
1/1/2006 c12
5Dirty White Belt
Oh I love this story so much!Please make more parts asap!Thanks so much! DWB

Oh I love this story so much!Please make more parts asap!Thanks so much! DWB
12/30/2005 c1
9springish
Okay, okay. It's about time I reviewed this, aye matey? (I'm going for a pirate theme there). And, seeing as it's the Christmas holidays and all, what better time than now? Yes, yes, I like how you started the story off. An introduction to the story and the Academy without spelling it out for the readers. Well done - you obviously have enough faith in your readers to believe that they'll get it. lol. I'm JUST kidding. 'Coz, you know how slow I am and...*sigh* I don't know where I'm going with this 'coz I obviously did get it. Hm, not leaving a very helpful review, am I? Alrighty then. Let me see, did you make up the positions for the school yourself? Ooh and lookie, you even gave the Academy a history. Well, darn tootin' that's mighty smart of you. *salutes*

Okay, okay. It's about time I reviewed this, aye matey? (I'm going for a pirate theme there). And, seeing as it's the Christmas holidays and all, what better time than now? Yes, yes, I like how you started the story off. An introduction to the story and the Academy without spelling it out for the readers. Well done - you obviously have enough faith in your readers to believe that they'll get it. lol. I'm JUST kidding. 'Coz, you know how slow I am and...*sigh* I don't know where I'm going with this 'coz I obviously did get it. Hm, not leaving a very helpful review, am I? Alrighty then. Let me see, did you make up the positions for the school yourself? Ooh and lookie, you even gave the Academy a history. Well, darn tootin' that's mighty smart of you. *salutes*
12/28/2005 c12
13Tenshistar
I'm not offended at all, and no, i'm not Japanese. I'm a European mix. My friend, however, is very interested in the language and i got most of it from a translator then checked to make sure it was right. "Mashumaro Komakai" literally means 'Small Marshmallow' except for the first name last, like i said before. 'Romanchikku Kainashi' is the literal translation of 'Hopeless romantic' with romantic first. I don't know if i told you this, if i have ignore it, but the full name given to me is Heiunno Tenshi or 'angel of tranquility' Tenshi is angel and heiunno=tranquility. Thats just to show you how it works, in a clearer menaing. There are so many different meanings or words to use, that sometimes you can't be sure that what you use is right, but i hope this is close enough. Please use whatever name you want. Its ben fun looking these up. Please update soon. I can't wait to read more.

I'm not offended at all, and no, i'm not Japanese. I'm a European mix. My friend, however, is very interested in the language and i got most of it from a translator then checked to make sure it was right. "Mashumaro Komakai" literally means 'Small Marshmallow' except for the first name last, like i said before. 'Romanchikku Kainashi' is the literal translation of 'Hopeless romantic' with romantic first. I don't know if i told you this, if i have ignore it, but the full name given to me is Heiunno Tenshi or 'angel of tranquility' Tenshi is angel and heiunno=tranquility. Thats just to show you how it works, in a clearer menaing. There are so many different meanings or words to use, that sometimes you can't be sure that what you use is right, but i hope this is close enough. Please use whatever name you want. Its ben fun looking these up. Please update soon. I can't wait to read more.
12/28/2005 c5 alquastear
LOL! I love this story but I an't help but point out something to you... You said somthing about languages "most people could at least speak some basic Italian and French, and even some German, Deutsch, and the even more occasional Luxembourgisch". Just to let you know, Deutsch and German is the SAME thing. Its just that "Deutsch" is german for "german". Lol. It's not Dutch if that was what you were trying to get. Deutsch is not Dutch. Just wanting to pin point that :P =D
LOL! I love this story but I an't help but point out something to you... You said somthing about languages "most people could at least speak some basic Italian and French, and even some German, Deutsch, and the even more occasional Luxembourgisch". Just to let you know, Deutsch and German is the SAME thing. Its just that "Deutsch" is german for "german". Lol. It's not Dutch if that was what you were trying to get. Deutsch is not Dutch. Just wanting to pin point that :P =D
12/27/2005 c12
10Militarylver4eva
First off, Let me wish you and your family a Merry Christmas and a safe and fun filled New Years. Now that that is out of the way, let me say once again, that you are by far the best and most talented writer that I have read on here. And that is not a jest or something to be taken lightly. I trully mean it. I have read alot of stories since becoming a memeber on this site and by far you are the most talented of them all. The way you write, you sound like you have been writing books or stories for all your life. I personally think that you should be publishing this for real. I know that any publishing company would look at this story, which is already on chapter 12, and would think this is worthy of publication. Its just a suggestion, but I really think you should think about publishing this when you finally bring this story to a end. Anyway, I am glad to see you still writing my all time favorite story. I have been waiting ever so patiently for you to update and now that you have, i am not disappointed. Your characters, Ryan and Lee, have evolved so much. It seem like in a way, there is a power stuggle between them both as a matter of fact, there is a power stuggle between them. So much so, that it all came down to where Lee ended up give Ryan the BIG FAT LIP. lol. I kind of think he deserved to be punched, i would have punched him too if I was in Lee's shoes. He was kind of being a idiot in the last chapter so I don't blame Lee for doing what she did. But on the other hand, Ryan is overwhelmed with the whole, I am a Royal and because of this, I have to constantly have a guard with me where ever I go, thing. I can feel for him in that instance. It must be really hard to live like that. I keep thinking about the Royals of England, Prince Harry and Prince William. It must get to be a tad bit annoying to always have a bodyguard around you when you just want to feel Normal. Aha, thats it... Ryan is trying to be normal but with all the scares that his family have gone thru so far,...the near assassination of Jasper and the death of Jake.. he is finding it very hard to do so hence the whole attitude. I am slowly piecing things together as you can see. LOL. But i can only see one thing happening and that is Ryan and Lee will start to let down their guards and that will allow them to be able to build a relationship that goes far beyond Lee being Ryan's bodyguard and Ryan being of royal blood. When they reach this point, all will be well in the world. Haha. That is, if they ever make it there with out killing each other. We can only pray for them to realized that they realy don't hate each other as much as they think they do. Anyway, now that I have written a novel for a review, I was curious as to what will be happening to Hattie. I think it would be great to have her make a surprise entrance somewhere in your upcoming chapters, just to shake the boat a bit. Anyway, good luck with this story and I look forward to reading more.
Militarylver4eva.

