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for Suddenly Slowly

4/3/2006 c6 Warbling Wallaby
Awesome story... I just wish it could read more of it. I read it last night, and I kept telling myself that I had to go to sleep, but I couldn't stop, and I ended up sleeping what I consider late. (I'm one of those people who sleep disgustingly early). This story left me hanging and it was hard to go to sleep afterwards. Yeah... I'm also one of those people who hate to go to sleep before finishing a good story. LoL. Great job by the way, I love it.
4/3/2006 c6 1Starlilly
This story is amazing! I got pulled in right away, and when I got to the end of the sixth chapter it was like a slap in the face, that I had to stop reading. I really hope that you update this soon!
4/3/2006 c6 Tina
This is an interesting story and i'd really like to read more of it. I think you asked for some constructive critism, and the only thing that i can think of is that you're missing a few words here and there, but they're insignificant. but other than that things are good! oh and update soon! it's been since last year dude! I'd hate to see a good story like this go to waste ;-) keep it up!
4/2/2006 c6 1Jaeiyola
Aw, wonderful job. I love how the story is told in flash-backs. Amazing chapters, continue soon!
4/2/2006 c6 mazee
wow, this is a great story. wonderfully written, i love the characters...keep it up!
4/2/2006 c6 liquid
the story is great, but you haven't updated in ages!
4/2/2006 c6 uh ya
dude you need to update

nice start but it has not really gotten to anything really intense...I am intrigued by Gavin and Hal's relationship and eager to find out how it plays out. bravo on the writing so far.
4/1/2006 c6 Alyssa
Wow! Such a fabulous idea for a story. I hope you update soon! :)

The only thing I suggest, is that you get a beta. You know, just for those tense issues and typos.
3/31/2006 c6 7skywriter-x
awesomeness as usual. i'm not usually into the flashbakc thing in general, but it works for this story, so kudos to you. Jb
3/31/2006 c5 Skywriter-x
dude, the song was excellent. i loved it, and the moment was perfect. excellent work.JB
3/31/2006 c3 skywriter-x
another good chapter. you can really sense the chemistry between the two, its kind of amazing. and the description of the band was excellent.

keep it up,JB
3/31/2006 c2 skywriter-x
dude, awesome story. it's got a very addictive style, and i'm pretty much hooked (then again, i have a thing for musicians)=) moving on to read the enxt chapter...JB
3/31/2006 c6 elizabeth73
Wow! What a great story! You really have a way with making your characters come alive. I was able to see them in my mind as I read the story. I love the relationship between Halley and Gavin. Why did they break up? How were they together as a couple? I want more...please update soon.
3/26/2006 c6 4quillofink
Hey..I just found this story today, and I love it. I think it's just the depth and all the emotions weaved into it that brought me near tears..

I guess it's also because of my own situation and my longing for someone, or a story, that relates to me and understands what I'm feeling and going through. This story is similar, and I can't help but imagine myself and my, uh, significant one as I read.

Anyway, I can't wait for the next chapter. What I love about fictionpress is, there are people out there who are normal people - feeling the same feelings as me and mostly writing because of their own experiences. The stories don't have to be perfect and as book-ified as the novels published usually are...I love the stories because they can come from amateurs. And have so much feeling in them.

If you understood that, yay. =P Just update quick! One bad thing about me is, I am most impatient.
3/25/2006 c6 4Abigail Radle
Very interesting story thus far.I especially liked the way you took the time to insert flashback sequences as they're applicable. Just don't get too carried away with them. They'll take over the entire story and then your reader starts to lose their entire sense of the space/time continuum in the story. I get that a little bit, actually. Especially in this last chapter.

I also noticed that "interoperate" should be "interpret"... or at least I think that's what it's supposed to be, judging from the context of the sentence.

At any rate, your character interactions and conversations are very natural and flowing. Your flashbacks, however, seem to steal the jist of the plot and even some of the character development. Be very careful about how you use them - they can utterly ruin an otherwise beautiful story.
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