for Barefoot4/8/2005 c2 
21Knightmare Elite
Nice addition to the story and good characterization. I like the little tidbits of their pasts. It gives strength their persona's and relationship as a whole.
The shower scene was a welcome tough, though it really wasn't graphic at all. Not saying it was bad or anything, but it was pretty pg-13. Great chapter though. Can't wait for the next.
21Knightmare EliteNice addition to the story and good characterization. I like the little tidbits of their pasts. It gives strength their persona's and relationship as a whole.
The shower scene was a welcome tough, though it really wasn't graphic at all. Not saying it was bad or anything, but it was pretty pg-13. Great chapter though. Can't wait for the next.
4/8/2005 c2 deli-lise
awesome.i really really like your style.
awesome.i really really like your style.
4/8/2005 c2 jezzabel
aha aha aha. perfect. absolute perfection.
someone wanted something non-lesbian? stupid. you write wonderfully. kudos.
aha aha aha. perfect. absolute perfection.
someone wanted something non-lesbian? stupid. you write wonderfully. kudos.
3/26/2005 c1 UnknownEstablisher
I like the way that you write. So you obviously have that down. Detail is precise and great. And your Dialogue is just as great. I think that their should be a (F/F) Slash on this story though. Good job though, I will look back and hopefully you will write something a little less lesbain. LOL!
I like the way that you write. So you obviously have that down. Detail is precise and great. And your Dialogue is just as great. I think that their should be a (F/F) Slash on this story though. Good job though, I will look back and hopefully you will write something a little less lesbain. LOL!
3/25/2005 c1 21Knightmare Elite
I like it, very well thought out. The only thing is was a little confusing to know who was talking or doing what at times. Both characters actions seemed to mesh together. There was also a mispelling here and there. Besides those small issues, I really enjoyed this story. I wouldn't mind seeing a continuation.
It can be difficult to bring someone out of their shell. But in a sense that's part of what's exciting about a relationship like that. It sorta makes the person mysterous and you want to know more about them. That definately kept me reading, sorry for rambling on. Anyway good work.
21Knightmare EliteI like it, very well thought out. The only thing is was a little confusing to know who was talking or doing what at times. Both characters actions seemed to mesh together. There was also a mispelling here and there. Besides those small issues, I really enjoyed this story. I wouldn't mind seeing a continuation.
It can be difficult to bring someone out of their shell. But in a sense that's part of what's exciting about a relationship like that. It sorta makes the person mysterous and you want to know more about them. That definately kept me reading, sorry for rambling on. Anyway good work.
3/24/2005 c1 deli-lise
awesome beginning.keepi it coming please.
awesome beginning.keepi it coming please.
3/24/2005 c1 The 13th Knight
Nice! Its nice and fluff-filled, and the characters are even developed in it, though it is so short. You're a good writer, keep it up!
Nice! Its nice and fluff-filled, and the characters are even developed in it, though it is so short. You're a good writer, keep it up!
3/24/2005 c1 40Daletiel
Well done, as always. You always do a good job of fleshing out your characters, which is something I always like to see. You're quite adept at writing these little vignettes. Keep up the good work.
40DaletielWell done, as always. You always do a good job of fleshing out your characters, which is something I always like to see. You're quite adept at writing these little vignettes. Keep up the good work.
3/24/2005 c1 guess who
story is awesome. i loved how you incorporated both person's sides. sounds somewhat personal, which is good. it makes the story better. you could try going more into both girl's emotions. say why ria likes the ocean and why andie is so uptight. just a suggestion. good job. you should write more like this. :)
story is awesome. i loved how you incorporated both person's sides. sounds somewhat personal, which is good. it makes the story better. you could try going more into both girl's emotions. say why ria likes the ocean and why andie is so uptight. just a suggestion. good job. you should write more like this. :)