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for Hero

1/25/2005 c1 p-esc
This was utterly amazing. I was captivated right from the start. You created the battle scene EXTREMELY well, and I truly felt as if I was there.

Just a couple of minor things though...

"The battles has begun."

I don't know if you meant "The battles have begun" or "The battle has begun"...but that line doesn't really make much sense.

Also, some of your lines feel a little too short so that this poem doesn't flow as smoothly as it could.

Other than those two things, I think you did some seriously PHENOMENAL work here. You should be very proud!:D Keep writing!
1/5/2005 c1 Warrior Minstrel
A friend suggested I read your poetry for she thought I would like it. She was right! This is wonderful! You captured the battle so beautifully. Please keep writing!

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