First off, Let me wish you and your family a Merry Christmas and a safe and fun filled New Years. Now that that is out of the way, let me say once again, that you are by far the best and most talented writer that I have read on here. And that is not a jest or something to be taken lightly. I trully mean it. I have read alot of stories since becoming a memeber on this site and by far you are the most talented of them all. The way you write, you sound like you have been writing books or stories for all your life. I personally think that you should be publishing this for real. I know that any publishing company would look at this story, which is already on chapter 12, and would think this is worthy of publication. Its just a suggestion, but I really think you should think about publishing this when you finally bring this story to a end. Anyway, I am glad to see you still writing my all time favorite story. I have been waiting ever so patiently for you to update and now that you have, i am not disappointed. Your characters, Ryan and Lee, have evolved so much. It seem like in a way, there is a power stuggle between them both as a matter of fact, there is a power stuggle between them. So much so, that it all came down to where Lee ended up give Ryan the BIG FAT LIP. lol. I kind of think he deserved to be punched, i would have punched him too if I was in Lee's shoes. He was kind of being a idiot in the last chapter so I don't blame Lee for doing what she did. But on the other hand, Ryan is overwhelmed with the whole, I am a Royal and because of this, I have to constantly have a guard with me where ever I go, thing. I can feel for him in that instance. It must be really hard to live like that. I keep thinking about the Royals of England, Prince Harry and Prince William. It must get to be a tad bit annoying to always have a bodyguard around you when you just want to feel Normal. Aha, thats it... Ryan is trying to be normal but with all the scares that his family have gone thru so far,...the near assassination of Jasper and the death of Jake.. he is finding it very hard to do so hence the whole attitude. I am slowly piecing things together as you can see. LOL. But i can only see one thing happening and that is Ryan and Lee will start to let down their guards and that will allow them to be able to build a relationship that goes far beyond Lee being Ryan's bodyguard and Ryan being of royal blood. When they reach this point, all will be well in the world. Haha. That is, if they ever make it there with out killing each other. We can only pray for them to realized that they realy don't hate each other as much as they think they do. Anyway, now that I have written a novel for a review, I was curious as to what will be happening to Hattie. I think it would be great to have her make a surprise entrance somewhere in your upcoming chapters, just to shake the boat a bit. Anyway, good luck with this story and I look forward to reading more.
Militarylver4eva.
12/27/2005 c12
7lilxseeker
YaY...you updated! this chapter is a bit confusing...i mean if she pulled out a gun wouldn't everybody see her and recognize her in the future when she did become the 'girlfriend'...hm anyways update soon please!

