for An Average Story11/28/2005 c11 AznCarmii
I skimmed most of this story but it was really good. I think this fits in the romance section more than the general section. Anyways,I hope you update soon.
I skimmed most of this story but it was really good. I think this fits in the romance section more than the general section. Anyways,I hope you update soon.
11/26/2005 c11 hey
This is a really good story, I really hope you continue on with this story, because you really should. And if you don't, I'll kill you. ;) haha, okay, just kidding, but really, continue this story!
This is a really good story, I really hope you continue on with this story, because you really should. And if you don't, I'll kill you. ;) haha, okay, just kidding, but really, continue this story!
11/24/2005 c11 
5Deena
I found this story via the FP_Review community on Livejournal and I'm so glad that it was recced. This story is absolutely wonderfully cooltastic. It's become my new favourite story and the jewel of my Favourite's List.
It's just so fresh. Elise is such an awesome protagonist...she's not that annoying, bitchy sarcastic that we see in so many stories these days but she's still quirky and fun without trying too hard. I love the way she hounds Spencer and makes fun of Brandy. I love that she's got no qualms about blackmailing Miss Prince and letting herself be used by Jared. She's a very three dimensional character without drowning in angst. Plus how sweet is her relationship with Jesse? They're adorable.
I know you haven't updated in a while but I really hope that you'll consider doing so, I'm very eager to find out what happens. This story is too much fun and the tone is too original to be abandoned.
-Deena
5DeenaI found this story via the FP_Review community on Livejournal and I'm so glad that it was recced. This story is absolutely wonderfully cooltastic. It's become my new favourite story and the jewel of my Favourite's List.
It's just so fresh. Elise is such an awesome protagonist...she's not that annoying, bitchy sarcastic that we see in so many stories these days but she's still quirky and fun without trying too hard. I love the way she hounds Spencer and makes fun of Brandy. I love that she's got no qualms about blackmailing Miss Prince and letting herself be used by Jared. She's a very three dimensional character without drowning in angst. Plus how sweet is her relationship with Jesse? They're adorable.
I know you haven't updated in a while but I really hope that you'll consider doing so, I'm very eager to find out what happens. This story is too much fun and the tone is too original to be abandoned.
-Deena
11/23/2005 c11 6Lainiee
So, this story came recommended to me, and usually if I have the time I'll browse through it and a lot of times it's not worth it.
I have to say though, that this was a really pleasant surprise. It reminds me alot of that novel Sloppy Firsts by... I forget the author... Anyway, I like your characters a lot, and I love how there's no 'he's so hot' gushing about Jesse, and I like how despite the fact that he wasn't introduced as attractive, and you point out realistic notions like how it's pretty nasty that he hasn't showered in a bit. As for the Spencer deal, I'm wondering if he's gonna be playing a bigger part in the story, because of his angsty little hatred towards Elise. And so on and so forth.Excellent, excellent. Oh, and one of the best points, is that Elise is sarcastic but it's not stressed on. One thing that annoys me about most stories on this site is that the girls, when saracastic are overly so and it's just annoying and unrealistic. So keep it up, and hope to see a recent post soon.
6LainieeSo, this story came recommended to me, and usually if I have the time I'll browse through it and a lot of times it's not worth it.
I have to say though, that this was a really pleasant surprise. It reminds me alot of that novel Sloppy Firsts by... I forget the author... Anyway, I like your characters a lot, and I love how there's no 'he's so hot' gushing about Jesse, and I like how despite the fact that he wasn't introduced as attractive, and you point out realistic notions like how it's pretty nasty that he hasn't showered in a bit. As for the Spencer deal, I'm wondering if he's gonna be playing a bigger part in the story, because of his angsty little hatred towards Elise. And so on and so forth.Excellent, excellent. Oh, and one of the best points, is that Elise is sarcastic but it's not stressed on. One thing that annoys me about most stories on this site is that the girls, when saracastic are overly so and it's just annoying and unrealistic. So keep it up, and hope to see a recent post soon.
5/25/2005 c11 36Eye of the Needle
I just read all of this! It's amazing, you've got some talent for an average girl
36Eye of the NeedleI just read all of this! It's amazing, you've got some talent for an average girl
5/25/2005 c11 18flameofcarrie
Glad to see you updating again! I was wondering about this story recently. Update again soon!
18flameofcarrieGlad to see you updating again! I was wondering about this story recently. Update again soon!
2/23/2005 c10 1The Restock Bandits
Lovely chapter. ::laughs:: I still love Spencer to death; he's so angry that it's cute.
1The Restock BanditsLovely chapter. ::laughs:: I still love Spencer to death; he's so angry that it's cute.
2/20/2005 c10 ku
3 in the morning now.
this story has a lot of stuff happening at once. the story with the maths teacher, the story with the father, the story with jesse... try not to have too many different stories going on as this may confuse ppl.
3 in the morning now.
this story has a lot of stuff happening at once. the story with the maths teacher, the story with the father, the story with jesse... try not to have too many different stories going on as this may confuse ppl.
2/20/2005 c9 criticizor
This is just a personal thing but I really don't like the character Jesse, the way he always tries to kiss Elise.
"I almos6t expected her to say..."
This is just a personal thing but I really don't like the character Jesse, the way he always tries to kiss Elise.
"I almos6t expected her to say..."
2/20/2005 c8 the criticizer
too many overexagerrated similes "towering over me like the Empire State Building." "that was about as appealing as eating a cup full of maggots"
too many overexagerrated similes "towering over me like the Empire State Building." "that was about as appealing as eating a cup full of maggots"
2/20/2005 c7 ku
Error here: “What are you going here?” I asked him.
Couple of other minor typo errors. Just read over and correct.
Error here: “What are you going here?” I asked him.
Couple of other minor typo errors. Just read over and correct.