoughts explained there. Since he was mentioned in the summary, most people and myself included thought he was integral to the importance of this story. Or Lia's story, at least...
I do disagree with someone who left a review about finding a solution to the race problem or something. There will never be a solution or development of sorts regarding racism. It will always exist, so in my opinion, racism just being present in the story (just being THERE) without further reason is okay. Because that's like how it is in our world, as well. If you want to write a story based on racism, fine. No solution, experiments, or predictions are necessary.
I feel so so so sorry for Cameron. Just saying.
Man, really sorry for a terrible review (but not really a review). Just explaining my thoughts, here. Since I think you kinda lost all care for this story, anyway. Lol
This really isn't a good review, if you could even call it one. But you said you did leave the ending open? So I guess the crumbling of the blade of grass signified that she may be wrong about Cal leaving her forever. I hope so, cos then that means she can escape!
Er... still not really sure of Jack's fate.
But yeah, if there is one big thing I really think that needs to be improved upon, it's Lia and Jack's relationship. I love Jack's POV in the very end, when he think about his family and reaches out to memories of his mother, but there wasn't much happening between Lia and him. Not many feelings or thoughts explained there. Since he was mentioned in the summary, most people and myself included thought he was integral to the importance of this story. Or Lia's story, at least...
I do disagree with someone who left a review about finding a solution to the race problem or something. There will never be a solution or development of sorts regarding racism. It will always exist, so in my opinion, racism just being present in the story (just being THERE) without further reason is okay. Because that's like how it is in our world, as well. If you want to write a story based on racism, fine. No solution, experiments, or predictions are necessary.
I feel so so so sorry for Cameron. Just saying.
Man, really sorry for a terrible review (but not really a review). Just explaining my thoughts, here. Since I think you kinda lost all care for this story, anyway. Lol
10/19/2010 c3 2bubublacz
This sounds interesting. I have high hopes though a bit cautious because this chapter sounds a bit confusing.
Are Lia and Jack really siblings?
It was weird how he talked back to his sister like that. Yeah, sure he's rude but it sounded like something was there. And you said, she was 14 can i presume that the brother is younger? Say, 12? Does he have sex with girls already or am I reading it wrong?
Also, I think that criticisms are a good way to make your writing better that is if you want to be a good writer in the future.
2bubublaczThis sounds interesting. I have high hopes though a bit cautious because this chapter sounds a bit confusing.
Are Lia and Jack really siblings?
It was weird how he talked back to his sister like that. Yeah, sure he's rude but it sounded like something was there. And you said, she was 14 can i presume that the brother is younger? Say, 12? Does he have sex with girls already or am I reading it wrong?
Also, I think that criticisms are a good way to make your writing better that is if you want to be a good writer in the future.
7/29/2009 c4 3Im Just Mlssundaztood
I love the song.
Honestly, they aren't many people that are totally confident with themselves. Pretend you are okay, don't let them walk all over you.
Love the story so far.
-Im Just Mlssundaztood
3Im Just MlssundaztoodI love the song.
Honestly, they aren't many people that are totally confident with themselves. Pretend you are okay, don't let them walk all over you.
Love the story so far.
-Im Just Mlssundaztood
7/20/2009 c7 2akaCHEEKS
alright. you know what? i am hella sorry. but god this is just boring me to death. its like one of those action movies that just drags on. but there's really no action to keep the viewers engaged. shit. i am hella sorry. it must be a really good story in all to get all those reviews.. but i feel like maybe you should cut down on your chapters. they are so incredibly long that i start to feel sleepy reading it. you describe every little detail that goes on! its ok to skip some and get straight to the point sweetie. but for writing this at age 13 though, props to you man!
2akaCHEEKSalright. you know what? i am hella sorry. but god this is just boring me to death. its like one of those action movies that just drags on. but there's really no action to keep the viewers engaged. shit. i am hella sorry. it must be a really good story in all to get all those reviews.. but i feel like maybe you should cut down on your chapters. they are so incredibly long that i start to feel sleepy reading it. you describe every little detail that goes on! its ok to skip some and get straight to the point sweetie. but for writing this at age 13 though, props to you man!
6/8/2009 c2 14chaos.into.shadow
Hey,
looks good, just wondering, is this an incest story?
~chaos.into.shadow
14chaos.into.shadowHey,
looks good, just wondering, is this an incest story?
~chaos.into.shadow
5/25/2009 c3 2akaCHEEKS
man for all the writing that you've done. i think you deserve more than 200something+ reviews!
2akaCHEEKSman for all the writing that you've done. i think you deserve more than 200something+ reviews!
5/25/2009 c1 akaCHEEKS
ooh caught my attention with your preview! woah. sounds interested already. definately a hook, line, and sinker material!
ooh caught my attention with your preview! woah. sounds interested already. definately a hook, line, and sinker material!
10/15/2008 c1 2The Dumbing Down Of Love
Another thing - the summary for this one is pretty dodgy...grammatical errors...and just general lack of sense. I probably wouldn't have read it, looking at the summary, but it was from you, so...
2The Dumbing Down Of LoveAnother thing - the summary for this one is pretty dodgy...grammatical errors...and just general lack of sense. I probably wouldn't have read it, looking at the summary, but it was from you, so...
10/15/2008 c24 The Dumbing Down Of Love
The ending was way too ambiguous =(
It didn't really feel like an ending.
But hey, I love it a lot more than I would have if it ended with 'and they all lived happily ever after'. Those endings are always boring.
And Catharsis IS better! Despite the whole...boarding school setting...I love it anyway.
By the way, are you ever planning to finish Predator? Cause that's definitely my favourite fic of yours. And it's been so long...and you're almost done! Dying of curiosity here! Oh, and are you ever gonna say who Predator, Producer and Consumer are? Dying of curiosity about that too.
- Saranya.
The ending was way too ambiguous =(
It didn't really feel like an ending.
But hey, I love it a lot more than I would have if it ended with 'and they all lived happily ever after'. Those endings are always boring.
And Catharsis IS better! Despite the whole...boarding school setting...I love it anyway.
By the way, are you ever planning to finish Predator? Cause that's definitely my favourite fic of yours. And it's been so long...and you're almost done! Dying of curiosity here! Oh, and are you ever gonna say who Predator, Producer and Consumer are? Dying of curiosity about that too.
- Saranya.
10/15/2008 c20 The Dumbing Down Of Love
...I'm a little confused about why they would want to kill Jack, of all the sector heads...Why would they kill the Cadlian one?
...I'm a little confused about why they would want to kill Jack, of all the sector heads...Why would they kill the Cadlian one?