Just In
for Aryk's Tale

3/3/2005 c2 7Mafortion
Same as chapter one.
3/3/2005 c1 Mafortion
Very good! The only thing that I have to say is that I might have changed some of the vocab.
1/5/2005 c2 1Until This Echo
I like the characters a lot, especially Althaeas. They've got potential. (well, Aryk, but you know what I mean)

A couple suggestions, though. Try to describe a tad bit more, not overly so, but a little. Whenever they pause, (perhaps when Aryk and company are waiting?) do a little thinking, character development.

I'm gonna be looking for more additions. ^_^; Don't let me down.It's a great story. I'll be adding this to my favorites.
1/3/2005 c1 1Ceridwen Rohbyn
I love the story! But just a little advice. I saw that you would often describe an action like "They Followed their master silently, but where stopped again." Try to describe a bit of what these characters are thinking and a little bit more on their surroundings. All in all though, it was great!

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service