YaY...you updated! this chapter is a bit confusing...i mean if she pulled out a gun wouldn't everybody see her and recognize her in the future when she did become the 'girlfriend'...hm anyways update soon please!
12/27/2005 c11
20sloppy firsts
i like the fact that you aren't going to change the previous chapter. it was interesting to see the level of discomfort ryan and lee had in this one =]pi really enjoyed this chapter, very well written.
i was wondering though if you are going to get more political about this story or keep it more centered around romance? the 'no monarchy hail to democracy' line really caught my attention. (politics interest me for some reason lol)
happy new year and keep writing~
s2 chaos

i like the fact that you aren't going to change the previous chapter. it was interesting to see the level of discomfort ryan and lee had in this one =]pi really enjoyed this chapter, very well written.
i was wondering though if you are going to get more political about this story or keep it more centered around romance? the 'no monarchy hail to democracy' line really caught my attention. (politics interest me for some reason lol)
happy new year and keep writing~
s2 chaos
12/11/2005 c11 tash d
awesome chapter! i cant wait 4 more. keep up da good work... :)
awesome chapter! i cant wait 4 more. keep up da good work... :)
12/6/2005 c11 anon
That was great! Update soon!
That was great! Update soon!
12/5/2005 c11
6Pandemonium Express
YOU UPDATED! I LOVE YOU! lol, sorry, I couldn't contain myself. I swear this is my favourite story on fiction press. So Awesome! -^_^- Wow, that was intense. ^^; Hopefully they'll come to understand each other better though.
Hmm, as to your questions:a) I think Lee's nervous and put off because of Ryan's status, which she isn't used to dealing with, kind of offended by how rude he acted, and most of all, just trying to understand him. I don't think she gets him.b)It seems as though the major reason for him not wanting Lee to guard him is as he says/you say that his life is so controlled already that taking away that final freedom feels like he's being pushed too far. Also it could be because he doesn't want another guard to die. I think that's at least a small part of it as well. And least likely, possibly a subconscious thing? He doesn't know how to deal with a non-relative age who isn't a sex object.d) I have no idea how the story will close-that's why I'm reading it. :P I've already mentioned that I HOPE neither Lee nor Ryan dies, and if you bring Hariet(sp?) back, I want her to perhaps have a short romance with whoever, but end up single because otherwise there will be a mushy overdose and she will come off as a stronger character on her own. However, if Ryan or Lee dies (please, no!) you might put her with someone to soften the blow? or not. It could work either way.
Mmkay, I'll shut up now so you can get on with your other gazillion and one reviews. Spectaculific Update and, as always, I can't wait to read more!~Pandemonium

YOU UPDATED! I LOVE YOU! lol, sorry, I couldn't contain myself. I swear this is my favourite story on fiction press. So Awesome! -^_^- Wow, that was intense. ^^; Hopefully they'll come to understand each other better though.
Hmm, as to your questions:a) I think Lee's nervous and put off because of Ryan's status, which she isn't used to dealing with, kind of offended by how rude he acted, and most of all, just trying to understand him. I don't think she gets him.b)It seems as though the major reason for him not wanting Lee to guard him is as he says/you say that his life is so controlled already that taking away that final freedom feels like he's being pushed too far. Also it could be because he doesn't want another guard to die. I think that's at least a small part of it as well. And least likely, possibly a subconscious thing? He doesn't know how to deal with a non-relative age who isn't a sex object.d) I have no idea how the story will close-that's why I'm reading it. :P I've already mentioned that I HOPE neither Lee nor Ryan dies, and if you bring Hariet(sp?) back, I want her to perhaps have a short romance with whoever, but end up single because otherwise there will be a mushy overdose and she will come off as a stronger character on her own. However, if Ryan or Lee dies (please, no!) you might put her with someone to soften the blow? or not. It could work either way.
Mmkay, I'll shut up now so you can get on with your other gazillion and one reviews. Spectaculific Update and, as always, I can't wait to read more!~Pandemonium
12/4/2005 c11
10Hell's first Icicle
hahaz, no, this chappie def didn make me cry! l0lz. she punched him? isnt that... against her orders... or at least wat shez allowed to do? meh. l0lz. hez very pissy. i guess sorta understandably tho, just not maturely so... meh. loved it!

hahaz, no, this chappie def didn make me cry! l0lz. she punched him? isnt that... against her orders... or at least wat shez allowed to do? meh. l0lz. hez very pissy. i guess sorta understandably tho, just not maturely so... meh. loved it!
12/4/2005 c11 mistii
does lee happen to represent anyone that ryan once was close to?
does lee happen to represent anyone that ryan once was close to?
12/4/2005 c11
1Coffee Shopper
um, you're pretty much my god now
and if you update soon, i'll worship you a bazaillions times moreso update son!

um, you're pretty much my god now
and if you update soon, i'll worship you a bazaillions times moreso update son!
12/4/2005 c11 Jess
Hey Nikki, yeah its me :) God, when u told me u updated today, i only thought u put in the bit i read! The story's going really well- I LOVE IT!*cheesy grin*OMG how good was HARRY POTTER! I LOVED IT! Harry = Yummyness. lol Talk more tomorrow,- Jess
Hey Nikki, yeah its me :) God, when u told me u updated today, i only thought u put in the bit i read! The story's going really well- I LOVE IT!*cheesy grin*OMG how good was HARRY POTTER! I LOVED IT! Harry = Yummyness. lol Talk more tomorrow,- Jess