for With In The Shadows3/29/2005 c3 
14Storysmith
Pretty good, though it was a little confusing in some places where you forgot a verb in the sentence or confused tenses or had plural with a singular noun (and vice versa) A proofread would catch most of these things. Good chapter though. So he isn't all alone. Yay! Good Job! Later!
GdlN
14StorysmithPretty good, though it was a little confusing in some places where you forgot a verb in the sentence or confused tenses or had plural with a singular noun (and vice versa) A proofread would catch most of these things. Good chapter though. So he isn't all alone. Yay! Good Job! Later!
GdlN
3/11/2005 c2 Storysmith
Hello. Interesting idea. Pretty good so far. But there is a problem. I understand you don't have a spell check (maybe try a different program to write, if that's possible), but sometimes the meaning becomes a little unclear because of mispellings and typos. If you can't find a spell check, maybe have someone proofread it before you put it up, or read through it yourself. I sympathize, 'cause I would be dead without spell check and my Grammar-philic friends. Great concept. INteresting character. Love the way he thinks and refuses to give up. A little polishing and this will be amazing! Waiting for More!
Gata de la Noche
Hello. Interesting idea. Pretty good so far. But there is a problem. I understand you don't have a spell check (maybe try a different program to write, if that's possible), but sometimes the meaning becomes a little unclear because of mispellings and typos. If you can't find a spell check, maybe have someone proofread it before you put it up, or read through it yourself. I sympathize, 'cause I would be dead without spell check and my Grammar-philic friends. Great concept. INteresting character. Love the way he thinks and refuses to give up. A little polishing and this will be amazing! Waiting for More!
Gata de la Noche
3/11/2005 c2 Miss Yukishiro
What misson? I love it! It's sad, how he knows there are no survivors, and yet he still has the sthrength to hope, just to get it crushed everytime. I can't wait to find out what hapens next, so update soon! (Maybe you can go read my Fic? Please?) JA NE!
What misson? I love it! It's sad, how he knows there are no survivors, and yet he still has the sthrength to hope, just to get it crushed everytime. I can't wait to find out what hapens next, so update soon! (Maybe you can go read my Fic? Please?) JA NE!
3/11/2005 c1 Miss Yukishiro
No! Ryu! Fight fight fight! Wow, great story idea! Ok, going to read the next chapter. Great job! Ja NE!
No! Ryu! Fight fight fight! Wow, great story idea! Ok, going to read the next chapter. Great job! Ja NE!
3/2/2005 c1 7gingerbeer
Your story concept is very good, but there are lots of grammar errors. If you improved on those, no doubt you will go far!
7gingerbeerYour story concept is very good, but there are lots of grammar errors. If you improved on those, no doubt you will go far!