for M is for Murder3/15/2005 c1 
1Redd13
Good job, its a solid intro chappie without being overdramatic. It already shows you what's to be expected in the story. One little bit of advice, try to let the reader get to know the character first, maybe putting a lengthier description before putting the profession and everything. By showing that Anzuru is a PI right at the beginning readers already establish the idea that he's probably hardcore and everything.
1Redd13Good job, its a solid intro chappie without being overdramatic. It already shows you what's to be expected in the story. One little bit of advice, try to let the reader get to know the character first, maybe putting a lengthier description before putting the profession and everything. By showing that Anzuru is a PI right at the beginning readers already establish the idea that he's probably hardcore and everything.
3/15/2005 c1 kamui-kun
WOW! You seemed to have improved a lot since you last wrote. WOW! This is plainly great You really have one of the most beautiful writing styles here on this site. It's simple, concise and yet very powerful. This first chapter just proves your outstanding talent once more. Needless to say, I really loved how you detailedly described Anzuru's character through this monologue, and I guess the rest of the following chapters would just further emphasize his detatched outlook on his work.
Must say that this is a pretty interesting start. Never really got that much chance to read a pure mystery novel, so this would be one of those rare chances. My only irk... I'm not that fond of the title. It seems kinda overused to a point. But aside from that, everything else I've read up to this point seems promising. Keep it up and I'll keep on reading out of sheer admiration for your style.
WOW! You seemed to have improved a lot since you last wrote. WOW! This is plainly great You really have one of the most beautiful writing styles here on this site. It's simple, concise and yet very powerful. This first chapter just proves your outstanding talent once more. Needless to say, I really loved how you detailedly described Anzuru's character through this monologue, and I guess the rest of the following chapters would just further emphasize his detatched outlook on his work.
Must say that this is a pretty interesting start. Never really got that much chance to read a pure mystery novel, so this would be one of those rare chances. My only irk... I'm not that fond of the title. It seems kinda overused to a point. But aside from that, everything else I've read up to this point seems promising. Keep it up and I'll keep on reading out of sheer admiration for your style.