for The Devil May Cry5/30/2006 c1 tzncz
Wow, what bad thing did you do o make you write this? Only kidding...
I like this poem. Scary, the way you made it seem like you're less human than the Devil, have less heart than the Devil. Really powerful.
Keep writing ! ~
Wow, what bad thing did you do o make you write this? Only kidding...
I like this poem. Scary, the way you made it seem like you're less human than the Devil, have less heart than the Devil. Really powerful.
Keep writing ! ~
8/5/2005 c1 
11les petits bateaux
It's not bad, actually, it's pretty good. Loads of anguish and fury, beautiful. :)
~~Trinity
11les petits bateauxIt's not bad, actually, it's pretty good. Loads of anguish and fury, beautiful. :)
~~Trinity
8/5/2005 c1 kakerott
I thorght your poem was great, it sounds alot like a character I made up called David Hunter, who hunts Demons, his life is the way you described it. He doesn't know how to feel because he was never shown feeling as a child. His parents wanted him to be a perfect hunter and that is what they got. Any way enough of my ramberlings It was great I enjoyed it imensly. Kakerott ps My forgemasters story'll be up soon, hopefully, I've nearly completed the first story. What you read was a preview of sorts, I wanted to see what people thorught of my story.
I thorght your poem was great, it sounds alot like a character I made up called David Hunter, who hunts Demons, his life is the way you described it. He doesn't know how to feel because he was never shown feeling as a child. His parents wanted him to be a perfect hunter and that is what they got. Any way enough of my ramberlings It was great I enjoyed it imensly. Kakerott ps My forgemasters story'll be up soon, hopefully, I've nearly completed the first story. What you read was a preview of sorts, I wanted to see what people thorught of my story.
6/2/2005 c1 32pointythings
This is pretty good...it has some good images and wording. I get the feeling it would work better as a rhyming poem though, if you can work that. And maybe instead of the recurring lines involving the words "devil" and "cry", you could just keep repeating the line "the devil may cry" at equal intervals throughout the poem. I know I'm kind of backseat writing there, but I'm not trying to be snobby, honest. Just making a suggestion.Stop reading at this point if you think I'm interfering, because it's about to get worse.Here is an example of how the poem could work:The devil may cryBut I will be strongTears are for sinnersFor those who have wrongedWeeping brings hopeTo lovers of fireBut my hope is crushedBy such weakling desires
And so on. You could probably do it better though.Thanks for letting me waste your time!Yours in writing,~pointythings~
32pointythingsThis is pretty good...it has some good images and wording. I get the feeling it would work better as a rhyming poem though, if you can work that. And maybe instead of the recurring lines involving the words "devil" and "cry", you could just keep repeating the line "the devil may cry" at equal intervals throughout the poem. I know I'm kind of backseat writing there, but I'm not trying to be snobby, honest. Just making a suggestion.Stop reading at this point if you think I'm interfering, because it's about to get worse.Here is an example of how the poem could work:The devil may cryBut I will be strongTears are for sinnersFor those who have wrongedWeeping brings hopeTo lovers of fireBut my hope is crushedBy such weakling desires
And so on. You could probably do it better though.Thanks for letting me waste your time!Yours in writing,~pointythings~
6/2/2005 c1 4eternal-reaper-kid
it's quite cool (considers) yeah quite cool i hope you do more in this vein.
4eternal-reaper-kidit's quite cool (considers) yeah quite cool i hope you do more in this vein.